Hey, aimkp:
I'll take the bait! Here's what I saw in your essay:
1) Organization - terrific. It was very clear what each paragraph was intended to do and you had a clear introduction and conclusion. Very nicely done. One quick nitpick - when you use "the other" reason in paragraph 3, you should say "another", because "the other" only holds when there are exactly two items.
2) Support - I think your second support paragraph is the strongest and very well put together; the third is a good point but maybe not articulated as well as it could have been. It took me a couple of reads to get your point, which is essentially that "the author assumes that it was merely experience, and not the presence of other external factors, that led to the reduction of costs in the film industry".
Your first point...I see where you're going but it wasn't as clear as it probably need to be for your essay to garner a 5 or 6. You'd probably need to rephrase toward something like "the author assumes that experience will always directly lead to success, but this requires that the industry and its conditions stay the same, or at least similar..."
3) Style & conventions of grammar
Like I said above, your thought process is great, but it's not articulated perfectly enough to be crystal clear and that detracts a bit. This essay is still probably a 4.5, but I might suggest that you spend an extra few seconds to better articulate the topic sentence of each paragraph to make sure that the reader gets to synthesize the value of your organization and your logic.
Structurally, this is terrific...I'd just make sure that you take close to the full allotted time to be sure that you're articulating things as best you can. Nice job!
_________________
Brian
Veritas Prep | GMAT Instructor
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