How Personal is Too Personal?
The personal statement serves as a terrific opportunity to share with admissions committees an interesting and unique aspect of your life. How much should you tell, and how much is too much?
When I applied to college, I wrote a personal statement describing some challenging family circumstances I’d had while growing up. I can still remember my best friend warning me that it was too risky, too intense. So I went back to the essay and asked myself: What did I learn from this experience? Does it speak to my strengths and individual qualities, or is it something meant for a therapist’s office or a private journal?
I studied the essay carefully and made sure it gave the reader a good sense of who I really was, and that it wasn’t just about the people in my family. I was careful to focus on what I had learned from these challenges and how the experience had made me a more independent, compassionate person.
I decided to send it in, and I was lucky to get great responses. (In fact, one admissions counselor even wrote me a personal note!) So, in that case, taking the leap was well worth it. But, in some cases, it is not.
What are the adcoms looking for?
All admissions committees want to accept a wide range of interesting, talented applicants. They want – as you would, if you were picking a team of any sort – a diverse group of smart, motivated, innovative, and unique individuals who can come together to create an interesting, richly layered community. They want people with integrity who will get along with others, and they want people who will add to their campus in an endless variety of ways. They also want applicants who are stable and confident, and who have already achieved important things in their lives.
How do you choose a personal, but not too personal essay topic?
Prepare for your personal statement by listing all of the meaningful events in your life. Which experiences really changed you, influenced you, and made you the person you are today?
Good questions you may want to ask yourself include:
Then, mark the ones that helped you learn what you want to do with your life, the ones that led you to clarify your values, even if they are very personal. Ask yourself: Do these experiences make me sound emotionally unstable, ambivalent, or insecure? If so, take them to a therapist, not the admissions committee! But, if your topic has helped you become stronger and wiser, then I’d consider it to be a viable option.
Tips for sharing personal stories
Here are a few tips to further help you determine if your personal statement is too personal or just right for displaying your inner truths and ambitions:
If you pass the above criteria, then I’d say go for it. Be yourself. Make it interesting. And tell the truth.
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