Well really you are wrong. This is not a farse. I was hedging my bets that I would be able to drive further, get to campus, see how I liked it, and then if I liked it I would stay. I am not going to stay two years in a town I do not like. I unfortunately, am not married so I don't have the luxury of taking a partner like yourself.
I also have had to deal with some major family issues over the last 6 months. My father had prostate cancer, and became disabled, at least in terms of work, since he also began to have seizures and could not drive anymore. Somehow the infection he got after his surgery caused an opening in his blood vessels in his brain and that caused his seizues. I also have the issue with my mentally ill mother and my concerns about her losing her house and who knows where she will end up. It's not like I am walking away from a perfectly happy home situation where I am not concerned about anyone. I have major concerns about both of my parents, and unfortunately, as an only child (too bad they couldn't have made more babies) I am really the only one left to pick up the pieces. My parents are less than 60 years old, but I feel like I have to worry about them more than I have to worry about my 85 year old grandmother.
Plus I had my own health problems to worry about..I had difficulty swallowing brought on my acid reflux..needless to say it was very difficult for me to eat for about 4 months..talk about taking a life toll..I could not go out to eat with friends or take a date out..I would always feel like food was getting stuck..and it was not a pretty site..the medication finally resolved that only within the last three weeks.
And it was not the 700 mile drive that scared me. It was the fact I thought I was going to be able to go farther last night than I was able to go. I was about two hours into the trip when my cell phone battery went low..I looked for my car charger. I could not find it. I had to stop off in some down..and drive to the walmart to get another one...that took about an hour with traffic. It was really a non option. I was not going to be on an interstate late at night with no communication. Then a little later..I got very tired..I even stopped off at a rest stop..took a few caffeine pills and washed it down with Mountain Dew...I was still very drowsy afterwards so I decided to stay in a hotel here in Dayton Ohio. I am posting from a holiday in express. I was not in shape to drive. There were 18 wheelers on my butt with cement barriers on both sides of me..if anything went wrong, I was going to be dust..the speed there was about 70 MPH. I felt myself drifting off. I did try to keep myself awake so I could keep driving, but it wasn't happening.
I thought I would at least 2/3 to 3/4 of the way there when I started out this morning, but due to the above situation, I only got to the 260 marker on my first night. I would have to drive until 4PM today STRAIGHT to make it there..if I didn't like the campus, I would have to start driving back immediately to make it to work on Monday.
And also people think I will be able to go back home on a regular basis. I did the math on the finances, and car expenses cannot be factored into financial aid..so i am not sure how much longer I would be able to keep my car..
I will admit to being a wobbler, but for good reason. If I don't like the campus, and I need to apply next year, I need to have a job so i don't go through all of my savings over the next year.
I also think nearly anyone would be wobbling with the home situations that I have. Really, I would be farther from home than I would be if I were in NYC or Boston..really Columbia is that far from Pittsburgh.
Boston is only 588..nyc is 340..Columbia is over 700 miles..people don't realize how much longer it takes
I wished I didn't have the worries I have, but for me not to care would basically force me to shut down my conscience. Being a very caring and loving person, that is not an option. If I was the only person I had to worry about I would have been in school already. I am willing to bet on my own success but the problem is I have more than myself to worry about. So before you call anyone pathetic, please understand the entire story before you cast aspersions.
GMATT73 wrote:
James, I hate to do this but I'm calling you out. I think this whole act your putting on is a farse. Seriously, how in the world could somebody score a 700 on the GMAT, slave hours over applications, get a full ride scholarship plus a handsome assistantship, only to bail out over a simple 700 mile drive?
Amazing.
I just walked away from a high salary (sure seems high now) and a very comfortable lifestyle, went immediately $40K+ in debt and flew 7000 miles to take a shot at a dream. Risky? **** straight it is, yet anything worth having in this world will involve hedging your bets; and if you can't wager on your own success, then I really take pity on your pathetic life.
Seriously, if you aren't going to go, then go back to your Pittburg job and stop posting in our forum, because IMHO all you bring is negative energy to the table. I've never met, let alone known of such a wobbler like you. Like I said before, I'm calling your bluff.