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FROM myEssayReview Blog: MBA Résumé – Mistakes You Can Avoid |
Résumé is a critical part of the MBA applications, yet it is often the most neglected one. Your résumé demands as much of your attention as your essays do. In fact, résumé is your first introduction to the Ad Com, so it should be impactful enough to make them want to know more about you through your essays. When working with applicants on their résumés, I often quote Ross Admission Director Soojin Kwon. “For me, the résumé is just as important as your essays…….How you describe your experience matters. What you choose to highlight matters. Think of it as trailer of the movie about you. It needs to show there is substance there. I find that many applicants don’t take enough care with their resumes,” Kwon said. The analogy is so apt. If your essays show a movie about you, your resume shows the trailer of that movie. True!! Your resume is a trailer of your career progression, accomplishments, leadership and team working skills, your interests, and extra-curricular activities that will be shown in detail in the movie of your essays. Therefore, in order to make a good ‘first impression’, you need to invest your time and effort to make your résumé strong and impactful. You can build a strong résumé by avoiding the following most common errors. 1. Lengthy Résumé: First, resist the temptation of writing a lengthy resume. It’s about quality, not quantity, so make sure not to go over one page limit. Most schools want to see only one page résumés. Let your résumé be short and sweet The resume should be the shortest document in your application but the most impactful one that provides an overview of not only your professional career and accomplishments, but also your interest and extra- curricular activities. Please use 10 or 11 font and do not try to squeeze in loads of information by using 8 font. 2. Omitting dates: When listing job positions, sometimes applicants forget to mention employment dates. Without specific dates, the Ad Com will not be able to garner your career progression and your promotions. 3. Writing Sentences/ Paragraphs: Please do not write sentences or paragraphs even if you have a lot of information to convey. Instead use billeted points. Each bullet should be limited to two lines of text, and there should be no more than five bullets per job position. You may use 2 bullet points for listing job responsibilities and 2-3 for job accomplishments. 4. Use of Fancy Fonts: Typical fonts for a resume are Times New Roman, Verdana, Cambria and Arial, with Times New Roman being the most common. The business résumé is not the place to use fancy fonts. So don’t use crazy fonts or intricate borders. 5. Use of Jargon: One of the most common mistakes applicants make is using technical terms of their industry. Do not assume that Ad Com will understand your industry jargon. This is not a job resume that you are writing for your prospective employer. This is your MBA resume that is scanned by the Ad Com of business schools for career progression, leadership qualities, team- working skills, initiative and other interests/activities of future business leaders. So make sure to make your résumé jargon free. The following example is jargon free: Example:
Example:
8. Lack of Quantifiable Accomplishments: Résumés that do not quantify the outcome of your accomplishments fail to make an impression. So please make sure to quantify your impact on your company/organization with measurable results or achievements. Try to provide specific details such as:
10. Omitting extracurricular activities/ interest: Sometimes the applicants get so involved in the details of their professional experience that they tend to ignore extracurricular activities/community service and other interests/ hobbies. Please note that the schools are looking for well-rounded individuals, and not only professionals who have no interests beyond their work. So do not hesitate to include 2-3 hobbies that you feel passionate about and pursue in your non-work hours. Please do not include too many hobbies or interests. Also, include community service activities you have been involved in. 11. Beginning with Education Section: Beginning with the educations section is one of the most common mistakes the applicants make. Please place your education section after professional career section and keep it short. It should show the schools you have attended,the areas of study, and accomplishments/ranking etc. 12. Additional Information /Skills: If you have some certificates or awards, if you have learned some foreign languages, or if you possess advanced computer skills, you may use this section for this information. Also, if you have a long list of awards/ honors, you may create a separate section of ‘Awards and Honors’ to include that information. 13. Providing Personal information: Please do not provide your height, weight, date of birth, and marital status on your résumé. Also, there is no need to provide your picture on your résumé. 14. List of References: An MBA résumé is not a place for providing references. So do not use precious space in providing references or even mentioning ‘References on request’. Lastly, and most importantly, edit and proofread your resume multiple times before you submit it. You do not want to ruin your first impression by careless spelling, grammar, and style errors. Get it reviewed by a second a pair of eyes to ensure consistency and accuracy. |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: GMAT vs Admissions | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
After taking their GMAT, a number of students are confused as to which school they should apply to. They often come up with the questions such “ I have GMAT of XXX. ‘What are my chances of admission?’ or ‘Which school I should apply to?’ Although answers to these questions depend on a variety of other factors ( your goals, work experience, accomplishments, leadership stories, skills etc.), it is an undeniable fact that a strong application package ( résumé, essays, recommendation letters ) plays a critical role in showcasing your candidacy and thereby determining your chances of success to any school. Hence, I have compiled a list of schools where my students have been admitted to. The following list can help you understand the role that a good application plays in getting you scholarships (and not just admission). Also, it will assist you in narrowing down the list of schools that you think is feasible, given your GMAT score. While the following list is not comprehensive, it gives you an idea of what is feasible. For example, even with a GMAT score of 660, a great application package can help you get into top schools such as Kellogg, Booth etc.
To know more, schedule a free consultation -poonam@myessayreview.com (limited slots every week). |
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FROM myEssayReview Blog: Getting Ready for Fall |
With almost all Round 3 applications submitted, it is that time of the year when I revel in the success of my students who so enthusiastically have shared with me the news of their success. Also, it’s time to begin preparing myself for the next application season. As I take this year’s case studies with me into the next application season and build on those, I would also like for you to gear up for the Fall. We all know that MBA application process is a time -consuming and challenging journey. If you are planning to apply in Round 1, NOW is the time to begin this journey. By planning ahead and starting early, you can make this process not only rewarding but enjoyable as well. You will thank yourself later for starting early. Here is the step by step plan you can follow before the schools begin releasing their questions in June/July. 1. Conquer the GMAT: First and foremost, get this biggest hurdle in your journey out of your way. GMAT is the biggest parameter you will need for making a list of your target schools. Most of you must already be preparing for it, and this sure will make your life easier later. For example, if you take your GMAT now, and do not get your desired score, you still have time to retake it before you begin focusing on other parts of the application package (school selection, resume, essays, and recommendation letters). Tackling both GMAT preparation and essays, recommendation letters, resumes with deadlines drawing close, and that too with the work pressure hanging like Damocles sword on your head, will put you under tremendous pressure, making it extremely challenging for you to produce quality work. Currently, I am working with a candidate who is simultaneously working on essays as well GMAT prep, along with his professional commitments. Obviously, he is not able to give his hundred percent to essays and requires frequent ‘wake-up calls’ from me for emailing me updated drafts of his essays. By planning ahead and allowing yourself sufficient time, you can avoid this unnecessary stress. 2. Begin Your School Selection Process: You have got the GMAT out of your way by earning your desired score. Now begin researching your target schools. With proper planning, research and initiative, you can definitely pick out schools that will align with your credentials and aspirations. For school selection, you will have to consider many factors e.g. geographical location, loans, scholarships, key projects/courses, employment reports, and companies that are regular recruiters over the years. You should keep in mind the following criteria during your school selection process. Ø Look at MBA rankings: Based on your profile (work experience, industry, GMAT, goals, interests etc.), you should look at MBA rankings (US News, Financial Times, Business Week, etc.). This will give you some understanding of a group of programs that are strong in your field and where you are also competitive. Also, you will be able to categorize them into dream schools, reach schools and safety schools. Ø Find your ‘Fit’: Do your research and decide on which schools are the best ‘fit’ for your credentials and aspirations. You should research faculty, curriculum, student groups, clubs, and organizations that match your interests and goals. You may also try to read everything published by the schools. Try to find answers to the questions: “Will this school help me meet my objectives (in the areas of education, networking, and career)?” “What will I contribute to the school community?” “Will I be a good ‘fit’ for this school?” and so on. Based on this research, you should be able to shortlist some schools. Ø Talk to Alumni and other experienced people: Along with your research, you should also start reaching out to people with MBA experience: colleagues, friends, current students and alumni, etc. This will help you determine if their perspectives and experiences align with your findings or not. But make sure to talk to multiple Alumni because individual feedback may be biased. You can use the relevant information in your Goals essay and later in the interview to answer the question ‘why our school?’ Ø Visit Schools: Attending MBA fairs, school information sessions, and school visits will provide you relevant information on your shortlisted schools. Attend a class or two, meet with a faculty, talk to students, and take a tour of the campus. In other words, get a feel of the school and see if you want be a part of this community or not. Again, while answering “Why our school?’ part of the Goals essay, you can cite interesting aspects of your visit (e.g. class visit, meeting with faculty, information session etc.) to demonstrate your preference/ interest for this school. Ø Visit Forums: Discussion forums are wonderful platforms where you can post your specific queries about school search or any other question regarding MBA admission process and get expert advice from admission consultants. Also, you can share your views/ experiences with other students who are active on these forums and are also finding their way around like you. I would suggest that you create a separate word document for each shortlisted school and write down the aspects of each school that you like (e.g. specific classes and professors, student groups, companies that recruit there etc.) and how that program will help you reach your career goals. I am sure all this home work will prepare you well and give you enough confidence to finalize your list of 6-7 target schools. 3. Build Your Resume: Now that you are ready with your list of target schools, it’s time to work on constructing your résumé. MBA résumé is very different from a job résumé, so you will need a significant amount of time and effort in building it. MBA résumés are brief and concise stories of your skills, interests, experience and key accomplishments. Here I would like to quote Ross Admission Director Soojin Kwon, “For me, the résumé is just as important as your essays. Think of it as a trailer of the movie about you.” By making an engaging trailer ( résumé ), you are building Ad Com’s interest in your movie ( essays and recommendation letters). 4. Reach out to recommenders : It’s also time to approach your recommenders. If you are applying to many schools, your recommenders will need time to work on those recommendation letters. They are busy people, so you may want to apprise them of this favor you would expect from them in the near future. I would encourage you to request a meeting with each of them to discuss the key themes you would like to showcase in your application. Also, your recommenders need to understand that they will not be using the single template for multiple schools because schools have their own set of questions that they expect the recommenders to answer with specific examples from the applicants’ work life. 5. Brainstorm stories for Essays: After having accomplished all this, you may be wondering “My target schools have still not released essay questions. What do I do now?” Well, before B-school roll out their essay questions, you may begin brainstorming your ideas/stories for essays. Even though B-schools change their essay topics from one year to another, there are going to be concepts that are the same among business schools. For instance, all schools will expect you to write your goals essay, so take your time to identify your short term and long term goals. Make sure your goals are realistic as well as ambitious. Also, start thinking of your greatest leadership experiences, accomplishments, your background, life experiences, your greatest strengths (and weaknesses, too) and how these will help you add value to your target school. Some of the most common themes you can organize your thoughts on are: Ø Why do you want to pursue an MBA? Ø What is your career goal post-MBA? Ø Where do you see yourself 5-10 years from now? Ø How will you contribute to MBA classroom? Ø Why are you interested in the program? Ø What are your biggest accomplishments and why do you view them as such? By establishing your stories in advance, you will already have some raw material in hand which you can develop, edit and tailor to individual essays for specific programs. When the candidates sign up for my services in the summer, I require them to fill out a questionnaire of 25 questions pertaining to their goals, accomplishments, background , cultural experiences, strengths and weaknesses etc., so when the essays come out, we are able to use most of this material for specific essays for their target schools. Thus, by planning ahead, you can make your MBA application process enjoyable and productive. Of course, you can teak the above plan as per your individual needs, circumstances, and preferences; however, the key is to strategize and plan ahead. Good luck J |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: Developing Engaging Stories for Your Essays |
The next application season is fast approaching, and B-school aspirants have already started gearing up for putting together various aspects of their application package. Some of you must be preparing for your GMAT while some must be busy researching schools and reaching out to the alumni/current students to get their perspective on schools. After earning your desired GMAT score and finalizing your list of target schools, the next challenge for you is to develop relevant stories for your essays. When working with the B-school applicants on their application essays in the past three years, I have noticed that one major issue most applicants face with their essays is- coming up with relevant stories/real life examples or inability to present them effectively. Some applicants just expand their resumes and rewrite them in a language that is filled with jargon, assuming everyone would comprehend them, some compose an objective statement of purpose that reads like a newspaper article which completely fails to tell the reader who they are, while some others try so hard to impress the Ad Com with their language skills that the essence of the story is lost somewhere in the maze of those ‘robust’ words. Indeed, the stories you tell about various aspects of your professional career (goals, accomplishments, leadership experiences etc.) and personal life (background, cultural experiences, setback/mistake etc.) play a key role in determining your chances of admission to you dream school. Therefore, you must invest a significant amount of time in reflecting on your best stories and then developing them into engaging and persuasive essays that will set you apart from a gigantic pool of applicants. You can master this skill if you keep in mind some key components of the story development process. Starting this week, myEssayReview will be providing one “tip” every week to guide you through this process. Week #1 Comprehend the Essay Prompt Understanding the essay prompt is the first step towards tailoring your story to a particular essay question. Read the essay prompt carefully and try to gauge what the school wants to know through this question. Without understanding the intent of the essay prompt, your story will go off track and will fail to convey the intended message. For example, if the essay question is about the contribution to the XYZ School, do not discuss your reasons for choosing that particular B-school. They are not asking you about their particular resources that interest you; rather they want to know in what ways they would benefit by accepting you. While elaborating what value you will add to your target school, make sure you connect your skill-set, your professional and personal attributes and your experiences to the specific resources (clubs, organizations, team groups etc.) of your target school. To cite another example, let’s take a look at the first job essay question of INSEAD. “Briefly summarize your current (or most recent) job, including the nature of work, major responsibilities, and where relevant, employees under your supervision, size of budget, clients/products and results achieved. (350 words maximum)” This job essay question does not require you to share your accomplishment story at your current job, the challenges you faced and the actions you took to achieve the desired results. (one of the applicants I am currently working with made exactly the same mistake in his first draft). Please note that the essay prompt requests a snapshot of your career at present. Keeping in mind that this will be the Ad Com’s introduction to your materials, you might also provide the reader the context necessary to understand your place within the organizational structure and the work that occupies your days. I would encourage you to stay focused on the details of your present job and avoid drifting away to your greatest achievements. You will get an opportunity to do that in Motivation Essay question #2. For questions, email me at poonam@myessayreview.com Stay tuned to the next step/tip in this process next week. |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: Developing Engaging Stories for MBA Essays – Tip # 2 |
Brainstorm Ideas/Stories Last week, I had discussed the first step in the process of developing engaging and compelling stories for MBA essays i.e. Comprehend the Essay Prompt. Once you get an understanding of what the question expects you to discuss, begin brainstorming ideas / stories to be able to address that prompt appropriately. You will have to do a lot of soul searching to identify the right stories. There are many pre-writing techniques that you may use to generate ideas:
Begin Writing Once you have gathered your ideas/ stories on paper, mull over them to make sure that you chose the right story to address the essay prompt. Then go on to flesh out the details, organize, and arrange them. At this stage, don’t think about word-count, grammar, spelling, and punctuation. You want to make sure that your story has all the information that the reader needs to know to understand your story. Try to include all the relevant details that would make complete sense to the reader. Do not assume the readers (in this case the Ad Com) would know what has not been relayed to them. When I point out the lack of relevant details in my first critique/ edit, I hear the same response from almost all of my students, “I had many ideas in mind, but I did not pen them down because of the word limit.” And my standard response to all of them is “At this stage of the writing process, you don’t want the word count specifications to restrict the writer in you. Right now, the intent is to first get all the components of the story down on paper and then organize them well. We will take care of the word limits at a later stage.” In the past, this structured approach has worked for me as an English teacher, and now it is working for me as a consultant. I use the first couple of edits to get the right content for typical themes (goals, leadership, setback, culture, accomplishments etc.) and the last couple of edits to make the essays comply with the word count limits and proofread them for grammar, sentence structure, spelling, and punctuation errors. Whether you are working on your essays by yourself or you have partnered with a consultant, you may try this technique. I am confident that you will find this extremely helpful. Next week, I will come back with tip # 3 of the story development process. Stay Tuned. For more MBA articles, visit myEssayReview blog. For questions, email me at poonam@myessayreview.com |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: Developing Engaging Stories for MBA Essays – Week # 2 – Tip # 2 |
Brainstorm Ideas/Stories Last week, I had discussed the first step in the process of developing engaging and compelling stories for MBA essays i.e. Comprehend the Essay Prompt. Once you get an understanding of what the question expects you to discuss, begin brainstorming ideas / stories to be able to address that prompt appropriately. You will have to do a lot of soul searching to identify the right stories. There are many pre-writing techniques that you may use to generate ideas:
