Tuck$ vs Yale$ vs Kellogg [SOLVED: Yale]

As deposit day approaches, I have been struggling with making a final decision and have been going back and forth on each business school dependent on the minute / day. I have been admitted to Yale with $$, Tuck with equal $$, and Kellogg with no $$.

I am a career switcher from an oil/gas supermajor looking to pivot to management consulting. Due to personal reasons (my partner is currently located in New Haven, but will relocate likely to Chicago after graduation) I am looking to be located in Chicago post MBA. That being said, we would like to avoid long distance during school if at all possible, so still considering Yale (we could live together) or Tuck (short drive to New Haven). I realize I have stated quite a few strong personal preferences that make evaluating this decision very difficult, but could sill use some opinions as I am really struggling with choosing an option.

Tuck:

-Pros:
1. Strong Consulting Recruiting (albeit in the NE vs Midwest)
2. Alums seem like they would chop off an appendage to make sure you get a job
3. Fun Culture (i'm down with drinking beer and hiking and being in the middle of nowhere for 2 years)
4. Close to partner
5. Get to know your professors well
6. Tripod Hockey (sounds super fun)
7. Revers Center for Energy

-Cons:
1. Seems like frat bro / sorority central (maybe reading into this too much, but it seems like if you aren't affluent or grew up skiing, the culture while tight knit, can be off putting)
2. Doesn't necessarily place well in midwest (likely self selection, I see roughly 10-15 alum at each mbb in chicago)
3. Dorms (Dorms are a plus in that they create a great environment for cohesion and bonding. I would however have to sell a lot of nice kitchen crap I don't want to sell or get rid of)
4. EVERYONE I have talked to at my work has no idea what Tuck is. I am in an industry that is somewhat indifferent to MBA's in general, but looking to get into management consulting which is very sensitive to MBA rankings / prestige. My parents have no idea what Tuck is. They have heard of Dartmouth due to Superbad. Not sure if that is good or bad?
5. Least amount of electives and classes. Relatively standard business education and not much else.
6. Rankings. While superficial, Tuck has momentum in the wrong direction. While not concerned now about the rankings as Tuck places well in consulting, I am concerned 10-20 years from now when Tuck is ranked 15-20 potentially?

Yale:

-Pros:
1. Live with partner. Besides the personal pros here, would also mean the cheapest program by a decent amount.
2. Yale Bomb is a thing most places outside of MBA specific jobs (my whole work team and both parents thinks I should attend Yale lol)
3. Focus on business and society (love that people who come from previous non profit / government are heavily represented)
4. Sustainability classes through cross registering at the Yale School of Environment
5. Greater diversity of types of candidates attracted to the school, lots of experiences
6. High percentage of consulting jobs post MBA, albeit at probably lower ranked firms
8. I think the integrated curriculum with perspectives such as State and Society, Investor, and Employee sounds really cool.
7. Momentum of the rankings is encouraging

-Cons:
1. Eclectic group of people leads me to rubbing my head and needing ibuprofen after some interactions. I have a love hate relationship with people who I have met at Yale. Everyone seems to be passionate about their beliefs, however some are completely intolerant of listening to other perspectives (like being overtly aggressive about the fact that I come from Oil and Gas)
2. Potentially lower tier recruiting outcomes. Don't really need to explain this. Yale will likely have the lowest floor of consulting recruiting outcomes (not that MBB is impossible, just potentially less likely).
3. People recruit to the NE usually
4. Least amount of living alum due to being a new program
5. Neither in a city, nor rural. Kind of takes the cons of tuck's and kellogg's locations and combines it into just a somewhat mediocre location to go to school. I like New Haven fine, (I've lived in much worse places) but it doesn't excite me either.
6. Attending the "worst" Yale school. SOM tries to paint the picture that attending opens access to all Yale Alums. I could see Yale Law and Yale College alumns sneering at the fact you went to SOM. Don't know if that actually happens, but I could see it.

Kellogg:
-Pros:
1. Highest Ranked
2. Chicago Consulting Recruiting
3. More people generally means more diverse. That being said it seems most people are ex bankers or ex consultants so I would say less diverse than Yale in certain perspectives, but more so than Tuck.
4. Being at a large school means a crap ton of electives and curriculum optionality. PE Lab sounds cool, would love to be in PE operations one day.
5. People at my work have at least heard of Kellogg. My parents however think it's a cereal still. I told them I would be going to Northwestern, they still have no idea what that is.
6. Nice safe apartments and lots of fun city stuff to do.

-Cons:
1. Furthest from partner
2. Largest school means most diluted brand and cohesion
3. Most expensive
4. I don't look good in purple? (trying to think of some other cons, but to me Kellogg is just a really safe option minus the relationship and cost of attendance)

What I would do if I was single:
Go to Kellogg. I love the ridiculously high floor of Kellogg and to me the $ differential is worth it.

What I would do if I was guaranteed an MBB offer:
In a perfect world, I would probably choose Yale if I knew 100% that I would get MBB in a city of my choosing. That being said I really don't know how difficult it will be for me to get a consulting offer. I feel like I am a relatively strong candidate, but probably everyone thinks that before they go 0/7 on consulting interviews haha.

What I am currently thinking because I am in a relationship and MBB is anything but a guarantee:
Tuck, due to the drivable distance but also good consulting recruiting. Seems to be a blend of the pros and cons of Kellogg and Yale in that I am close to my partner but a higher consulting floor than Yale. That being said, I'm not 100% sold on Tuck.

Thanks and realize this one is really pretty dicey with personal preferences, so appreciate anyone's objective thoughts.