Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative : Sentence Correction (EA only)

vivesomnium

Manager

Joined: 09 Feb 2011

Posts: 175

Own Kudos [?]: 459 [7]

Given Kudos: 13

Concentration: General Management, Social Entrepreneurship

Schools: HBS '14 (A)

GMAT 1: 770 Q50 V47

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

03 Apr 2011, 20:51

3

Kudos

4

Bookmarks

All the options have colons. A colon is typically used to introduce something that follows, such as a list or a quotation.
A colon marks a discontinuity in a sentence with more force than a comma or semicolon.
In C lets say the colon was not there- the sentence would still have been perfect. I have 5 friends including X Y Z A and B.
Use of 'the following' makes the 1st part of the sentence a complete construction gramatically, hence preparing for the discontinuity introduced in the sentence by the use of the colon subsequently.
Also, it prepares the reader that a list is about to be given, which is the indication of the use of colon.

L

GyanOne

CEO

Joined: 24 Jul 2011

Status: World Rank #4 MBA Admissions Consultant

Posts: 3187

Own Kudos [?]: 1585 [0]

Given Kudos: 33

GMAT 1: 780 Q51 V48

GRE 1: Q170 V170

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

25 Jul 2011, 02:09

Expert Reply

It should be (A).

(1) 'imbalance of the fish population' is parallel with 'the introduction of harmful chemicals....'
(2) Also, 'the introduction' is needed in the beginning to keep the parallel structure.

L

daagh

GMAT Club Legend

Joined: 19 Feb 2007

Status: enjoying

Posts: 5265

Own Kudos [?]: 42104 [2]

Given Kudos: 422

Location: India

WE:Education (Education)

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

25 Jul 2011, 03:02

2

Bookmarks

Expert Reply

No doubt ‘including the following’ is redundant. Between B and C that drop this phrase, C is better because the fourth arm of the list namely, ‘harmful chemicals entering the ocean’s environment’ in B is not the same as ‘the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment’ in C both in meaning and //ism with other arms of the list.

rphardu

Manager

Joined: 23 May 2011

Status:Appearing for GMAT

Posts: 70

Own Kudos [?]: 836 [3]

Given Kudos: 34

Location: United States (NJ)

Concentration: Finance, General Management

GPA: 3.5

WE:Information Technology (Computer Software)

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

25 Jul 2011, 18:48

3

Kudos

AnkitK wrote:

Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative effects including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.

A) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.
B) including: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and harmful chemicals entering the ocean's environment.
C) including: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.
D) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and harmful chemicals entering the ocean’s environment.
E) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, certain fish populations rising, certain fish populations falling, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean’s environment.

Very nice explanation from senior member daagh about why "following" is mandatory here.

The basic essence of the use of colon is that the preceding clause lying before the mark, should not leave an inkling of incompleteness. It should stand by itself but more importantly should not tend to end abruptly in meaning before the colon and should not lean on the list for completing the meaning. Thus it becomes essential, wordy though, to use the word 'following'. B and C therefore fall by the wayside.

Among A, D and E, D breaks the sense of llism by using an absolute phrase ‘ harmful chemicals entering’ in the fourth arm of the list.
E distorts the meaning in trying to define imbalance of fish population in a weird day.

Maintaining perfect llism, A stands out as the eligible choice, IMO.

GMATmission

Manager

Joined: 16 Aug 2011

Status:Bell the GMAT!!!

Affiliations: Aidha

Posts: 109

Own Kudos [?]: 190 [4]

Given Kudos: 43

Location: Singapore

Concentration: Finance, General Management

Schools: INSEAD Jan '13 Said LBS '14

GMAT 1: 680 Q46 V37

GMAT 2: 620 Q49 V27

GMAT 3: 700 Q49 V36

WE:Other (Other)

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

14 Oct 2011, 07:07

1

Kudos

3

Bookmarks

rphardu wrote:

AnkitK wrote:

Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative effects including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.

A) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.
B) including: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and harmful chemicals entering the ocean's environment.
C) including: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.
D) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and harmful chemicals entering the ocean’s environment.
E) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, certain fish populations rising, certain fish populations falling, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean’s environment.

Very nice explanation from senior member daagh about why "following" is mandatory here.

The basic essence of the use of colon is that the preceding clause lying before the mark, should not leave an inkling of incompleteness. It should stand by itself but more importantly should not tend to end abruptly in meaning before the colon and should not lean on the list for completing the meaning. Thus it becomes essential, wordy though, to use the word 'following'. B and C therefore fall by the wayside.

Among A, D and E, D breaks the sense of llism by using an absolute phrase ‘ harmful chemicals entering’ in the fourth arm of the list.
E distorts the meaning in trying to define imbalance of fish population in a weird day.

Maintaining perfect llism, A stands out as the eligible choice, IMO.

I agree that the use of following is required here. I had noted from somewhere (dnt remember where so Can't give due credit), that colon should not be used at following places:

1). After such as or including

All of the old gang were there, including : Mush Head, Beaver, Sparky, and Mole.- Incorrect colon use

2). Directly after a form of verb be

The three most popular composers of classical music, according to the poll, are : Bach, Mozart, and Beethoven.- Incorrect colon use

3). Between a verb and its object or between a preposition and its object.

The tourists went to: Toronto, Montreal, and Quebec.- Incorrect colon use

L

daagh

GMAT Club Legend

Joined: 19 Feb 2007

Status: enjoying

Posts: 5265

Own Kudos [?]: 42104 [2]

Given Kudos: 422

Location: India

WE:Education (Education)

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

14 Oct 2011, 08:55

2

Kudos

Expert Reply

Yes, I agree; following is indeed required to complete the sentence. A is the right answer.

However, there is an interesting aside to this issue, which I saw just now. An honorable member by name rpardhu has observed the following about me saying “very nice explanation from senior member daagh about why "following" is mandatory here”. One can see the sarcasm there

But the funny part is that I never explained any such thing about ‘following’ so nicely. Nor did I say ‘following’ is mandatory

I simply said that ‘no doubt following is redundant’. Probably our honorable member did not know the difference between redundant and mandatory.

To help him understand, let me make it clear the mandatory means required by authority or compulsory; redundant means superfluous or excess. I think this should help our honorable member. However, considering that everybody is human and everybody is error-prone, I will ignore this allusion.

G

GMATPill

SVP

Joined: 14 Apr 2009

Posts: 2261

Own Kudos [?]: 3671 [2]

Given Kudos: 8

Location: New York, NY

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

25 Mar 2012, 20:22

2

Kudos

If you use "including" which is a verb, it should have an object after it...including what? WIth a colon, you can't just end it with a verb...the phrase on the left side of the colon would be incomplete. "Including the following" works better because it wraps up the phrase. Then on the right side of the colon, you can list out the item list.

aks456

Manager

Joined: 20 Jul 2012

Posts: 92

Own Kudos [?]: 139 [0]

Given Kudos: 559

Location: India

WE:Information Technology (Computer Software)

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

10 Sep 2013, 12:36

kingb wrote:

Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative effects including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.

A) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.
B) including: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and harmful chemicals entering the ocean's environment.
C) including: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.
D) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and harmful chemicals entering the ocean’s environment.
E) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, certain fish populations rising, certain fish populations falling, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean’s environment.

Show Spoiler

A) This sentence is correct as is because all of the items in the list are parallel form. Each of the items is a noun that names a harmful effect of land erosion. The construction of the list is also correct. The noun following, which immediately precedes the list, correctly renames the items in the series.

B) The construction of the list in this sentence is incorrect. In a list, the word immediately preceding the colon should rename the items found in the list. Including does not rename the items in the list. The items in the series are not in parallel form. All of the items in the series are nouns, with the exception of harmful chemicals entering the ocean's environment, which is an absolute phrase. In order for the structure to be parallel, the last item must be in the form of a noun as well.