Begin Writing Once you have gathered your ideas/ stories on paper, mull over them to make sure that you chose the right story to address the essay prompt. Then go on to flesh out the details, organize, and arrange them. At this stage, don’t think about word-count, grammar, spelling, and punctuation. You want to make sure that your story has all the information that the reader needs to know to understand your story. Try to include all the relevant details that would make complete sense to the reader. Do not assume the readers (in this case the Ad Com) would know what has not been relayed to them. When I point out the lack of relevant details in my first critique/ edit, I hear the same response from almost all of my students, “I had many ideas in mind, but I did not pen them down because of the word limit.” And my standard response to all of them is “At this stage of the writing process, you don’t want the word count specifications to restrict the writer in you. Right now, the intent is to first get all the components of the story down on paper and then organize them well. We will take care of the word limits at a later stage.” In the past, this structured approach had worked for me as an English teacher, and now it is working for me as a consultant. I use the first couple of edits to get the right content for typical themes (goals, leadership, setback, culture, accomplishments etc.) and the last couple of edits to make the essays comply with the word count limits and proofread them for grammar, sentence structure, spelling, and punctuation errors. Whether you are working on your essays by yourself or you have partnered with a consultant, you may try this technique. I am confident that you will find this extremely helpful. Next week, I will come back with tip # 3 of the story development process. Stay Tuned. For more MBA articles, visit myEssayReview blog. For questions, email me at poonam@myessayreview.com |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: Developing Engaging Stories for MBA Essays – Week # 3 -Tip # 3 |
In the past two weeks, I have discussed the first three important steps in the process of developing engaging stories for MBA essays: 1. comprehending the essay prompt, 2. brainstorming/gathering ideas for the essay prompt, and 3. putting down those ideas on paper. Now let’s discuss one of the key components during this ‘writing’ stage:’ Address Each Part of the Essay Question Often the essay questions consist of 2 or 3 parts, but sometimes, the candidates tend to ignore the second or third part of the essay question and delve into depth addressing only the first part of the question. There is a reason why a particular school is asking 3 questions in one essay prompt – they are seeking to evaluate certain attributes in their prospective candidates through their response to that part of the essay prompt. Hence your goal should be to pay equal attention to all those aspects. In order to address the essay question holistically, you may break it down into multiple sub-segments and then build a structure around each sub segment. Example # 1: Let us look at INSEAD’s motivation essay #1: Give a candid description of yourself (who are you as a person), stressing the personal characteristics you feel to be your strengths and weaknesses and the main factors which have influenced your personal development, giving examples when necessary. (600 words max). This essay prompt requires you to discuss two things: 1. your strengths and weaknesses, and 2. the factors (events, people, and your background) that have contributed to your personal development. In order to make sure that you address both sections effectively, you may break it down into two parts, and then describe the first part (your strengths and weaknesses) in approximately 300 words and the second part (factors that have influenced your personality) in approximately 300 words. When discussing your strengths and weakness, do not forget to substantiate them by real life examples. Also, explain what you have learned from your mistakes and how you have applied those lessons in your personal/ professional life. Example # 2: Let us take a look at Ross’s question about frustration at work place: Describe time in your career when you were frustrated or disappointed. What advice would you give to a colleague who was dealing with a similar situation? (400 word maximum) In addition to providing all the details of the time when you faced disappointment or frustration in your professional life , (the reasons of frustration, your reaction, thought process etc.), you should also share what advice you would give to your colleague who was dealing with the same situation. For this, you should think carefully about the lessons you learned from that experience and how you are applying those learnings successfully in your professional life. I would give approximately 330-340 words to the first part of the question and 60-70 words to the second part of the essay question. Stay Tuned to tip# 4 of the story development process next week J For questions, email me at poonam@myessayreview.com |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: Developing Engaging Stories for MBA Essays Week # 4 – Tip # 4 |
Make your Introduction Compelling The beginning of your essay must attract the reader’s attention and make them want to keep reading your essay. The Ad Com have to review thousands of essays, and they don’t have more than a couple of minutes for each essay, so you want to make the first few sentences interesting to engage them into your story. First impressions are always said to be the lasting ones. Right ? You may make your beginning compelling in a variety of ways: a thought, a question, a dialogue or a brief anecdote. Let’s take a look at the following two examples: Not so good Example: A primary consideration that urged me to explore the horizons beyond a promising position as a consultant was my yearning to design, develop and market a new product. In the above example, the author begins with his passion to design, develop and market a new product. However, he is able to hook the reader into his story when he retells his story by providing an example of his entrepreneurial passion dating back his teenage years. Good Example: I could fix a motorbike before I could ride one. By the age of 15, I had built myself a small garage, fixing, painting and washing bikes for anyone that would pay anything. Twelve years later, despite the hefty schedule that accompanies a financial consultant, I was not willing to bury my entrepreneurial enthusiasm. Take a look at some more examples of effective introductions from essays that have worked for the top B-schools. Example # 2 (Goals Essay) Mathematics problems and Sherlock Holmes mysteries have interested me since childhood. Managing my college’s tech-fest familiarized me with my ability to collaborate well with people, leading me to a career in consulting. Example # 3 (Background Essay) Raised in a middle class family, I, along with my sister, grew up on the principle-“Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high” – a popular poem of Nobel Laureate Rabindranath Tagore. My parents worked hard to make us confident, empathetic, hard-working individuals who not only stand at their own feet but also stand for others. Example # 4 (Challenge Essay) “Don’t try to re-invent the wheel.” said my colleague, Deepak after I showed our team of 6 IT professionals my solution for a framework for XXX (name of the company) enterprise applications. The solution was a re-engineered process to build a framework for the foundation services for the XXX enterprise applications that is the heart of our client’s $30 Billion multi-industry business. Example # 5 (Leadership Essay) Growing up, I have lived in three different continents: Asia, Europe, and America. My unique circumstances have shaped me into the person I am today. The qualities I have gained thus far will allow me to contribute and make a lasting impact on the Goizueta community. Example # 6 (Culture Essay) Despite working with US clients for 3 years from offshore location, I was not familiar with the cultural aspect of the US until I moved to the US in 2010. My new colleagues, most of them Americans, befriended me and helped me adjust to the work environment. Nevertheless, many facets of American culture took me by surprise in the initial few months. The above introductions provide background information, set a tone for the rest of the essay, and draw the reader into further details of the applicants’ story. Stay Tuned for Tip# 5 of the story development process next week J For questions, email me at poonam@myessayreview.com |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: Developing Engaging Stories for MBA Essays – Week # 5- Tip # 5 |
Organize Your Story Well Proper structure is a key component of effective essays. It is glue that blends together all the pieces of your story. Whether you are narrating your cultural experience, setback or ethical dilemma experience or are discussing your career progression story leading to your goals and accomplishments, your story should contain proper beginning, middle, and end. All the details of your story should flow so well that it is not only comprehensible but compelling as well. Keeping the following points in mind will help you organize your story well. 1. Do not leave any loose ends: You are the author of your story, so in order to make a lasting impact on the reader, you should make sure to explain each logical step of your story without leaving any loose ends. Remember, you are not writing a suspense story that would force the reader to make speculations about the details. You are writing an admission essay and its purpose is to provide the Ad Com an understanding of your professional and personal experiences/ accomplishments to help them determine if you are a good fit for that particular school or not. Also, your essay is one of the thousands of other essays that will be evaluated by the Ad Com, and they obviously don’t have time to fill out the missing pieces of your story. So your goal should be to present your story in a succinct and concise manner so it sticks in the mind of the reader. Let’s look at the examples below: Bad Example: In the autumn of 2008, overlooking high-rise buildings in Tokyo from my office windows, I was deeply troubled. Two years earlier, shortly after our successful IPO, I moved back to Japan with a mission to establish Asian operation out of Tokyo. What started out, as a one-person operation from my own bedroom, became the largest market on revenue after 2 years with 25 full time employees. In the above example, the writer begins with an announcement of his troubled state of mind while he stood near his office window. He hooks the reader into his story with his first sentence. However, he immediately goes into flashback and begins providing lengthy details that keeps the reader speculating, rather wondering about the cause of his worry. Also, he doesn’t provide any info about the country he moved back from. Now let’s look at the later and revised version of the same paragraph. Good Example: In 2006, shortly after our successful IPO, I relocated back to Japan from Norway with a mission to establish Asian operation out of Tokyo. I joined the local company Opera Software as a one-person operation from my own bedroom, and it became the largest revenue source for Opera Software after only two years from its start with 25 full time employees. 