AWA Score: 5 out of 6!
I have used a GMATAWA auto-grader to evaluate your essay.
Coherence and connectivity: 3/5
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.
Paragraph structure and formation: 4.5/5
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.
Vocabulary and word expression: 4.5/5
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!
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Q: Prompt: “Over the past decade, the restaurant industry in the country of Spiessa has experienced unprecedented growth. This surge can be expected to continue in the coming years, fuelled by recent social changes: personal incomes are rising, more leisure time is available, single‐person households are more common, and people have a greater interest in gourmet food, as evidenced by a proliferation of publications on the subject.”
Essay Format
The argument debates that the restaurant industry is on a rise in country of Spiessa, citing reasons that economy is growing, personal incomes are also growing. People have leisure time and single person good income can be the key driving factor of the same. But the author has failed to provide any evident or statistics in this regard, failing which it can be merely an assumption or more of a thoughtful wish. Without any datas in this regard, the argument is devoid of the fact and is a leap of faith in this regard which needs to be addressed.
First, the author states that over past the restaurant industry has experienced an unprecedented growth which can be a factor to sustain in the future. This statement is itself vague and preposterous as the development in past cannot be a guarantee in the future. Much of it can be said that in 2019 all hospitality industries were booming, but once the pandemic set in, they all ceased to even meet their day to day expense. However if the author would have corroborated with some datas or policies of the government inclination to support the industry, it would have helped a lot.
Second, the author has strengthened his position by stating that the surge if met can be fuelled by recent social changes bearing in mind that incomes are rising, more leisure times are available and single person household income are more common. This concept is also enough to baffle the readers. The authors though have sighted good points, but have failed to note that social changes and increase in household economies cannot be a factor to support that restaurants industry businesses in the country will rise. Today’s generation is a startup generation. People earn and try to invest money which can in lieu work for them. Also pandemic has shown people at large that savings are the one which can bail out in time of necessities.
Third, the author has failed to understand that in today’s world people having great interest in gourmet do not necessarily means that they will step into a restaurant to taste the same. People have changed the stance from user end to maker end. People love cooking now a days evident is the example of so many masterchef programmes running in different country. So, Unless the author explicitly proofs his point, a conclusion would be too naive.
In conclusion, the argument remains flawed for the reasons cited above. The author should present facts corroborated with relevant facts and developments if any. From the facts presented by author, he should have tried to have a holistic survey with a large number of respondents. In order to access the merit of the certain situation the author should have full access of the knowledge and measures to increase the same. Without this information the argument remains unsubstantiated and open to debate.