Request to rate my AWA

Hi Brian,

Many thanks for your feedback. I now pay attention to the structure of the write-up and ensure its not like a collection of bullet points.

Given below is my latest AWA. Request you to rate and provide feedback on this one too, please 0- its very helpful. With my GMAT less than a month away, your thoughts would be immensely valuable.

Question:

The following appeared in the opinion section of a national newsmagazine:

“To reverse the deterioration of the postal service, the government should raise the price of postage stamps. This solution will no doubt prove effective, since the price increase will generate larger revenues and will also reduce the volume of mail, thereby eliminating the strain on the existing system and contributing to improved morale.”

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion, be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counterexamples might weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion.

My response:

The argument states that increasing the price of postal stamps will help reverse the deterioration of the postal service. The author assumes that an increase in price will lead to an larger revenues and reduced mail volumes. However, it does not provide any evidence to support these claims. In addition, it assumes that reduced volume will lead to improve morale of the employees. However, this might not be the case if an increase in price leads to reduced demand for postal services and thus dries up volumes. Such a situation will not only reduce revenues (opposed to an increase assumed by the author) but also lead to dissatisfaction among workers due to lack of work to occupy them. Hence, the overall line of reasoning used seems very flawed.

Any evidence which proves that increasing prices of postal stamps leads to decline in revenues will weaken the argument. Such evidence may include a survey of a sample of people who use postal services regularly, historical evidence of the negative impact of increase in prices on postal services in a state or country, and the adverse impact of any price increase on similar utility services.

On the contrary, if there is evidence that a price increase leads to higher revenues and reduced volume to manageable levels, the argument will be strengthened. Also, if there is a survey that proves that postal stamps have elastic demand, and a higher price will reduce volumes (yet increase total revenues), the argument will be strengthened.

To better evaluate the conclusion of the argument, it is important to understand the underlying reasons for the poor state of the postal services. For instance, the reason for low morale might not be the workload but other factors such as the way the postal department treats its workers. The impact of changing technology and alternative modes of communication, such as email, and competition from private courier / cargo services should also be assessed. There may be a survey conducted to better understand these factors and their impact on demand for postal services. For instance, the survey may reveal that postal services are not be viewed as efficient or reliable by many and an increase in price will diminish the demand to very low levels, leading to a decline in total revenues.

Thus, a better understanding of the underlying reasons for the poor state of the postal service will help evaluate the argument better.

Thanks!