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Pleaze review my essay :)

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Pleaze review my essay :) [#permalink] New post 13 Mar 2014, 04:01
1/Topic: Do u agree or disagree? Some people say that internet provide a lot of valuable information. Others think access to so much information creates problem. Which view you agree with?


When i was 10 years old, i had an opportunity to use a computer which gift from my father. It was a great experience and one where I learn many interesting things on the internet. However, my study became lower on the same time, i spent too much time to use the computer and receive unsuitable information on the internet. I provide two reasons for why i agree with information on the internet create problems.

First of all, internet addiction is the worst problem. Nowadays, children and adults spend many times to stay at their computer to play games, read comics, surf web and they do not take part in outside activities, such as: sports, talk shows or meet friends. For example: In 3 years ago, my friend was the best student in my high school. When internet became popular in my area, he begun to go to school late and his grade was lower. Because of spending many times for information on the internet, he gave up his study. Although internet gives us a lot of necessary information, it can cause problems for us if we addict to it.

Secondly, information on the internet can create bad effects to children. Internet includes huge information from over the world and most of the information is not censored. Moreover many kind of news which appear on the internet as sex, violent and maybe racism. Children can be negative affected if they access to websites which contain these data. For example, about 6 months ago, i read news on BBC, a teenager boys shot his brother after an argument. According to the next reports, investigators found out boy who addicts to a violent comics on website and he shot his brother as characters in books. Information on the internet wills not bad if it is controlled.

In conclusion, information on the internet creates problems for users. The main reasons of it is that there can cause internet addiction for young people. Besides, bad contents and news give negative effects, especially for children.




2/Topic: Do u agree or disagree? Some people say that internet provide a lot of valuable information. Others think access to so much information creates problem. Which view you agree with?



When i was 10 years old, i had an opportunity to use a computer which gift from my father. It was a great experience and one where I learn many interesting things on the internet. However, my study became lower on the same time, i spent too much time to use the computer and receive unsuitable information on the internet. I provide two reasons for why i agree with information on the internet create problems.

First of all, internet addiction is the worst problem. Nowadays, children and adults spend many times to stay at their computer to play games, read comics, surf web and they do not take part in outside activities, such as: sports, talk shows or meet friends. For example: In 3 years ago, my friend was the best student in my high school. When internet became popular in my area, he begun to go to school late and his grade was lower. Because of spending many times for information on the internet, he gave up his study. Although internet gives us a lot of necessary information, it can cause problems for us if we addict to it.

Secondly, information on the internet can create bad effects to children. Internet includes huge information from over the world and most of the information is not censored. Moreover many kind of news which appear on the internet as sex, violent and maybe racism. Children can be negative affected if they access to websites which contain these data. For example, about 6 months ago, i read news on BBC, a teenager boys shot his brother after an argument. According to the next reports, investigators found out boy who addicts to a violent comics on website and he shot his brother as characters in books. Information on the internet wills not bad if it is controlled.

In conclusion, information on the internet creates problems for users. The main reasons of it is that there can cause internet addiction for young people. Besides, bad contents and news give negative effects, especially for children.
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Re: Pleaze review my essay :) [#permalink] New post 13 Mar 2014, 04:04
3/Do u agree or disagree: The extended family ( grandparents, uncle, cousins) is less important now than it was in the past

I was born in a family which has many members. From a child to adult, i grew with my brothers and cousins in loves from parents, grandparents and uncles. Family gives me good education, love and helpful advises when i have many hard problems. I disagree with the following statement and provide two main reasons to explain.

First of all, the most important thing i received from my family is good education. Parents are persons who teach us the first step and others member in family help us the next steps. When parents are not usually stay at home, grandparents are person who care and teach us. Moreover, we can receive a lot of helpful advices and experiment in study from our cousins as major, school schedule and extracurricular activities. For example: In three years ago, when i became a university alumnus, i was stressful and worry about many things. Because college environment were different from studying at high school, i was became independent and had more times. My grade was lower because i do not know control my time efficiently. My aunt helped me (sap pep) my curriculum and gave me a lot of useful experiment. Therefore, my grade was improved better than before.

Second, members in family provide us a lot of helps on difficult times. We can share our emotions and reveal secrets with grandparents or cousins who person we can believe. No-one know exactly time when we can be sick, so members in family will care us on that time. For example: in a month ago, i have a business project about opening technology shop but i do not have enough money to do this plan. My uncle resolved my problem by supporting me a large money to complete my dream.

In conclusion, the extended family is also the important part in today, we can receive useful advises and experiment for life and work. Besides, when we had dangerous and difficult problems, members in family could help us resolve those things.


4/Do u agree or disagree: The extended family ( grandparents, uncle, cousins) is less important now than it was in the past

I was born in a family which has many members. From a child to adult, i grew with my brothers and cousins in loves from parents, grandparents and uncles. Family gives me good education, love and helpful advises when i have many hard problems. I disagree with the following statement and provide two main reasons to explain.

First of all, the most important thing i received from my family is good education. Parents are persons who teach us the first step and others member in family help us the next steps. When parents are not usually stay at home, grandparents are person who care and teach us. Moreover, we can receive a lot of helpful advices and experiment in study from our cousins as major, school schedule and extracurricular activities. For example: In three years ago, when i became a university alumnus, i was stressful and worry about many things. Because college environment were different from studying at high school, i was became independent and had more times. My grade was lower because i do not know control my time efficiently. My aunt helped me (sap pep) my curriculum and gave me a lot of useful experiment. Therefore, my grade was improved better than before.

Second, members in family provide us a lot of helps on difficult times. We can share our emotions and reveal secrets with grandparents or cousins who person we can believe. No-one know exactly time when we can be sick, so members in family will care us on that time. For example: in a month ago, i have a business project about opening technology shop but i do not have enough money to do this plan. My uncle resolved my problem by supporting me a large money to complete my dream.

In conclusion, the extended family is also the important part in today, we can receive useful advises and experiment for life and work. Besides, when we had dangerous and difficult problems, members in family could help us resolve those things.
Re: Pleaze review my essay :)   [#permalink] 13 Mar 2014, 04:04
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