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# Argument Essay : Motorcycle X GMATPREP 1

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Argument Essay : Motorcycle X GMATPREP 1 [#permalink]

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15 Oct 2012, 09:27
Hi guys

As the d-day is comming up, I decided to focus on the AWA section as I particularly neglected this area during my preparation. This argument essay if from the GMATPREP software.

I would really appreciate if you could take some minutes of your precious time to rate my essay. I am open to all kind of criticism and advice. I used Chineseburned guide for this essay.

Cheers!

“Motorcycle X has been manufactured in the United States for over 70 years. Although one foreign company has copied the motorcycle and is selling it for less, the company has failed to attract motorcycle X customers - some say because its products lacks the exceptionally loud noise made by motorcycle X. But there must be some other explanation. After all, foreign cars tend to be quieter than similar American-made cars, but they sell at least as well. Also, television advertisements for motorcycle X highlight its durability and sleek lines, not its noisiness and the ads typically have voice-overs or rock music rather than engine roar on the sound track.”

The argument rejects the lack of noise made by the manufacturer’s motorcycle as an explanation supporting the disrupted attempt of attracting motorcycle X customers and argues that there might be some other explanation. To justify his claim, the author compares American-made cars and foreign cars, which tend to be quieter the former and describe television advertisements for motorcycle X that typically highlight other features that the motorcycle’s noisiness.
Stated in this way, the argument reveals examples of leap of faith, poor reasoning and ill-defined terminology. The conclusion of the argument relies on assumptions for which there are no clear evidence. Hence, the argument is unconvincing and has several flaws.

First, the argument readily assumes that as quieter foreign cars sell at least as well as American-made cars, quieter motorcycles should do so as well, implying that the noisiness of a motorcycle is a factor, future motorcycles owners consider during the buying decision. This is a weak statement as the author fails to draw a parallel between the factors influencing the buying process of a car and factors influencing that of a motorcycle. The argument implies that car buyers and motorcycles buyers are quite similar on the features they base their buying decision. However, a typical car driver tends to favor different characteristics than a typical motorcycle. For example, future car buyers usually emphasize on characteristics such as head room, seats capacity, security, comfort rather than speed, horse power and so on. A family is more likely to buy a quieter, more secure four-door sedan than a noisy, fast racing car. If the author had compared the factors that car buyers favors with those of motorcycles buyers and provided evidence that these two parties are similar, the argument could have been clearer and strengthened.

Second, the author claims that as television advertisements for motorcycle X does not highlight its noisiness but instead, advertisements highlight its durability and sleek lines and use rock music on the sound track, the noisiness of the motorcycle X does not influence the purchase of the vehicle itself. This statement is again unconvincing as it does not to demonstrate a correlation between the features ads highlight and the features motorcycles buyers consider important. In fact, the manufacturer of motorcycle X may not need to highlight the noisiness of its vehicle, which has been selling for over 70 years now, having gained certain reputation among the motorcycle passionate. For instance, the famous motorcycle manufacturer Harley Davidson, famous for its engines’ noise and particular design, showed a lonely biker riding trough empty landscapes, with rock music on the background in one of its television advertisement. Nevertheless, if the argument had provided evidence that television advertisements reflect what motorcycle drivers care about, the argument would have sounded more convincing.

Finally, the argument states that there might be other explanations about the underperformance of the foreign company rather than the lack of noisiness of its motorcycles. The argument does not present these underlined explanations, for which there are no evidence. Without these explanations, one is left with the impression that the claim is more of wishful thinking than substantive evidence.
In summary, the argument is flawed and is therefore unconvincing for the above mentioned reasons. It could be considerably strengthened if the author clearly mentioned all the relevant facts. In order to assess the merits of a certain situation, it is essential to have full knowledge of all contributing factors.
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Re: Argument Essay : Motorcycle X GMATPREP 1 [#permalink]

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15 Oct 2012, 22:46
1
KUDOS
beyhan03 wrote:
Hi guys

As the d-day is comming up, I decided to focus on the AWA section as I particularly neglected this area during my preparation. This argument essay if from the GMATPREP software.

I would really appreciate if you could take some minutes of your precious time to rate my essay. I am open to all kind of criticism and advice. I used Chineseburned guide for this essay.

Cheers!

“Motorcycle X has been manufactured in the United States for over 70 years. Although one foreign company has copied the motorcycle and is selling it for less, the company has failed to attract motorcycle X customers - some say because its products lacks the exceptionally loud noise made by motorcycle X. But there must be some other explanation. After all, foreign cars tend to be quieter than similar American-made cars, but they sell at least as well. Also, television advertisements for motorcycle X highlight its durability and sleek lines, not its noisiness and the ads typically have voice-overs or rock music rather than engine roar on the sound track.”

The argument rejects the lack of noise made by the manufacturer’s motorcycle as an explanation supporting the disrupted attempt of attracting motorcycle X customers and argues that there might be some other explanation. To justify his claim, the author compares American-made cars and foreign cars, which tend to be quieter the former and describe television advertisements for motorcycle X that typically highlight other features that the motorcycle’s noisiness.
Stated in this way, the argument reveals examples of leap of faith, poor reasoning and ill-defined terminology. The conclusion of the argument relies on assumptions for which there are no clear evidence. Hence, the argument is unconvincing and has several flaws.