C) The construction of the list in this sentence is incorrect. In a list, the word immediately preceding the colon should rename the items found in the list. Including does not rename the items in the list.

D) The items in the series are not in parallel form. All of the items in the series are nouns, with the exception of harmful chemicals entering the ocean's environment, which is an absolute phrase. In order for the structure to be parallel, the last item must be in the form of a noun as well.

E) The items in the series are not in a parallel form. With the exception of certain fish populations rising and certain fish populations falling, which are absolute phrases, all of the items in the series are nouns. The absolutes also make the sentence longer and wordier than necessary.

Down to (a) and (c)..is "including the following" required instead of "including"? is it because we are mentioning a list? Experts please help..

Bluelagoon

Manager

Joined: 21 Jan 2010

Posts: 193

Own Kudos [?]: 610 [2]

Given Kudos: 12

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

10 Sep 2013, 18:10

1

Kudos

1

Bookmarks

akankshasoneja wrote:

kingb wrote:

Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative effects including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.

A) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.
B) including: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and harmful chemicals entering the ocean's environment.
C) including: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.
D) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and harmful chemicals entering the ocean’s environment.
E) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, certain fish populations rising, certain fish populations falling, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean’s environment.

Show Spoiler

A) This sentence is correct as is because all of the items in the list are parallel form. Each of the items is a noun that names a harmful effect of land erosion. The construction of the list is also correct. The noun following, which immediately precedes the list, correctly renames the items in the series.

B) The construction of the list in this sentence is incorrect. In a list, the word immediately preceding the colon should rename the items found in the list. Including does not rename the items in the list. The items in the series are not in parallel form. All of the items in the series are nouns, with the exception of harmful chemicals entering the ocean's environment, which is an absolute phrase. In order for the structure to be parallel, the last item must be in the form of a noun as well.

C) The construction of the list in this sentence is incorrect. In a list, the word immediately preceding the colon should rename the items found in the list. Including does not rename the items in the list.

D) The items in the series are not in parallel form. All of the items in the series are nouns, with the exception of harmful chemicals entering the ocean's environment, which is an absolute phrase. In order for the structure to be parallel, the last item must be in the form of a noun as well.

E) The items in the series are not in a parallel form. With the exception of certain fish populations rising and certain fish populations falling, which are absolute phrases, all of the items in the series are nouns. The absolutes also make the sentence longer and wordier than necessary.

Down to (a) and (c)..is "including the following" required instead of "including"? is it because we are mentioning a list? Experts please help..

Down to the basic grammatical rule for colons. The sentence before the colon should be a complete clause. That is the reason C gets knocked off.

B

PiyushK

Director

Joined: 22 Mar 2013

Status:Everyone is a leader. Just stop listening to others.

Posts: 611

Own Kudos [?]: 4595 [4]

Given Kudos: 235

Location: India

GPA: 3.51

WE:Information Technology (Computer Software)

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

26 Apr 2014, 14:09

1

Kudos

3

Bookmarks

Common colon mistakes
Using a colon between a verb and its object or complement

Example (incorrect): The very best peaches are: those that are grown in the great state of Georgia.
To correct this, simply remove the colon.

Using a colon between a preposition and its object

Example (incorrect): My favorite cake is made of: carrots, flour, butter, eggs, and cream cheese icing.
To correct this, simply remove the colon.

Using a colon after “such as,” “including,” “especially,” and similar phrases. This violates the rule that the material preceding the colon must be a complete thought. Look, for example, at the following sentence:

Example (incorrect): There are many different types of paper, including: college ruled, wide ruled, and plain copy paper.
You can see that “There are many different types of paper, including” is not a complete sentence. The colon should simply be removed.

