Hello gmatycoon
Welcome to GMAT Club!AWA Score: 5 - 5.5 out of 6
Coherence and connectivity: 4.5/5
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.
Paragraph structure and formation: 3.5/5
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.
Vocabulary and word expression: 5/5
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!
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https://gmatclub.com/forum/how-to-get-6 ... 64327.htmlhttps://gmatclub.com/forum/the-gmatclub ... 36251.htmlAlso, don't forget to read and follow the AWA sub-forum posting rules before posting. You can read the posting rules in post in the link below,https://gmatclub.com/forum/awa-forum-ru ... 64141.htmlGood Luckgmatycoon wrote:
The following appeared in a magazine article on trends and lifestyles.
"In general, people are not as concerned as they were a decade ago about regulating their intake of red meat and fatty cheeses. Walk into the Heart's Delight, a store that started selling organic fruits and vegetables and whole-grain flours in the 1960's, and you will also find a wide selection of cheeses made with high butterfat content. Next door, the owners of the Good Earth Café, an old vegetarian restaurant, are still making a modest living, but the owners of the new House of Beef across the street are millionaires."
Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counterexamples might weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion.
Your Answer:
The argument claims that since fatty cheeses and red meat are highly demanded in a specific market, people are not as concerned about their health as they were a decade ago. Formulated in this way, the argument fails to consider several key factors that would call into question the validity of the conclusion.
To begin with, the author assumes that what is valid in a given city, will hold true in general. Every local market is different and therefore we can't infer any conclusion without considering a sample of cities of different sizes and located all around the world.
For instance, the author may be considering the specific case of a small city where the vast majority of the inhabitants are not aware about the potential risks of eating red meats and fatty cheeses. As a consequence, the average intake of this sort of food may be higher in that city than it would be in a cosmopolitan city, such as London or Paris, where consumers have different backgrounds and culinary traditions mix.
Secondarely, the argument fails to provide supporting evidence on how the diet of the average human being evolved in the last decade. It is widely known that the intake of red meat has been increasing after the Second World War because people on average are wealthier and therefore can afford more expensive food. Should it be the case, then the fact that in the past people were used to consume less meat may not be due to health concerns, but due to financial constraints.
In conclusion, the argument is flawed for the above mentioned reasons and therefore it fails to make a convincing point that people are not as concerned as they were a decade ago about their intakes of red meat and fatty cheeses.
Had the author provided supporting evidence, such as a survey based on the dietary habits of a large sample of adult people from all over the world, then we would have had a stronger basis to assess the argument.