Another good essay, although I'll say that your Issue essay is stronger than your Argument. This one's probably a 4-4.5. I really like:
-The quality of your thoughts about the argument's weaknesses
-The clear structure you've set up to designate an intro, conclusion, and three body paragraphs
On this one, however, I think the writing is choppy enough to detract from the "readability". One thing I notice throughout this essay (and a little bit in the other, but not nearly as much ) is that you're missing articles like "a", "the", etc. to separate out nouns. For example, your first body paragraph says:
Argument claims that...
It should be:
"The argument claims that..."
a little thing, but since you do that throughout I think they'd have to dock you for it as it doesn't show "superior command" of the language and it contains enough grammatical mistakes to detract a bit from the overall quality of your ideas.
Honestly, other than the choppy nature of the writing - and please don't take that as a criticism but more as a comment...I couldn't write nearly as well in any other language than English! - your ideas and structure are great. This is a strong essay, and I hope that you can polish the grammar enough to really make it shine to the reader.
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