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Would you give some feedbacks on my Toefl essay please?

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Would you give some feedbacks on my Toefl essay please? [#permalink] New post 21 Aug 2012, 01:37
Would you give some feedbacks on my Toefl essay please?
I know about the misspellings but I can't have more than twenty minutes to write this essay. I would really appreciate any feedbacks,
Thanks in advance

The topic is

It has been said, "Not everything that is learned is contained in books." Compare and contrast the knowledge gained from experience with knowledge gained from books. In your opinion, which source is more important? Why? Use specific reasons and example to support your answer.

Essay

There are different sourses we can gain the knowledge from. Things could be learned by doing something and getting the first hand experience, or reading about the subject from published sources, and sometimes even by watching tv.
When it comes to comparing the knowledge gained from books and the knowledge gained from personal experince there begins the problems. All I can say is that it depends... There are sertain things that are better to be learned from books while the others are best to learned by getting a first hand experience.

The knowledge gained from books is often times more indepth than the one that you can learn by yourself. The information presented in a book contains the knowledge that was gained by the authour by researching or maybe even getting the first hand experience. It always useful to read and learn the others opinion on the subject. It can take years to learn some things shoud you decide to learn everything by your own. So why not to take a guide prepared by a guru who is willing to share his or her secrets?

On the other hand it doesn't work for all of the subjects. If for example, you want to learn camping it should be way more effective to actually go with a couple of friends for a trip instead of spending a day in a library reading about camping. The techniques that might be presented in a book often times are just outdated. There is never a garantee that the author is a real proffesional, not just an amateur with a passion for writing. Its also that, some of the knowledge is never taught in books just because that might be a proffecional secret. For example you never going to learn how to became a successful stock broker from books just because no one is willing to give away their secrets. Those secrets could only be learned by years of proffecional experience in the field and by learning from your own mistakes.

In conclusin, I think that all sourses of information whether its books, magazine artickles, lectures from a local college or a first hand experince can be treated equally. You should just decide when its better to use each of them based on the kind of knowledge you want to gain.
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Would you give some feedbacks on my Toefl essay please?   [#permalink] 21 Aug 2012, 01:37
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Would you give some feedbacks on my Toefl essay please?

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