Source : https://writingcenter.unc.edu/handouts/s ... nd-dashes/

janxavier

Intern

Joined: 28 Dec 2013

Posts: 23

Own Kudos [?]: 71 [1]

Given Kudos: 18

Location: United States

GPA: 3

WE:Information Technology (Insurance)

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

07 Jul 2014, 05:22

1

Bookmarks

Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative effects including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.
A) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.
B) including: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and harmful chemicals entering the ocean's environment - parallellism issue.
C) including: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.
D) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and harmful chemicals entering the ocean’s environment.
E) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, certain fish populations rising, certain fish populations falling, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean’s environment

"including the following: " wrng semi colon usage issue - Source MGMAT - Sentence Correction - Ed . 5 - Chapter 10 and also refer https://academics.smcvt.edu/writingctr/semicolons.htm

kongaharsha

Intern

Joined: 29 Aug 2015

Posts: 7

Own Kudos [?]: 4 [0]

Given Kudos: 0

Concentration: Strategy, Technology

Schools: Tuck '18 Tepper '18 NUS '18 CBS '16

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

08 Dec 2015, 17:37

Can someone explain why entering is wrong in D. Much appreciated

L

daagh

GMAT Club Legend

Joined: 19 Feb 2007

Status: enjoying

Posts: 5265

Own Kudos [?]: 42104 [0]

Given Kudos: 422

Location: India

WE:Education (Education)

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

08 Dec 2015, 21:42

Expert Reply

kongaharsha
Here, ‘harmful chemicals entering’ is not a gerund (noun) as many would tend to call. It is a present participle. It is unparallel to other nouns mentioned in the list. If you want to use entering as a gerund, you must say, ‘the harmful chemicals’ entering’, or 'the entering of harmful chemicals', both of which are just not elegant. When you have a better alternative in the form of a normal noun, such as 'the introduction', it is unstylistic to use ‘entering’. After all, the chemicals cannot enter by themselves unless somebody does the entering.

Prachi1002

Intern

Joined: 05 Apr 2017

Posts: 3

Own Kudos [?]: 0 [0]

Given Kudos: 1

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

27 Apr 2017, 00:07

Why would you choose A over C in this question?

G

sayantanc2k

CR Moderator

Joined: 14 Dec 2013

Posts: 2413

Own Kudos [?]: 15266 [0]

Given Kudos: 26

Location: Germany

Schools:

GMAT 1: 780 Q50 V47

WE:Corporate Finance (Pharmaceuticals and Biotech)

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

30 Apr 2017, 03:28

Expert Reply

Prachi1002 wrote:

Why would you choose A over C in this question?

C is incomplete - there is no object for "including". If the colon were not there, then C would be correct as well.

S

eddy8700

Manager

Joined: 25 Jan 2016

Status:active

Posts: 91

Own Kudos [?]: 75 [1]

Given Kudos: 12

Location: India

Concentration: Finance, Entrepreneurship

Schools: Rotman '19 Insead Sept'18 Booth '19

GPA: 4

WE:Web Development (Computer Software)

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

30 Apr 2017, 06:34

1

Kudos

Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative effects including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.

A) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.
B) including: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and harmful chemicals entering the ocean's environment.
C) including: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment.
D) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and harmful chemicals entering the ocean’s environment.
E) including the following: algae blooms, coral reef destruction, certain fish populations rising, certain fish populations falling, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean’s environment.

answer is A

B

Gmat800Champ

Intern

Joined: 20 Apr 2018

Posts: 36

Own Kudos [?]: 25 [0]

Given Kudos: 622

Send PM

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

31 May 2018, 03:38

I have understood including the following explanation. However, I still can't figure out why the list "algae blooms, coral reef destruction, imbalance of the fish population, and the introduction of harmful chemicals to the ocean's environment" is parallel?

Can anyone please explain what role each part plays in the list?

gmatclubot

Re: Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative [#permalink]

31 May 2018, 03:38

GMAT Sentence Correction (EA only) Questions

Heightened land erosion, caused by human activity, has many negative