When drafting the Declaration of Sentiments that was adopted at the Seneca Falls Women’s Rights Conventions in 1848, included n it by the author, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, was a call for female enfranchisement.


a When drafting the Declaration of Sentiments that was adopted at the Seneca Falls Women’s Rights Conventions in 1848, included n it by the author, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, was a call for female enfranchisement.

b. Including a call for female enfranchisement, a draft of the Declaration of Sentiments was adopted at the Seneca Falls Women’s Rights Conventions in 1848 that Elizabeth Cady Stanton wrote.

c. When the Declaration of Sentiments drafted by Elizabeth Cady Stanton was adopted at the Seneca Falls Women’s Rights Convention in 1848, a call for female enfranchisement had been included in it .

d. A call for female enfranchisement, included in Elizabeth Cady Stanton’s draft of the Declaration of Sentiments in 1848, that was adopted by the Seneca Falls Women’s Rights Convention.

e. When Elizabeth Cady Stanton drafted the Declaration of Sentiments that was adopted at the Seneca Falls Women’s Rights Convention in 1848, she included in it a call for female enfranchisement.



could you explain why the answer is ( )?

Isn't there a pronoun problem in E? Does the pronoun "it" refer to the draft or the convention?

+1 for E... Would love to know the OA for this

Is E not run on sentence. Or it is not because of usage of "when" in first sentence.
I removed E for above reason along with "it" issue.
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Hi All,

When drafting the Declaration of Sentiments that was adopted at the Seneca Falls Women’s Rights Conventions in 1848, included in it by the author, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, was a call for female enfranchisement.



The way this sentence is written the meaning is not very clear. So let us decipher the meaning first. We get some information from this sentence. Elizabeth Cady Stanton drafted the DoS. She included in it a call for female enfranchisement. This DoS was adopted at the Seneca Falls Women’s Rights Conventions in 1848.



Error Analysis:

1. Modifier “When drafting …” is ambiguous in its role. We don’t know what it is modifying.
2. This sentence needs to be written in a way so that the meaning is easy to comprehend.

POE:

Choice A: When drafting the Declaration of Sentiments that was adopted at the Seneca Falls Women’s Rights Conventions in 1848, included n it by the author, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, was a call for female enfranchisement. Incorrect for the reason stated above.

Choice B: Including a call for female enfranchisement, a draft of the Declaration of Sentiments was adopted at the Seneca Falls Women’s Rights Conventions in 1848 that Elizabeth Cady Stanton wrote. Incorrect.
1. The opening modifier is illogically modifying “a draft”. The draft did not do the action of including the call.
2. This choice fails to say that who included the call for women enfranchisement in the DoS.

Choice C: When the Declaration of Sentiments drafted by Elizabeth Cady Stanton was adopted at the Seneca Falls Women’s Rights Convention in 1848, a call for female enfranchisement had been included in it. Incorrect. This choice fails to say who included the call in the DoS.

Choice D: A call for female enfranchisement, included in Elizabeth Cady Stanton’s draft of the Declaration of Sentiments in 1848, that was adopted by the Seneca Falls Women’s Rights Convention. Incorrect. This choice lacks a main verb and hence is a fragment.

Choice E: When Elizabeth Cady Stanton drafted the Declaration of Sentiments that was adopted at the Seneca Falls Women’s Rights Convention in 1848, she included in it a call for female enfranchisement. Correct. All the information is clearly given in this choice.

PS- Pronoun “it” clearly refers to DoS because the sentence clearly says that Stanton drafted the DoS, and when she drafted it, she included in “it” (DoS) the call for women enfranchisement.

Hope this helps.
Thanks.
Shraddha
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