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Looking for critique for my practice AWA

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Intern
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Joined: 02 Jun 2017
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Looking for critique for my practice AWA [#permalink]

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New post 03 Sep 2017, 10:48
I have completed an AWA practice response and would really appreciate some critiques for improvement.


Essay Question:
The following appeared in a newspaper editorial:

"The claims of some politicians that we are on the brink of an energy crisis are misguided. We have enough oil in reserve to see us through any production shortage and the supply of in-ground oil is in no danger of running out any time soon. There is thus no need to set aside the technology and infrastructure of a century of oil-based energy."

My Response:

The argument makes many critical assumptions rendering the conclusion flawed. Primarily, the argument uses vague language describing the quantity of oil in reserve, which is the fact that the argument is based on.

Firstly, the argument claims that "the supply of in-ground oil is in no danger of running out any time soon". The vague language in this statement could mean many things. "Any time soon" is a relative statement and could refer to any amount of time depending on the comparison. This statement of relativity provides no context and weakens the argument. Also, we are not told what constitutes an energy crisis. If quantifiable information were given to describe exactly how much in-ground oil were left, the argument would be strengthened. One could more easily conclude why an energy crisis is or is not imminent with this information.

Furthermore, the argument assumes that the current environment will be the same in the future. By claiming that we have enough oil now, so we will be fine in the future does not account for changes over time. This argument is flawed because oil consumption could increase more than expected over time and render what constitutes "enough oil" mistaken. There is no evidence to suggest what the conditions of the future will be, and thus makes it impossible to decide whether the current environment will be applicable in the future. If more information were provided describing oil consumption rates, in-ground oil quantities, and transition times between oil and alternate energy sources, we could more easily understand the comparison between current and future conditions. None of this data is provided and thus creates a weak argument based on assumptions.

The argument is constructed using many logical fallacies and does not provide enough detail to make a meaningful and persuasive conclusion.

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Intern
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Joined: 08 May 2017
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Kudos [?]: 0 [0], given: 0

Re: Looking for critique for my practice AWA [#permalink]

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New post 11 Sep 2017, 17:37
This is a great piece. In my view you could have stated the conclusion for the reader to understand where you are coming from. Also since you had time at your disposal (assuming you didn't time yourself) you have given more assumptions which the argument fails to consider like natural disaster or any disaster which can ruin the deposit. But hey you've done well (thumbs up)

Sent from my Infinix NOTE 3 Pro using GMAT Club Forum mobile app

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Re: Looking for critique for my practice AWA   [#permalink] 11 Sep 2017, 17:37
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Looking for critique for my practice AWA

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