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Issue: Please critique

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Issue: Please critique [#permalink] New post 07 Mar 2010, 14:25
Hi members,

Can you please let me know what you think of my issue? I know its not a great one but all I am looking for is a __
Will let you know what the dash above is after you critique.

AWA ESSAYS: Analyze Issues
ESSAY QUESTION:
"The purpose of government is not to ensure the financial well-being of its citizens, but rather to maintain order."

From your perspective, how accurate is the above statement? Support your position with reasons and/or examples from your own experience, observations, or reading.

YOUR RESPONSE:
I do not agree with the statement that the purpose of the government is to maintain order but not to ensure the financial well-being of its citizens. The citizens look up to the government for their well being in terms of any sector of life. It could be the health, the business, finance, or any other sector that the citizens deal with in their day to day life.

The maintenance of order is one of the core functions of the government but not the only one. It has many other functions such as defending its borders, investing in research, looking after the well-being of its citizens in terms of health, and financial stability.

The government is not responsible and it is not fair to expect the government to take care of each and every citizen but the government is supposed to create pools of everything. It should create a pool of jobs, a pool of opportunities, a pool of choices etc. It is up to the citizens to decide whether they want to jump into the pool or not. The citizens can definitely complain that the pool is not very clean or that it is too small and the government must act on it. However the citizens cannot complain that they do not want to seize an opportunity provided by the government.

Maintenance of order is one of the core functionalities of the government. Many other functionalities are very closely related to this. If there is no order, there will be political unrest which can be very chaotic. It is therefore very essential that the government maintains order but to ensure order is not the only purpose of the government. Citizens usually can take it for granted that the government maintains order. If it doesn't, it might end up failing the government itself.

Financial well-being of its citizens is another of the core functionalities of the government. If the citizens are not satisfied with their financial situation, they might go against the government. If majority of the citizens are happy with their financial status, they might continue with their normal life. Ensuring that citizens lead a normal life is very important for the government because as long as people are busy, they will go on a normal routine. When they don't have a job or when they are not satisfied with their financial status, that is the time when they usually start complaining, criticizing the government and slowly start to show criminal tendencies. This might make the government work harder to maintain the order.

Thus, just concentrating on one issue is never good for the government. Citizens normally expect a lot from the government. As long as the government keeps a majority of its citizen busy and happy, I feel the purpose of the government is met. The rest can be controlled by maintaining order.
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Re: Issue: Please critique [#permalink] New post 07 Mar 2010, 14:26
Please also critique my argument:

ESSAY QUESTION:
The following appeared in an article in a consumer-electronics magazine:

"Company X's latest model of digital camera to be released next month, the TR12, is being promoted as the most portable, user-friendly digital camera available, and also an excellent bargain. It can be expected to live up to these claims, because Company X's previous model, the TR11, was universally lauded as setting the standard in these areas last year."

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. Point out flaws in the argument's logic and analyze the argument's underlying assumptions. In addition, evaluate how supporting evidence is used and what evidence might counter the argument's conclusion. You may also discuss what additional evidence could be used to strengthen the argument or what changes would make the argument more logically sound.





YOUR RESPONSE:
The argument presented above regarding the expectations of the latest model of digital camera based on the company's previous model of the is flawed because the premises stated do not necessarily support the conclusion of the argument. The argument is brittle due to a few reasons.

Firstly, the expectations are very ambitious as they are dependent on the success of its previous model. This can be related to a model of a car or a version of software. Just because a particular year's make or version is good, doesn't necessarily mean that the next model or version is going to be good too. There may be many reasons why the next model is going to under-perform that the current model.

Secondly, it is mentioned that the company's previous model, TR11, has set a standard in the areas of portability, and user-friendliness. There might have been another camera released by a different company which might have re-written the standards set by TR11 and if the new model of the camera, TR12, is going to follow the standards that are set by the TR11, it might not be well received by the people. Although it has not been explicitly stated that the TR11 is going to follow the standards of TR11, it is implied so by saying that the previous model TR11 has set the standards in the areas of portability and user-friendliness.

A better argument could have been to compare the features of TR12 camera to those of the model that is believed to have set the standards the current day. The prices should be compared with the current model which can be that of the same company or that of a different company as just mentioning the TR12 to be an excellent bargain is not sufficient. It should be compared to the price of a similar model with similar features.

Due to the reasons mentioned above, and because of lacking strong premises that sufficiently support the conclusion of the argument, the argument is flawed.
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Re: Issue: Please critique [#permalink] New post 10 Mar 2010, 13:26
Hi,

Can someone please comment on my issue and argument essays. My exam date is in 10 days and I will definitely let the community know how my actual essays went and what I got in the actual exam. This will help me and also the community.

Thank you.
Re: Issue: Please critique   [#permalink] 10 Mar 2010, 13:26
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