2. Specify time: When reading a novel, we always want to have a sense of the setting: time and place, as these are the essential components required for appreciating or evaluating the story. Similarly, when sharing your stories (setback, mistake, culture, background, accomplishment or ethical dilemma etc.), make sure to specify the time of the incident. Not so Good Example: When I look back, my frustration period in my career was most recent. I was assigned as a Team lead for a large technical team to handle a challenging project. Good Example: In October 2013, I was assigned as a Team lead for a large technical team to handle a challenging project. The only difference between the first and the second example is specification of time which tells the reader how recent the story is. 3. Include your thought process: Another vital component that you should keep in mind while organizing your essay is: your thought process. When writing leadership/ team work essays or self-revelation essays (failure/mistake, culture shock, setback, strength and weakness, ethical dilemma etc.) don’t forget to share what was going on in your mind at that time. It is not enough to describe what you did, it is also important to explain how you felt when you found yourself in a particular situation. This will allow your readers to relate to the situation, providing them with insight into your thought process. Through these questions, B-schools want to know how you process your thoughts, how you navigate through the situations, how you take important decisions, and how you finally translate them into action. Let’s look at the following examples: Not so Good Example: I was in a dilemma whether to approach the manager to discuss the issue or to approach the interim finance manager who had approved these bills. The interim finance manager was a very good friend of mine; therefore, I did not want to act in haste and reach a wrong conclusion. Good Example: I was in a dilemma whether to approach the manager to discuss the issue or to approach the interim finance manager who had approved these bills. The interim finance manager was a very good friend of mine; therefore, I did not want to act in haste and reach a wrong conclusion. I had many thoughts going through my mind. “How do I handle the situation so nobody gets hurt?” “What should I choose – friendship or duty?” “What will happen if I go wrong somewhere?” Notice how the inclusion of the writer’s thought process in the second example makes it more impactful. Thus, you can build sound structure of your story by including all the relevant details that tie together your beginning, middle, and end. Also, don’t forget to obtain a second perspective by getting your essay reviewed by a friend. Stay Tuned for Tip # 6 of the story development process next week J For questions, email me at poonam@myessayreview.com |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: Developing Engaging Stories for MBA Essays- Week # 6- Tip # 6 |
Do Not Use Jargon It has been a common experience for me to review essays filled with technical terms of the applicant’s industry. Whether it is ‘leadership’ essay, ‘setback’ essay, ‘goals’ essay, ‘ethical dilemma’ or even ‘background’ essay, some applicants inadvertently provide lengthy technical details which are comprehensible only to their industry people. In their enthusiasm to showcase their technical expertise, they often omit relevant information (e.g. ‘What were the main challenges?’ “How did they deal with the situation?’ or ‘How was the experience meaningful?’ etc.). The use of excessive jargon makes it challenging for the readers to comprehend your story and distracts them from the ‘real story’. In order to create effective essays, you should aim at using only as much jargon as is required to convey your story. Let’s look the following example from the ‘teamwork/challenge’ essay for Schulich: Bad Example: In October, we got the first sampling. It worked fine without leakage, but the assembly manager complained the bailer was difficult to assemble because the washer did not quite fit with the opening. Although he was sure about the 0.5 mm difference during the meeting, there was still a gap between assumption and reality. In order to save the tooling cost and time, I did not ask for tooling amending of the washer, but asked Mr. Liu to decrease the hardness of the washer by 10 degrees and send me a washer sample immediately. The sample came two days later, and the assembly manager was satisfied with it. It also passed the water leakage test. Since the sample was ready much earlier than METS, we sent it by FedEx to Lindemann for test and got the sample approval during the meeting with Lindemann at the international METS.. Here is the revised version from the essay that was ‘accepted.’ Good Example: Finally, in mid-October, we got the first sample; however, the assembly manager found it difficult to assemble. A tooling amending might have solved this problem, but it would have taken time and the second sample might be worse. I certainly could not afford time for failures. So in order to save time, instead of inquiring tooling amending, I substituted a softer washer from the supplier which satisfied the manager. Thus, in spite of all the issues, the sample was ready much earlier than the METS (Marine Equipment Trade Show). Now look at the following example from ‘Why MBA’ essay for Kellogg and notice the jargon used by the writer. Bad Example: I am currently working on a project to leverage historical buying data of the 4 largest advertising holding companies in the world to forecast pricing of online media inventory and provide valuable insights to the media buyer during negotiation with publishers. The results of this project could have huge implications on how the inventory is priced in the digital marketplace, providing the holding companies with a tool to truly unlock the value of their data. Right now, different operational workflows, absence of standards and fragmentation of data prevent most of the holding companies in the advertising industry to get the true value of scale. My experience of providing solutions to such industry issues will complement the academic knowledge that I will gain through the part time MBA program at Kellogg and will accelerate my career growth. Here is the revised version minus technical details. And yes, it was accepted: Good Example: I am currently working on a project to leverage historical buying data of the 4 largest advertising holding companies in the world to forecast pricing of online media inventory and provide valuable insights to the media buyer during negotiation with publishers. I believe that my experience of providing solutions to such industry issues will complement the academic knowledge that I will gain through the part time MBA program at Kellogg and will thus accelerate my career growth. To sum up, whether you are writing goals essay, accomplishment essay, self-revelation essays (passion, cross cultural, failure/mistake, or ethical dilemma etc.) or leadership/teamwork essays, your objective should be to keep the technical details to the minimum and instead focus on how you dealt with challenges, how you communicated with people, how you processed information, how you made decisions and took actions, and lastly and most importantly, how you grew from your experiences to emerge a better person, personally, and professionally. Stay Tuned for Tip# 7 of the story development process next week J For questions, email me at poonam@myessayreview.com |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: Developing Engaging Stories for MBA Essays- Week # 7-Tip # 7 |
Do Not Use Passive Voice When narrating your personal and professional stories, make sure to be personal. Your experiences and accomplishments, irrespective of how impressive they are, will fail to make an impression on the reader if they are written in passive voice. I often come across essays composed in flawless English, but they still don’t succeed in making the desired impact on the reader. The lack of personal touch in those stories give an impression as if these stories are referring to someone else and not to the candidates themselves. Please remember that your personal stories of goals, accomplishments, challenge, cultural experience, background, setback, leadership etc. need to be made personal. By using passive voice, you will make your own stories so impersonal and lifeless that they will not only weaken your message, but also turn your heroic accomplishments into lackluster ones. Let’s looks at the following examples: Not So Good Example: (‘Accomplishment Essay’-A&M) While the course tests ones physical abilities, the main focus of the course is to assess your mental endurance and ability to make decisions when time matters and thinking is critical. Graduating with honors from one of the most difficult schools, the Marine offers are the standard against which I judge myself when leading others to accomplish team goals no matter the circumstances, signifying the competence and persistence I use today. The above example is not bad, but it is not as effective and personal as the one below. .Here is the revised version . Yes, it was ‘accepted’: Good Example: While the course tested my physical abilities, the main focus of the course was to assess my mental endurance and ability to make decisions when time matters and thinking is critical. I graduated with honors from one of the most difficult schools that signified my competence under pressure. It is the standard against which I judge myself when leading others to accomplish team goals irrespective of the circumstances. Here is another example composed in passive voice: Bad Example (‘Leadership/ Contribution’ essay- MIT): Armed with this data, my client was able to make his case with the support of my analysis to gain the support of other executives. With the advancement of computational power and “big data”, analytics is now an inescapable aspect of current and future business leadership. Leveraging the trend of analytics to prove that a diverse work force can drive efficiencies and hard dollar savings in companies is a way to drive equality in the workplace. The above example is too passive to offer a glimpse into the candidate’s actions. Now let’s look at the final version which is more personal and thus more impactful. And yes, it was ‘accepted’ . Good Example: With the support of my analysis, my client was able to make his case to gain the support of other executives. By leveraging the trend of analytics, I proved that a diverse work force can drive efficiencies and hard dollar savings in companies drive equality in the workplace. Stay Tuned for Tip# 8 of the story development process next week J For more MBA articles, visit myEssayReview blog. For questions, email me at poonam@myessayreview.com |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: UT Austin McCombs Essay Questions Analysis 2014-15 |
Application Deadlines: Round 1 Deadline: October 14, 2014 Notification: December 18, 2014 Round 2 Deadline: January 6, 2015 Notification: March 26, 2015 Round 3 Deadline: March 24, 2015 Notification: May 21, 2015 From Mc Combs website: “Each year, like most business schools, we update our application essay prompts in an effort to better glean important information from our candidates. The essay is a great opportunity to do a few things: one, it shows your writing skills; two, it gives us a glimpse into your personality; but maybe most importantly, it helps answer a few very important questions that we need answered to best determine if you are right for McCombs. Instead of giving you a vague open-ended prompt, there are actually a few burning topics we need you to be sure to cover, namely having to do with why you want to attend McCombs, who you are both professionally and personally, and what goals you want to achieve while in our program and beyond. You have some work to do to convince us that we are the right program for you, therefore please take a moment to review our essay topics and begin to think about how you might approach answering the essay questions.” 1. Imagine that you are at the Texas MBA Orientation for the Class of 2017. Please introduce yourself to your new classmates, and include any personal and/or professional aspects that you believe to be significant. Select only one communication method that you would like to use for your response.
