adkikani wrote:
Hi
mikemcgarryAs a matter of fact, I did go through your explanations but still
find that
those and
that are un-necessary in option A.
In fact we have contrasting views since I find E to be more precise.
Let me know gaps in my understanding.
WR,
Arpit
Dear Arpit
adkikani,
I'm happy to respond.
My friend, this is a subtle matter. I don't know whether English is your first language, but this choice between (A) & (E) certainly could be perplexing to a non-native speaker. Here's everything after the word "
that" in choice (A)
(A) . . .
the patterns of stress that girls experience are more likely to result in depression than are those that boys experience. The word "
those" is necessary: it's a demonstrative pronoun standing in for "
the patterns of stress." The word "
that" is not only necessary as a relative pronoun beginning a noun-modifying clause, but it also anchors the parallelism by reflecting the previous "
that" (before the word "
girls"). This presents us with perfectly parallel endings with the matching noun-modifying clauses "
that girls experience . . . that boys experience." This is elegant and well-written, and not a single iota of it is unnecessary.
By contrast, here's (E):
(E) . . .
the patterns of stress that girls experience are more likely to result in depression than stress patterns of boysTo the ears of native English speakers, this is a major train wreck. Notice that the definite article "
the" is missing, which adds to the awkwardness. Note that, in contrast to (A), there is not even the vaguest attempt to construct a mirrored pattern of matching. This sounds stunted and unnatural. I can see that someone whose first language is not English might be tempted to mistake this construction for concision. The GMAT SC is so challenging, because these writers excel at creating combinations of words that might sound plausible if you don't know the language well but which simply sound off if you are a native speaker. There is often something suspect about putting two nouns together ("
stress" + "
patterns"), especially if these two nouns were not put together in this way in the first branch of the parallelism. The phrase "
the patterns of stress that girls experience" sounds academic and formal, and the phrase "
the stress patterns of boys" sounds casual, perhaps as one might see in advertising; this juxtaposition, in corresponding branches of the parallelism, creates a kind of mismatch in level of formality. Add to this that (E) completely omits the definite modifier: that absence makes (E) clankingly awkward. There is absolutely no way (E) could be correct.
My friend, does all this make sense?
Mike