First, the argument readily assumes that as quieter foreign cars sell at least as well as American-made cars, quieter motorcycles should do so as well, implying that the noisiness of a motorcycle is a factor, future motorcycles owners consider during the buying decision. This is a weak statement as the author fails to draw a parallel between the factors influencing the buying process of a car and factors influencing that of a motorcycle. The argument implies that car buyers and motorcycles buyers are quite similar on the features they base their buying decision. However, a typical car driver tends to favor different characteristics than a typical motorcycle. For example, future car buyers usually emphasize on characteristics such as head room, seats capacity, security, comfort rather than speed, horse power and so on. A family is more likely to buy a quieter, more secure four-door sedan than a noisy, fast racing car. If the author had compared the factors that car buyers favors with those of motorcycles buyers and provided evidence that these two parties are similar, the argument could have been clearer and strengthened.

Second, the author claims that as television advertisements for motorcycle X does not highlight its noisiness but instead, advertisements highlight its durability and sleek lines and use rock music on the sound track, the noisiness of the motorcycle X does not influence the purchase of the vehicle itself. This statement is again unconvincing as it does not to demonstrate a correlation between the features ads highlight and the features motorcycles buyers consider important. In fact, the manufacturer of motorcycle X may not need to highlight the noisiness of its vehicle, which has been selling for over 70 years now, having gained certain reputation among the motorcycle passionate. For instance, the famous motorcycle manufacturer Harley Davidson, famous for its engines’ noise and particular design, showed a lonely biker riding trough empty landscapes, with rock music on the background in one of its television advertisement. Nevertheless, if the argument had provided evidence that television advertisements reflect what motorcycle drivers care about, the argument would have sounded more convincing.

Finally, the argument states that there might be other explanations about the underperformance of the foreign company rather than the lack of noisiness of its motorcycles. The argument does not present these underlined explanations, for which there are no evidence. Without these explanations, one is left with the impression that the claim is more of wishful thinking than substantive evidence.
In summary, the argument is flawed and is therefore unconvincing for the above mentioned reasons. It could be considerably strengthened if the author clearly mentioned all the relevant facts. In order to assess the merits of a certain situation, it is essential to have full knowledge of all contributing factors.

Hi Beyhan,

Certain obserations:
Probably the passage/essay has not been re-read after compiling and therefore is full of logical and grammatical errors. For example, I've highlighted some instances of grammatical mistakes in para 1. Same exercise could be carried out for other paragraphs as well.
Again, while pointing out the flaws in argument you have made similar mistakes ie. assumuption, jumping to conclusion etc. For example, in para 2, the line marked in red. "a typical car driver tends to favor different characteristics than a typical motorcycle" . I believe tends should be replaced with "may tend" to avoid asserting something for which even you dont have supporting evidence.
Another example is in para 4- "underperformance of the foreign company" The author has never claimed that foreign company has underperformed instead he mentioned that it failed to attact company X's customers. Author could be targetting only a particular segment of those "loyal" customers in his argument. And thus the line marked red shows an assumption in your essay.
Also, In para 3 there is a sentence , marked in red, which potentially is a very good SC question

I'm not an expert in AWA and hence would not rate it with numbers, just tried to provide you some feedback.
Hope it helps.

Cheers
Vips
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Re: Argument Essay : Motorcycle X GMATPREP 1 [#permalink]

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20 Feb 2017, 00:51
Hi Guys,

The author of the article claims that the forieng company's failure to sell it's version of motorcycle x has some other explaination but its lack of a specific feature - i.e. exceptionally loud noise made by motorcycle X. The author based his argument on the fact that similar comparision can be made between cars made by American and foreign manufacturers and thus it lacks the logic. The author further tries to bolster the argument by providing additional facts about television advertisements, however it does not help to substantiate the claim that author tries to put.

The author compares the sale of cars with that of Motorcycle X. However, in this argument, author ignores the fact that buying a car and motorcycle work with two different set of perspectives and hence, they are not the same. For an average American, while buying the car, he looks for comfort, leg room, size of his family, horsepower, fuel efficiency etc. Comfortable cars are quiter than the less comfortable cars. However, the same parameters are not applied when buying Motorcycle X. Hence this comparision is not logicial. It is like comparing apple with oranges.

Similarly, author claims that television advertisements for motorcycle X does not highlight its noisiness. However, author undermines the point that the brand has been in and around 70 years and is well known for its loud engine roars. If that is the case, it may not be required to advertise that feature. Also only the advertisement does not make a sale successful or failure. People talk to each other and get opinion about a product like Motorcycle X. And if hearsay is that the other brand of motorcycle does not roar as loudly as Motorcycle X, people may not be inclined in buying it.

In conclusion, while the author is partially right in saying there could be other factors playing the role in forieng company's failure to attract customers, however, his conclusion that its lack of loud noise is not the reason - is full of doubts and loopholes.
Re: Argument Essay : Motorcycle X GMATPREP 1   [#permalink] 20 Feb 2017, 00:51
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