To showcase your creativity, McCombs offers you a choice of 3 modes of communication. If you are an introvert, you may select the ‘essay mode’ for sure. If you have an artistic bent of mind and are good with visuals and graphics, you may pick the https://gmatclub.com/chat option. An https://gmatclub.com/chat profile is simply a written expression about you which also includes visuals, giving you an option to use your creativity to the fullest. If you are an extrovert, you may find the video mode more exciting. A video essay allows applicants not only to be more creative but also imaginative. So you may use your own imagination, focusing more on the things that you like and would want to share. For example, if you plan to share your culinary skills with your class mates, you may consider shooting the one minute video in your kitchen. It is my understanding that a video essays would demand more time than a regular essay. So I would suggest that you experiment with it if you have ample time at your disposal. I am sure it will be fun doing it, but you will need to invest time in it to make it perfect. Also, please note that you have to say it all in just one minute video. You have a choice here, so pick the method you feel most comfortable with. And before you submit your response to this essay have a trusted friend or colleague look it over to let you know if you have effectively crafted a compelling piece. As they say, you only have one chance to make a first impression, so dedicate the work necessary to ensure that your introduction is both engaging and true to who you really are. 2. In the Texas MBA program, we promote a diverse and collaborative community by providing opportunities for growth in an academically rigorous environment. Please discuss why McCombs is the right program for you, what you hope to gain from your time in the Texas MBA Program both personally and professionally, and how you will contribute to your classmates’ experiences. (500 words) McCombs seems to have combined last year’s question# 2 (“Why Texas?” (outside of your professional goals and your contribution 250 words )and question # 3 (your professional and personal reasons for choosing McCombs- 250 words) in to one straightforward question that asks you to highlight your contribution to the Mc Comb’s community and your reasons for choosing the Texas MBA program in 500 words . To address the first part of the question, explain why you wish to pursue MBA and then, why you are choosing McCombs. In particular, reflect on both personal and professional aspects and discuss how various resources at Texas will help you fulfill your personal and professional needs and objectives and would aid in shaping up your future, the way you see it. To compose a solid response to this question, you need to do a thorough research of the resources and offerings of Mc Combs. You may also get in touch with the currents students and alumni to get insider’s perspective on their experience. If possible, visit the campus, attend a class, talk to faculty or other people to get feel of the school’s culture. This will help you determine your ‘fit’ with the school. Please note that McCombs has clearly stated on the website: ”You have some work to do to convince us that we are the right program for you,” Please refer to the following example: Example: “My past experiences, the knowledge gained in the classroom, McComb’s extensive NGO network, and the Net Impact club will equip me with skills to operate an NGO, helping me realize my dream of opening my own NGO.” To address the second part of the question, you should highlight your attributes, your strengths which you would be bringing to the Texas community. Focus on mentioning about your work in two or three clubs and elaborate on that, showing how you think it will groom your personality and how you will bring those traits to the classroom and enrich your class mates’ experience. Now, say, you could talk about your passion for soccer and how you could be an aid to the Soccer Club. Instead of framing your sentence as ‘I like playing soccer and I feel the soccer club would be good for me’, you could say: Example: ‘Having a rich experience of being on the field and being best friends with the ball for more than a decade, I feel I can bring that to the McCombs Soccer Club and lead to the enhancement of the games..’ Lastly and most importantly, do not forget to showcase how you will imbibe the collaborative culture of McCombs and add value to it. Optional Essay: Please provide any additional information to the Admissions Committee that you believe is important and/or will address any areas of concern that will be beneficial to the Admissions Committee in considering your application. (200 words) For example, if your standardized test scores are not exactly what you would like them to be or if you have not had coursework in core business subjects (i.e. calculus, microeconomics, statistics, financial accounting, or finance), please tell us how you plan to prepare yourself for the quantitative rigor of the MBA curriculum. Discuss any unexplained gaps in work experience, choice of recommenders, academic performance, or any significant weaknesses in your application or extenuating personal circumstances that you think may impact your candidacy. For more information, please visit the UT McCombs admissions website. An optional essay is an opportunity for you to give the Ad Com relevant information that you could not provide in other essays or other parts of your application essays, recommendation letters and resume. This question is also meant to shine a spotlight on an experience or side of your personality that has not been revealed in the other parts of your application. To provide context for a weakness in your profile, like low GPA or GMAT or a gap in your job history, make sure your reason is genuine to convince them that your low grades occurred due to unforeseen circumstances beyond your control. Also, keep in mind that your story should not only explain that particular weakness in your profile, but also bring out your other strong personality traits. That means your response should be positive and should not sound like you are making excuses for a weakness in your profile. Below is an example of an optional essay written by a military candidate to explain his low grades: Example: Although my leadership experiences in the military taught me many valuable lessons in teamwork, perseverance, and management, through all my responsibilities, it impacted my grades. Thus, I do not view my undergraduate performance as an accurate representation of my academic abilities. I certainly deserved all the grades I received; I earned them. However, I hope the above reasons will assist you in understanding my particular situation. I grew from this experience and took a dedicated approach to professional education. I would respectfully ask the admission committee consider this when reviewing my application. For more details, refer to my article on optional essay and sample optional essay on MER site. |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: Developing Engaging Stories for MBA Essays Week # 8- Tip # 8 |
Provide Specific Details One of the most common pitfalls of Admission essays is the writers’ inability to use specific examples or details and share stories that are filled with vague generalities. To be able to make sense of your story and appreciate it as well, the reader needs to know the specifics of your story. Please note that the members of the Admission committee have to read hundreds of essays for evaluating candidacy of their prospective students, so if you want your stories to ‘stick’ in their minds, your writing needs to be succinct, articulate, and specific. By providing specific examples/details about ‘what’ ‘why ‘where’ and ‘when’ of your experience and by sharing your thought process at that time, you can turn your stories into memorable essays. Let’s look at some examples to understand how specific details can turn around an essay. Not So Good Example: My family is unique because my parents are spiritual leaders to point me the way to victory. My parents were growing in poor family. They did not have enough resource to chase their dreams. Furthermore, the most important investment is that they made countless sacrifices to foster my growing. The above para fails to resonate with the reader because it does not provide any specifics about the place ( country, city) where the writer lived with his family and why they lacked resources. Now compare it with the revised version: Good Example: Growing up in Shanghai, China, I have seen my parents working double shifts to provide me a better living. I am the only child of my parents. My parents grew up in poor families, so they did not have enough resources to afford college education. However, they made countless sacrifices to foster my growing and build a good life for themselves and for me. Let’s take a look at another example: Not So Good Example: My education, experience and accomplishments till date are in alignment with my vision as I am unique to have a strong academic and professional background. From a young age, I made achievements beyond those of my peers.My consistently best performance in high-school and under-graduation and service in renowned corporations made me stand out from the rest of the crowd.With the perfect combination of strong technical expertise and innovative ideas of an entrepreneur, I can differentiate myself from other consultants. Most of the details in the above example lack specifics about the applicant eg. ‚‘strong academic and professional background‘ ‘achievements beyond peers‘,consistently best performance‘ , renowned corporations‘ etc. Also, the writer boasts of being‘ unique‘ and of being able to differentiate himself from other consultants . I sugegst that you follow the principle of ‘show not tell’ , so your actions and stories will showcase you as a ‘unique candidate’, and you will not need to ‘tell’ about them . That is, your professional career and accomplishments will vouch for you and set you apart from the crowd. Let‘s look at the revised version now. Good Example: My education, experience and accomplishments till date are in alignment with my vision as I have a strong background academically and professionally. I was among the top 2% of the students in high school and under-graduation and one of the nine candidates selected by Infosys from 1000+ candidates. I was also recognized as the “Employee of the Year” and “Best Team Player” during my tenure. The above example provides specific information about the candidate‘s strong academic and professional background,so he/ she doesn’t need to proclaim it any more. To sum up, one for the key components to make your stories compelling is to make sure to be specific about each and every tiny detail of your story. Stay Tuned for Tip # 9 of the story development process next week J For questions, email me at poonam@myessayreview.com |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: Developing Engaging Stories for Your Essays Week # 9- Tip # 9 |
