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Please give me a clue how good/bad is my essay

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Author Message
Joined: 31 Dec 1969
Location: United States
Concentration: Leadership, Strategy
GMAT 1: 730 Q50 V38
GMAT 2: Q0 V0
GMAT 3: 710 Q48 V38
GPA: 2.76
WE: Accounting (Accounting)
Followers: 0

Kudos [?]: 76 [0], given: 81071

Please give me a clue how good/bad is my essay [#permalink] New post 03 Aug 2011, 01:42
ARGUMENT
’The producers of the forthcoming movie 3003 will be most likely to maximize their profits if they are willing to pay Robin Good several million dollars to star in it - even though that amount is far more than any other person involved in the movie will make. After all, Robin has in the past been paid a similar amount to work in several films that were very financially successful.’

ESSAY
According to the argument, forthcoming movie 3003 will be a success if producers will pay Robin Good several million dollars to play in it. In the past Robin has been paid similar amounts in several movies that were successful.

Based on the information provided, it is not possible to conclude that the movie will be a success if Robin Good will have a role in it. In following paragraphs, I will analyze flaws of the argument.

First of all, a successful movie is comprised of many components, starting with a plot and finishing with a soundtrack. Only one component cannot prescribe the outcome. In this case, producers could make a movie which shows only Robin Good on the stage. Well, this would not become a blockbuster. Before hiring an expensive actor, it necessary to make sure that all other parts of the movie are on point.

Secondly, it is important to find a suitable actor for the role. Robin might be a perfect actor for an action movie, but not imaginable as drama actor. Evaluation concerning suitability of Robin as an actor for the movie 3003 would strengthen the argument.

Thirdly, even if Robin is suitable for the role, will he be interested to take part in it? Usually star actors are extremely cautious when it comes to choosing roles. They realize that unsuitable or badly played role will damage their image dramatically. Argument should state, if Robin is eager to take the role or at least make a realistic prediction if he would be interested.

Finally, Robin has played in successful movies. But what about his roles in average or even bad movies? The fact that Robin has taken part in successful movies does not mean that all movies starring him must become blockbusters. The author should provide more substantial reasons, than just referring to past success.

There are many questions that need to be answered before author can conclude that Robin Good will be actually beneficial to the success of the forthcoming movie 3003. If problems mentioned in previous paragraph will find their answers, the argument would sound much stronger.
Intern
Intern
User avatar
Status: App Time
Joined: 30 Nov 2010
Posts: 40
Location: United States (PA)
Concentration: Entrepreneurship, Technology
GMAT 1: 710 Q48 V38
GPA: 3.2
WE: Information Technology (Computer Software)
Followers: 0

Kudos [?]: 3 [0], given: 0

Re: Please give me a clue how good/bad is my essay [#permalink] New post 03 Aug 2011, 07:24
Very well written.

My only comment is to maybe add more content to your body paragraphs. You usually want something close to 400 words.

Keep practicing!!
_________________

My GMAT Story: tale-of-a-first-timer

Joined: 31 Dec 1969
Location: United States
Concentration: Leadership, Strategy
GMAT 1: 730 Q50 V38
GMAT 2: Q0 V0
GMAT 3: 710 Q48 V38
GPA: 2.76
WE: Accounting (Accounting)
Followers: 0

Kudos [?]: 76 [0], given: 81071

Re: Please give me a clue how good/bad is my essay [#permalink] New post 03 Aug 2011, 08:12
Can somebody suggest what score could I get for this essay? Thanks a lot :)
Intern
Intern
User avatar
Status: App Time
Joined: 30 Nov 2010
Posts: 40
Location: United States (PA)
Concentration: Entrepreneurship, Technology
GMAT 1: 710 Q48 V38
GPA: 3.2
WE: Information Technology (Computer Software)
Followers: 0

Kudos [?]: 3 [0], given: 0

Re: Please give me a clue how good/bad is my essay [#permalink] New post 03 Aug 2011, 11:34
If I were to guess, between 5 and 6. Of course, I'm no expert.
_________________

My GMAT Story: tale-of-a-first-timer

Re: Please give me a clue how good/bad is my essay   [#permalink] 03 Aug 2011, 11:34
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Please give me a clue how good/bad is my essay

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