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Please rate my essay (day 1)

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Joined: 26 Jan 2014
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Please rate my essay (day 1) [#permalink] New post 26 Jan 2014, 08:06
Hi everyone,

I am just starting my preparation for the TOEFL test. Thus, as I know that writting and speaking might be the categories where I will score probably low, I have decided on adopting an apporach of writting an essay every day.

Here is day 1 essay, written for 10 mins exactly. (I guess the time for the independent task is 20 mins, but I am aiming for 30/30 - so lets strech it!)

Always telling the truth is the most important consideration in any relationship.

We live in a world where relationships are the basis for every kind of human interaction. People use relationships to fundament their connectedness to one another, which results in forms of love, friendship, business and, unfortunately, even wars. Thus, such kind of interactions are very fragile in terms of keeping a healthy balance between the responsibilities of each party in the relationship. In my opinion, this implies high moral and ethical factors, which need to be taken in consideration in order to ultimately sustain a transparent and long-lasting experience ensuring thrust and belief in each other.

Firstly, I thoroughly believe that a relationship between two persons should carry the mark of trust as this is one of the main factors for stability in the relationship, the fact that your partner can trust and rely on you, surely, enhances your ability of being confident in your life endeavors when you know that there is somebody carrying about you at home.

Secondly, especially when dealing with business relationship, trust is among the most important dimensions of the long-term perspectives. For example, a company establishing an international model abroad will need to rely on local partners for its new strategy implication. Such move would require the market entering firm to rely entirely on the decisions made by the local company. Respectively, if there is no trust between such partners, there is no ground for the long-term success.

Thirdly and most importantly, I honestly believe that receiving trust from somebody means that person is certainly respecting you. In fact, to receive such a respect is very honorable act, especially in a romatic relationship where the other person has opened his heart for you. Cheating on such an endeavor and lying to this person is definitely showing low level of moral and ethics.

In conclusion, I believe that saying the truth in a relationship is the most important consideration in any relationship as it is the solely fundament of any interaction. Moreover, being able to respond to such interaction can be considered a very high-level of human development
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Joined: 01 Nov 2013
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Location: United States
GMAT 1: 730 Q49 V40
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Re: Please rate my essay (day 1) [#permalink] New post 29 Jan 2014, 20:59
This is a great essay and you will probably get a high score in Writing section. Make sure to utilize your time judiciously and write as well as you have written this one, you will get 28-29 easily.
Joined: 26 Jan 2014
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Re: Please rate my essay (day 1) [#permalink] New post 30 Jan 2014, 00:41
Thank you!

Here is another one, which I wrote yesterday:

It has been said, “Not everything that is learned is contained in books.” Compare and contrast knowledge gained from experience with knowledge gained from books. In your opinion, which source is more important? Why?

Learning, a fundamental human right, can be considered one of the main abilities in differentiating people in terms of their knowledge and ultimate success in life. Learning starts from ones’ early childhood and probably lasts until his very last day. This process is ultimately leading to accumulating knowledge, which is fostered by two main principles, either to read books or to gain it through life experience. In my opinion, reading books is by far the most efficient way to generate such a comprehension.

Firstly, since a very long time, people have used books to record, describe and explain their experiences. These experiences, embracing our history, have given people the basis to advance and build on an established fundament of knowledge, without the need to re-discover areas, which previous generations have already documented. Furthermore, perceived as a true heritage, books are the only source of data concerning historical events and happenings.

Additionally, the nature of books and their physical representation as group of pages coupled together implies a very easy way of archiving and, thus enabling an easiness of preservation for the future. In ancient Egypt, for example, people used an early form of a book, papyrus, to write down facts of their life’s, which nowadays represent the only existing artifacts of their civilization. This is inevitably, a true example of how early cultures utilized the enormous benefits which books give.

Finally, I believe that books are also perceived from people as a romantic way of acquiring knowledge. Truly, it’s not only the knowledge, which reading a book can bring, perhaps it is the feeling, the touch and the smell, all parts of the unique experience one reader receives while going through a nicely written novel, for example.

In conclusion, I honestly believe that books are an essential and desirable source of information in comparison to life experiences. Unquestionably, both are great ways to gain information about life and the surrounding world, but, after all, only a book could open a door to unlimited knowledge, imagination and creativity.
Joined: 26 Jan 2014
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Re: Please rate my essay (day 1) [#permalink] New post 30 Jan 2014, 01:52
here is another one I wrote for 25 mins.

Nowadays, food has become easier to prepare. Has this change improved the way people live? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Food has always been one of the most important survival factors for humans. Since the first day of the human civilization food is the main resource needed in order to guarantee existence. The way we look at food, however, has changed dramatically since the last decade. Although food is now easily accessible by everyone, in my opinion, the quality of it has severely worsened.

Firstly, in the last fifty years, people have been forced to let go of their healthy meals in favor of the fast food. Fast food is the name of the newly established chains such as McDonalds and KFC offering meals at good price with undoubted negative health effects. Fast food is mainly made by conserved meat, sweet bread and genetically modified potatoes. No matter how affordable this food is, the health complications in the long-term have been reported to range from heart attacks, strokes and even cancer.

Secondly, food has always been connected with the social well-being of people. For instance, enjoying a nice dinner with few fellows at a restaurant can provide a stress free environment, which can help individuals to recover after work. Today, this social aspect of food has now has changed as people always in a hurry, which forces them to eat fast food rather than enjoying a healthy meal at a restaurant.

Thirdly and most importantly, food is being prepared easily nowadays, but due to this fact the quality has suffered a lot. The food industry is focused on utilizing all available resources by using many kinds of chemicals and genetically modified ingredients, hoping to generate as much profit as possible. Surely, companies need to be focused on making a profit. However, the health implications to people might cause bigger expenditures in the long-term.

In conclusion, food has definitely become easier to prepare, but coupled with our fast-going lives this exposes us to unhealthy habits and, unfortunately, in exponential growth of serious diseases.
Joined: 19 Oct 2012
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Re: Please rate my essay (day 1) [#permalink] New post 07 Mar 2014, 13:40
Hey dimovsky88!
Thanks for your essays! I will definetely analyze and use some key words among them!
Did you take TOEFL exam? What is you overall score and writing score?
Re: Please rate my essay (day 1)   [#permalink] 07 Mar 2014, 13:40
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