Use Transitional Expressions Last week, we had discussed the use of specific details and examples for making our stories in application essays engaging and persuasive. This week, we will discuss how we can use transitional expressions to make these specific anecdotes/ details cohere and stick together so the reader is able to move smoothly from one bit of information to the other. The use of transition words and phrases not only helps us write clearly and coherently, but also helps our readers (in this case the AD Com) follow our story and stay focused. These transitional expressions act like road signs that help the reader follow the direction of our thought. True, we all are familiar with these most commonplace words and phrases, but we sometimes forget to use them, thereby making our ideas appear disconnected and choppy. Here are some common ones, listed in categories according to their meaning: Addition: also, in addition, too, and, besides, furthermore, next, then, finally Contrast: on the other hand, but, yet, however, nevertheless, in contrast, on the contrary, in contrast, still, at the same time Comparison: in comparison, similarly, likewise, in the same way, in the same manner Result: consequently, so, therefore, thus, due to this, as a result, hence, in conclusion, on the whole, finally Example: for example, for instance, namely, specifically Time: first, second, third, next, then, finally, soon, later, afterwards, during, before, meanwhile, eventually, currently, immediately, in the past, in the future, originally To understand the significance of these simple transitional devices that act like glue to hold the sentences together and lead the reader from one paragraph to another in making our stories coherent, let’s look at the following examples: Bad Example # 1: My job was at stake. I resolved to remain calm, accept the challenge and started pounding my way through in a planned manner. Good Example: My job was at stake. Nevertheless, I resolved to remain calm, accept the challenge and started pounding my way through in a planned manner. Bad Example # 2: I was sent to a regular elementary school in our neighborhood. Regular study was given the utmost importance; my father inculcated in me an interest to love numbers and play around with them. Good Example # 2: I was sent to a regular elementary school in our neighborhood. Apart from giving importance to regular studies at school, my father also inculcated in me an interest to love numbers and play around with them. Bad Example # 3: I consider this my best mistake because this experience taught me valuable lessons early in my career. I learned that it is important to take necessary action to resolve or mitigate the effects of the issue than worrying about the consequences. I learned that mistakes can be turned into opportunities through which something good can be done. Good Example # 3: I consider this my best mistake because this experience taught me valuable lessons early in my career. First, I learned that it is important to take necessary action to resolve or mitigate the effects of the issue than worrying about the consequences. I also learned that those mistakes can be turned into opportunities through which something good can be achieved. As you can see, the addition of just one word in the above examples has articulated the ideas. Transitional expressions not only help in connecting ideas between sentences, but also help smooth transitions between paragraphs. Let’s look at the following example from INSEAD’s essay on ‘extra -professional activities’, where the writer’s description of his third extra- curricular interest is completely disconnected from his previous activity. Bad Example # 4: In 2012, my father who works at Ashalata – an NGO dedicated to assist children with special needs to learn, to grow, to get jobs, to get married, and lead a normal life – reached out to me to help procure some specialized hardware to create books in Braille. I am heavily involved with Ashalata, an NGO dedicated to assist the children with special needs, and I have been working to organize seminars and cultural events to promote the work done by the organization. Now take a look at the following revised version where the addition of a ‘transition sentence’ and summarizing of some details have resulted in smooth transition of ideas from the previous paragraph, so the two activities that the writer is discussing no longer read like isolated pieces. Good Example # 4: Another extra- professional activity that I am passionate about is helping children with special needs. Since 2012, I am heavily involved with Ashalata, an NGO dedicated to assist the children with special needs, and I have been working to organize seminars and cultural events to promote the work done by the organization. Note: Even though transition words and phrases are useful in bridging the gaps between your ideas, please don’t overuse them. Not every sentence needs a transitional phrase so use one only when the relationship between your thoughts needs clarification. Stay Tuned for Tip# 10 of the story development process next week J For more MBA articles, visit myEssayReview blog. For questions, email me at poonam@myessayreview.com |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: Darden Essay Question Analysis – 2014-15 |
Application Deadlines Round 1: October 10, 2014 Round 2: January 7, 2015 Round 3: April 1, 2015 Describe the most courageous professional decision you have made or action you have taken. What did you learn from that experience? (500 words maximum) Like last year, Darden again requires applicants to write only one essay question for the 2014-2015 admissions cycle. This implies that the story you choose is all the more vital because you will be evaluated just through that. It is very frequently said that we are the choices that we make. So the Admissions Committee will get to know you from what you tell them about the choices you made, the path you took, the reasons that made you choose that particular path, the actions you took and the learning you gleaned from that experience. This essay is a way for Darden to know about your personal traits (motivation, maturity, integrity and self-awareness), the traits they admire in their prospective students. The key words in the essay question are ‘courageous’ and ‘professional’. You are specifically being asked about a decision you made in your professional environment and to elaborate on the courageous element in it. Through this essay question, Darden not only expects you to share your story of a courageous decision that you made at work, but also wants you to narrate your thought process during that time, and the learning you gleaned through that experience. The time consuming part in the process of working on this essay is the brainstorming bit. You have to sit and analyze the best possible example that you’d like to give and weave a story around it. 1. Brainstorming ideas for this question: In order to brainstorm ideas/stories for this essay question, you need to look for instances when things didn’t work the way you had expected them to be and you had to think out of the box and make a choice that required ‘courage’ on your part. For example, you may have encountered one or more of the following situations:
Remember, whatever your story is, it should present you in a positive light, revealing your strengths in the areas of diplomacy, honesty, maturity, ethics, self-awareness and integrity. Be honest in providing details of what you thought, how you felt, what you said, and what you did. These vivid details of your story and your emotions would reveal your character traits and your ability to navigate through complex situations. 2. Structuring the essay: Make sure your story has the following four components:
In the following example, the applicant wraps up his story by outlining what he learned. Example: Challenging the client team at a client location and winning my proposal made me more confident in speaking my mind about the project issues at work. Since then, I have never hesitated in expressing my opinion, and it has helped me provide many valuable contributions to the projects. The assistant Dean of MBA Admissions at Darden, Sara Neher, offered several tips to prospective students for the Darden application essay for this year. She emphasized that it should be a decision you made on your own, no matter how small or big it is. The key is that your decision should have made a difference. An excellent essay, she said, is the one that is able to express the candidate’s emotions well. To watch the video, click here. For more MBA articles, visit myEssayReview blog. For questions, email me at poonam@myessayreview.com |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: Developing Engaging Stories for MBA Essays- Week # 10 -Tip #10 |
Avoid Using Quotations When writing admission essays, most applicants tend to use quotes of famous and distinguished people ( leaders, philosophers, and scientists etc.) who have made a positive impact in the lives of future generations. It is a general perception that using quotations of eminent personalities is a powerful way to impress the readers. I, however, do not recommend using precious words to quote someone else. These essay questions about your goals, accomplishments, leadership experiences, cultural experience, background, setback, and life experiences are designed to evaluate YOU to determine your ‘fit’ with the school, so using someone else’s word, no matter how eminent that person is or was , is often a waste of valuable words, and not a value addition. Let’s look at an example from a student’s optional essay. The essay prompt specifies that you may use this essay to provide any additional information regarding your educational background, leadership experiences or unique accomplishments. Bad Example: Life lesson has taught me “A goal without a plan is just a wish” and the plan is to first pursue EMBA to get a solid footing. I know the journey will be tough but I have already gone thru some of the changes and survived. I am confident that I can do it again. As I read in Dr. Nancy L. Nolan Admission Guide- For Student everywhere “May the size of your dreams be exceeded only by your tenacity to attain them.” I have not given up yet. In the above example, the writer has quoted from an Admission Guide and has also made some generic statements about his goals which does not add any value to the essay. The goal of this essay is to provide additional information about the candidate’s educational background, leadership experiences or unique accomplishments and the above details fail to accomplish that . Now let’s look at the revised version minus the quote: Good Example: In my current Job at XXXX as a senior project manager, I was looking for an opportunity to create a platform where teams could collaborate. I decided to use some presentations from my MS classes to foster team learning, and I started doing these presentations in front of the team during lunch hour. Gradually, these presentation sessions turned into a formal one- hour ‘Lunch and Learn Program’, and the casual nature of the session attracted more people to bring up current issues for healthy discussion. Now this has become a great team building activity that has earned me accolades from the senior management. In this revised version, the writer omits the quote and shares one of his leadership experiences in his own words, which makes complete sense and is far more impactful than the previous version that is filled with generic statements and a quote. Here is another example from another optional essay where the student starts his essay with a quote: Bad Example : “Sacrifice is a part of life. It’s supposed to be. It’s not something to regret. It’s something to aspire to.”