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Director
Joined: 16 May 2008
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Schools: Cornell '11
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
05 Mar 2009, 08:10
do it now and bring her to ithaca so my wife can hang out with someone
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GMAT Club Legend
Joined: 10 Apr 2007
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
05 Mar 2009, 08:16
I would have said yes if she was moving with you but since you are going to be apart I say wait until after year 1 or at least christmas.
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Kellogg Class of 2010...still active and willing to help. However, I do not do profile reviews, don't offer predictions on chances and am far to busy to review essays, so save the energy of writing me a PM seeking help for these. If I don't respond to a PM that is not one of the previously mentioned trash can destined messages, please don't take it personally I get so many messages I have a hard to responding to most. The more interesting, compelling, or humorous you message the more likely I am to respond. Find out what's new at GMAT Club - latest features and updates
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
05 Mar 2009, 09:46
oddly my friend who is likely headed to Cornell is pretty much in the exact same situation as you. So you're not alone on this. But I essentially agree with river, there's no way to know how things are going to be until you are actually a FT student. So I would hold off on making a decision until then.
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Current Student
Joined: 28 Feb 2008
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
05 Mar 2009, 09:49
I would say yes. If you would get married to her if B-school was not in the path, then definitly yes!
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Current Student
Joined: 27 Jul 2007
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
05 Mar 2009, 09:57
I'm recently engaged and we will have been together 4 years (in about two weeks actually). However, my girlfriend/fiance will be coming to school with me (possibly Cornell  ). I think the 5 hours will be brutal. Hence, I voted to have you wait.
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GMAT Club Legend
Joined: 10 Apr 2007
Posts: 4319
Location: Back in Chicago, IL
Schools: Kellogg Alum: Class of 2010
Followers: 68
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679
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
05 Mar 2009, 10:24
To explain why I said no (to start the year with)...and that can easily change between now and then but here is my take on things I have seen. Some people get engaged before school since they think that added commitment will keep them together. I am of the mind that if you need a ring to keep you together then you probably aren't meant to be anyways. So if you are meant to be you wont need a ring to stay together. However, if you stay together because of a ring, then thats going to be destined to fail. B-school is a strain on and a test of a relationship if you are living together. The honest opinion is that it can be a near death sentence if you are apart...not all relationships fail due to distance but it is extremely challenging if they dont understand what you are dealing with on a day to day basis. However, 5 hours isnt that bad...as long as she is willing to make the trip up to visit you since you are going to be too busy to do it as often then you can easily make it work. Either get engaged right away or do it later in the fall. Doing it shortly before you head to school probably wont get her as excited haha.
_________________
Kellogg Class of 2010...still active and willing to help. However, I do not do profile reviews, don't offer predictions on chances and am far to busy to review essays, so save the energy of writing me a PM seeking help for these. If I don't respond to a PM that is not one of the previously mentioned trash can destined messages, please don't take it personally I get so many messages I have a hard to responding to most. The more interesting, compelling, or humorous you message the more likely I am to respond. Find out what's new at GMAT Club - latest features and updates
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Manager
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
05 Mar 2009, 15:07
young_gun, I hope your girlfriend doesn't read gmatclub. My girlfriend would kill me if I polled a bunch of strangers on an forum for that kind of decision.
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Current Student
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
05 Mar 2009, 15:10
liubhs02 wrote: young_gun, I hope your girlfriend doesn't read gmatclub.  uhh me too
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Intern
Joined: 15 Feb 2008
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
05 Mar 2009, 15:14
Taking away the romantic considerations for a moment, people are cool with tossing an extra 10k on top of cost? Added strain if you're making payments while taking on debt. Or using money at 8.5% to pay off money at X%
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Senior Manager
Joined: 16 Jul 2008
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
06 Mar 2009, 01:28
Definitely go for it. It's a nice gesture, showing that despite your b-school plans and career goals you are firmly committed to the relationship. It isn't the ring that keeps you together, but the commitment that the ring symbolises.
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
06 Mar 2009, 04:35
I'm in the same situation. We've been dating for more than five years and soon to be engaged. I don't know whether she should come with me or not..
By the way, there's going to be a time difference of 7 hours between her and me. We are used to having it long distance, since we were in different cities while we were both undergraduates..
Dont know what to do yet..
Last edited by oziozzie on 06 Mar 2009, 06:15, edited 1 time in total.
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Current Student
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
06 Mar 2009, 05:17
Wait one full year. If you still feel the same way then, buy the ring over the summer, propose, and get married the following summer, when you should be raking in the big bucks.
I've always felt you can't lose what is already yours, and this rule is particularly true when it comes to women. If you lost her over going to Cornell to better yourself for about 1.5 years (minus vacations), she is really doing you a favor in the long-run.
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Senior Manager
Joined: 16 Jul 2008
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
06 Mar 2009, 06:34
jjright wrote: I've always felt you can't lose what is already yours, and this rule is particularly true when it comes to women. Do you realise how much women hate this attitude? My $0.02 - when you take something for granted, you lose it, and this is particularly true when it comes to women.
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GMAT Club Legend
Affiliations: HHonors Diamond, BGS Honor Society
Joined: 05 Apr 2006
Posts: 5881
Schools: Chicago (Booth) - Class of 2009
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
06 Mar 2009, 07:30
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Senior Manager
Joined: 07 Jan 2008
Posts: 321
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
06 Mar 2009, 07:47
I can't believe this is a post - why don't you talk to your significant other and make the decision together.
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Current Student
Joined: 31 Aug 2007
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
06 Mar 2009, 07:49
Nerdboy wrote: jjright wrote: I've always felt you can't lose what is already yours, and this rule is particularly true when it comes to women. Do you realise how much women hate this attitude? My $0.02 - when you take something for granted, you lose it, and this is particularly true when it comes to women. i think jj must mean "you can't lose what ISN'T yours"...right?
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Current Student
Joined: 31 Aug 2007
Posts: 374
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
06 Mar 2009, 07:51
oziozzie wrote: I'm in the same situation. We've been dating for more than five years and soon to be engaged. I don't know whether she should come with me or not..
By the way, there's going to be a time difference of 7 hours between her and me. We are used to having it long distance, since we were in different cities while we were both undergraduates..
Dont know what to do yet.. if it's easy for her to move with you, then why not? but what would she do in ithaca, for example?
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Current Student
Joined: 26 Mar 2008
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
06 Mar 2009, 08:32
I strongly disagree. Nobody is talking about taking anyone "for granted". I've been with enough women to know that the only sure fire way to lose one is to fear her loss, and allowing that fear to drive you into action. But that's just my humble 0.02 Nerdboy wrote: jjright wrote: I've always felt you can't lose what is already yours, and this rule is particularly true when it comes to women. Do you realise how much women hate this attitude? My $0.02 - when you take something for granted, you lose it, and this is particularly true when it comes to women.
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Current Student
Joined: 26 Mar 2008
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
06 Mar 2009, 08:34
thanks young gun  young_gun wrote: Nerdboy wrote: jjright wrote: I've always felt you can't lose what is already yours, and this rule is particularly true when it comes to women. Do you realise how much women hate this attitude? My $0.02 - when you take something for granted, you lose it, and this is particularly true when it comes to women. i think jj must mean "you can't lose what ISN'T yours"...right?
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Current Student
Joined: 31 Aug 2007
Posts: 374
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Re: get engaged before bschool? [#permalink]
06 Mar 2009, 12:53
anyone just throwing in the towel prior to school?
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Re: get engaged before bschool?
[#permalink]
06 Mar 2009, 12:53
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