. Interactions with professionals in Quality Assurance Consulting industry and workplace mentors confirmed my passion for consulting, and I chose to follow it. Therefore, I decided to develop necessary skills and get the opportunity for career growth through Information Systems. In the above example, the writer starts his optional essay with a quote from someone before starting to discuss his passion for consulting. There is a disconnect between the quote and the following statements. Please note that in the first 59 words of his essay , the writer could not even provide background information for his optional essay. Now let’s look at the revised version: Good Example: I would like to draw the attention of the Ad Com to an important aspect of my candidacy that is relevant to the evaluation of my candidacy i.e. my employment gap. I understand that applying for graduate college is a time-consuming process, so I made a conscious decision to fully dedicate myself to the preparation of the Masters program towards achieving my goals. In order to put in my hundred percent to my application, I quit my job at the XXX in October 2013. In the above revised version, the writer begins his optional essay with a direct statement about his reasons to take a break from employment and thus captures the reader’s attention right away. Thus, using someone else’s words does not necessarily enhance the quality of the essay. However, if you feel that an eminent leader, philosopher, writer or any other illustrious personality’s words of wisdom have played a significant role in shaping or influencing your personality, you may use it, but make sure it is directly aligned to your story and supports it in an effective manner. With B schools reducing the word limits of essays and the number of essay questions every year, each word that you use should count. The word count constraints hardly leave you an option to use up precious space by using someone else’s words, no matter how renowned they are. So ‘quote’ only if you MUST. Stay Tuned for Tip# 11 of the story development process next week J For questions, email me at poonam@myessayreview.com |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: Developing Engaging Stories for MBA Essays – Week # 11-Tip # 11 |
Conclude your Story Well Sometimes I read essays with compelling stories, impressive accomplishments, and flawless writing, but when I am done reading them, I feel something is lacking. What is that? — An effective conclusion. When you forget to wrap up your story, it leaves the reader wondering if the writer is really done. The key to a good story is an engaging beginning, a well-developed middle and a compelling conclusion. Therefore, it is important to sum up all the key components of your story and tie them to your thesis, that is, your main point. You need to bring it full circle to give your essay a sense of completion. Let’s look at the following example from the last paragraph of a ‘leadership’ essay written for Booth. Not so Good Example: I now keenly notice the contributions of every specific team member and make sure everyone gets their due recognition. If I had taken the credit for the success of the project, the word would have gotten out that might have affected my chances of expecting the same level of cooperation for the next project. The above example doesn’t effectively conclude the essay even though the writer summarizes his take away from the leadership experience he has just narrated. Now compare it with the following revised version: Good Example: I keenly notice the contributions of every specific team member and make sure everyone gets their due recognition. If I had taken the credit for the success of the project, the word would have gotten out that might have affected my chances of expecting the same level of cooperation for the next project. I strongly believe that small personal gestures enhance the perception of a true leader who can motivate others to work towards the ultimate goal. I am excited to further enhance my leadership qualities through the courses and workshops offered through the Lead Exploration and Development program offered by Booth. In the above version, the writer shares his perception of leadership based on his experience and then aligns it to the offerings offered by Booth which provides his essay a graceful closure. Now let’s look at this ‘conclusion’ from a’ background’ essay written for Haas. Not so Good Example: Because of my work assignment, we have lived in three different countries and moved six times since we were married eleven years ago. During these years, we have been through lots of things together and supported each other. My family gives me strength and meaning to aim higher and go beyond myself. It has enriched my life and has provided me opportunities to see the world I wouldn’t have otherwise. Also, this constant moving has further enriched my understanding of different cultures and nationalities. In the above example, the writer abruptly ends his essay after giving an account of the influential role his family has played in his life. Now compare this with the following revised version : Good Example: Because of my work assignment, we have lived in three different countries and moved six times since we were married eleven years ago. During these years, we have been through lots of things together and supported each other. My family gives me strength and meaning to aim higher and go beyond myself. It has enriched my life and has provided me opportunities to see the world I wouldn’t have otherwise. Also, this constant moving has further enriched my understanding of different cultures and nationalities. I am very excited about being part of Haas community to further broaden my perspective in life. I am also looking forward to contribute in enriching the Haas culture and bringing my unique and international perspective to the Haas community. In the above version, the writer brings the essay to a graceful conclusion by adding two sentences about his potential association with Haas. Avoid Surprises: When writing your conclusion, please make sure not to include any new information that you have not already shared in your essay. You are writing an admission essay, not a short story where surprise endings might thrill the reader. It is not uncommon for me to review essays that surprise me with an absolutely new detail in the conclusion which has not been indicated anywhere throughout the essay. Let me share an example from an SOP I reviewed: Bad Example: My long term goal is to be an angel investor because my entrepreneur family background has induced my interest in business venture. My work experience at an investment bank will nurture me on how to raise venture capital and to utilize exit strategies such as initial public offering (IPO) and acquisition This information about the writer’s strong entrepreneur back ground took me by surprise because he had not even mentioned it in the body paragraphs of his essay. Later, in his revised version, he included this relevant information about his entrepreneur family background and then reinforced it in his conclusion. Oftentimes, when I emphasize the significance of conclusion, I hear the argument The word limit is prohibitive, so I had no room to write a conclusion. I do agree that shrinking word limits are extremely restrictive; however, the truth is we can always accommodate ourselves as per the word limit specifications. It is always possible to eliminate details that don’t add much value and narrate your story briefly and concisely. To sum up, a ‘conclusion’ brings your essay to a natural and graceful end, sometimes leaving the reader with a final thought on the subject. Therefore, you need to make sure to wrap up your story effectively. You may either write a concluding sentence or a concluding paragraph ,depending on the word limit specifications of your essay. Next week, I will discuss this extremely challenging part of the story development process of MBA essays - ‘adherence to word limits’. Stay Tuned for Tip # 12 next week J For more MBA articles, visit myEssayReview blog. For questions, email me at poonam@myessayreview.com |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: UNC Kenan Flagler Essay Questions Analysis 2014-15 |
Application Deadlines Round 1: October 17, 2014 Round 2: December 12, 2014 Round 3: January 16, 2015 Round 4: March 13, 2015 From the University of North Carolina’s Kenan Flagler Business School Website: MBA Admissions Selection Criteria We seek candidates for admission with strengths in these areas:
Kenan - Flagler Business School requires one required essay and three optional essay questions for the 2014-2015 MBA admissions cycle. Essay One (Required) Please describe your short and long term goals post-MBA. Explain how your professional experience has shaped these goals; why this career option appeals to you, and how you arrived at the decision that now is the time and the MBA is the appropriate degree. (500 words maximum) This is a straightforward goals question. Through this essay question, the Admissions Committee wants to know about your post MBA goals and ambitions, both short-term and long-term. You may want to begin your essay with a story/ event/ life experience that reflects passion for your chosen field. (You may also begin directly with a discussion of your academic and professional career). Continue your story and provide details about how you have pursued your passion, continued your education, acquired new skills and learnings and progressed along your career path in the past XXX years. Specify skills gained at each job position and how your achievements earned you a promotion (may be, ahead of your peers). Then describe where you stand now and what are your short term and long term career aspirations. You have to describe why the particular career option seems suitable to you and how the professional experience you have had shaped up your desire to opt for an MBA degree. This means that you have to draw out a link between your previous experience, your current need of an MBA degree, and your future career goals. Answer the following questions: Ø Why you believe that an MBA is the next logical step in your career path? Ø What are those skills that you still lack which you hope to acquire by an MBA? Ø How an MBA will fill the gaps in your career and bring you closer to the fulfillment of your goals? Ø Why NOW a perfect time for you to go for an MBA degree? Example: My passion for technology , my experience in corporate and business leadership and my childhood vision to be a global business leader and continue my family legacy have defined my goal and fueled my vision to lead my family business into the world of Technology and Consulting. I want to open a new division in my family business in - technology & strategy firm. Through MBA, I will equip myself with very strong fundamentals in management by developing deeper perspectives in various disciplines accountancy, marketing, operations, finance and most importantly, entrepreneurship. Even though the essay prompt doesn’t require you to answer “Why UNC?” it still makes perfect sense to throw in a sentence or two about why an MBA from UNC is your best bet at this time? How it will help you achieve your goals? Your reasons for this could be insights gained from alumni, curriculum, faculty, and the various opportunities outside the classroom that Kenan Flagler provides .You may wrap up your essay by stating what value you will bring to the school. You may organize the question in the following way:
Click here for article on Goals Essay. Click here for sample Goals essay . Essay Two (Optional) What personal qualities or life experiences distinguish you from other applicants? How do these qualities or experiences equip you to contribute to UNC Kenan-Flagler? (300 words maximum) Through this question, the Ad Com wants to know who you are as an individual and how you will add value to the UNC community. This is an interesting question that requires you to do lot of introspection to be able to discuss your personal traits and life experiences, (the people, the events) that have shaped your personality. You have to talk about your background, your current interests and passions, your likes and dislikes, your personal traits that define you and led you to where you currently are. Drawing a link here, like in the previous question, is vital. Here they are keen on knowing about you as a human being, as an individual, and not as an IT person etc. All of us are unique individuals with our own personal traits. Pick 2-3 personal traits that set you apart from other people (e.g. integrity, honesty, maturity, self-awareness etc.) – the traits that you would like the Admission Committee to know about you. Then go ahead and illustrate these with relevant examples. Remember without specific examples, your response will be ineffective. After this, address the second part of the question and focus on the ways in which, you think, you will contribute to the class room and community at Kennan Flagler. You should lay down the ways in which your interests, your passions and hobbies would enrich the Kenan Flagler community and influence it in a positive manner. They will probably receive hundreds of applications from soccer players, another dozen from those who think they write poetry well. That doesn’t mean your chances are slim. It only means you’ve to show them not just that these hobbies are what define you, but also how you will be benefiting the community at Kennan Flagler through this. Example: The varied challenges of the business world have taught me persistence, high spiritedness, and honesty. At Kenan-Flagler, I envision to conduct consulting projects for organizations through STAR program. I want to help small business owners build and develop their business ideas through Global Business Project program. With my culinary skills, I hope to ignite a passion for cooking in my peers and faculty and work towards creating a Chocolate and Bakery club. With my unique qualities and contributions, I will take my peers on their journey of exploration and fulfillment. You may break the essay prompt down in 2 parts:
If your standardized test scores are low, or if you have not had coursework in core business subjects (calculus, microeconomics, statistics, financial accounting), please tell us how you plan to prepare yourself for the quantitative rigor of the MBA curriculum. (300 words maximum) This question is primarily focusing on those whose GMAT score is low and who have lacked math subjects, because the school wants to make sure that they will be able to handle academic rigor at this stage. If you need to answer this question, you can highlight the professional preparation you have already had in quantitative areas. You should also mention how you are brushing up your math knowledge even now and are prepared to do that till school commences. Be honest, do not exaggerate and show them that you are prepared for the academic rigor. Essay Four (Optional) Is there any other information you would like to share that is not presented elsewhere in the application? (300 words maximum) Optional essay provides you with an excellent opportunity to tell the Ad Com what you could not tell because you were bound by the specifications of the essay questions. This question is also meant to shine a spotlight on an experience or side of your personality that has not been revealed in the other parts of your application: essays, recommendation letters and resume. Note: Click here for article on Optional Essay Click here for Sample Optional Essay |
FROM myEssayReview Blog: Developing Engaging Stories for MBA Essays Week #12- Tip #12 |
Choose Your Words Wisely Every year, B schools are cutting down on the number of essays and the word limits of essays they require their prospective students to write. What is the reason behind this changing trend? We all know that Admission officers have thousands of applications to review, so they don’t want to be frustrated with essays filled with overly lengthy paragraphs or sentences which they need to read 2-3 times to make sense of. Clearly, reducing number of essays and their word limits will ease the burden of the admission committee. According to Soojin Kwon, admissions director of Michigan Ross School of Business, “applicants increasingly tell us what they think we want to hear. They have become quite cookie-cutter,” so now they need to write just two short essays totaling 800 words. By imposing strict word limits, B schools will evaluate you for your ability to make your point concisely and succinctly without beating around the bush. Also, exceeding word limit reflects your unwillingness to follow the guidelines. However, following stringent word limits, and sometimes character limits (e.g. Duke’s short answer goals question of 250 characters) becomes one of the biggest challenges for applicants. Some students find it hard to figure out when to stop writing and end up writing 1000 words for an essay with a specified word limit of 400 words. On the contrary, some students limit themselves so hard that even their first drafts of a 500 words essay is composed exactly in 500 words; with the result, they hold on to many relevant details that the school wants to know about them through that question . So the challenge is “How Do I tell my story and adhere to the word limit at the same time?” I always advise my students not to be daunted by word limits when brainstorming ideas/stories for their essays. At that stage, your goal should be to get down on paper all of your ideas required for the essay prompt without worrying if the essay exceeds 100 or 200 words over the word limit. Once you have made sure that your essay addresses all parts of the question in an organized manner, you should identify areas that you think are not adding much value to the story. Then go ahead and begin eliminating those details without compromising on the essential components of the story. Also, omit repetitive content (if any), and replace big phrases by shorter ones. Following is the list of phrases that you can replace by their shorter equivalents: With a view to – To With regard to – About With this in mind – Therefore Under no circumstances – Never Prior to that time – Before Perform an analysis of Analyze Provide information about Inform Subsequent to – After Is indicative of – Indicates Reached an agreement – Agreed At this point in time – Now Come to the conclusion – Conclude Despite the fact that Although I am of the opinion I think It is incumbent on me I must Make decision to – Decide In addition to – Besides On the grounds that – Since Let’s look at some examples: Bad Example: I would say that my family is the major factor which, to a large extent, led me to where I am today. (22 words) You are the writer of this essay, so it is understood that you are voicing your opinion. So why waste 4 precious words in saying ‘I would say that?” Good Example: My family is the major factor which, to a large extent, led me to where I am today. (18 words) Bad Example: It is evident from this example how my prior experience as a technologist has helped me in providing solutions. (19 words) Good Example: Thus , my prior experience as a technologist has helped me in providing solutions. (13 words) Now take a look at the following examples. The first one is lengthy (43 words) and the second one is the edited version (27 words). Bad example: When one of my best friends was placed on academic probation, I made it my personal mission to help her regain good academic standing. I spent many hours tutoring her in chemistry and calculus, and with my support, she regained good academic standing. (43 words) Good Example: When one of my best friends was placed on academic probation, I spent hours tutoring her in chemistry and calculus and helped her regain good academic standing. ( 27 words) To sum up, you can always tell your story effectively while staying within the word limit constraints. Follow the principle of ‘less is more’ and be as precise as you can. Often my students come up with this question if it is ok to exceed the word limits by 5-10%. I tell them that even though it appears to be an accepted practice, my personal preference is to strictly follow the word limit specification. So if the essay prompt instructions specify 400 words, I would not finalize an essay with 401 words. Note: Refer to Adam Rubenfire’s article “Want to Get into Business School? Write Less. Talk More” https://online.wsj.com/articles/want-to-get-into-business-school-write-less-talk-more-1404340224 Stay Tuned for Tip # 13 of the story development process next week J For more MBA articles, visit myEssayReview blog. For questions, email me at poonam@myessayreview.com |
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