Devastated

Well after taking the test the first time and bombing the math section (I got a 640 Q:38 V:40), I decided to hit the OG and study my butt off for round 2 vs. the GMAT.

I did a ton of problems, looked over the mistakes etc. I was up to a 690 on the GMATPrep retakes when disaster struck. I took a GMATPrep and did well on the math but poorly on the verbal. I started using the Manhattan GMATPrep book for sentence correction and actually started getting more wrong. Then my strong points in reading comp and critical reasoning started to fail me - I have no clue why.

So I took a little time off, refocused. Decided not to take anymore practice tests for fear of further burnout. I did some problems out of the forums here and working in the official guide. I felt comfortable, I also looked over the mistakes I made on the practice tests and could correctly choose the right answers.

Today was test day and I woke up feeling this was it. I am prepared to get my dream score and show the GMAT who its daddy is. I arrived early, hoping to start the test around 11 - and they let me. Writing section was a breeze. So I took my 10 minute break (there is no clock in the center for you to see), went to the bathroom, drank some water, and paced - while chatting with the test admins. I got worried so I asked if it had been 10 minutes and they went to check my computer (the same computer I got the 640 on might I add). To my surprise it was exactly 10 min so I had to rush to my seat and actually went over break time by 75 seconds.

This put me in the wrong frame of mind, but I settled down and got the firest question right...hit my stride on the math but I got rattled about halfway through and lost focus. I recovered in parts but overall I felt I did about the same as my first official GMAT.

Took my second break, didnt take the full 10 mins because I didnt want the same thing to happen. I focused and took my time, maybe a little too much time. Halfway through the section I got worried about time and had to speed things up - overall I felt I was doing ok. The CR questions were tougher then I remembered, and the reading comp were challenging but nothing I wasnt prepared for.

At the end of the test I pressed report scores and closed my eyes. When I opened them I was shocked.

Q: 43 an improvement of 5 points
V: 31 a loss of 9 points
Total: 610

I am not sure if it was a fluke or what. I dont even know how it would be possible to lose so much ground on the verbal section, something I haven't struggled with at all throughout my studying until the last week of practice tests.

I left, the woman handed me my score (she knew I was trying to do better in the math section - she had been there the first time I took it) and she said to me I should be pleasantly surprised. I took the paper, didnt say a word and rushed out.

Right now I am not sure where I stand. Four of my schools have the first score report and only that score report. But I know a 640 will probably not be enough to get me in. At the same time I have been living the GMAT for 5 months straight. I am tired of it, but I want to beat it. I know many on this board have had the same struggle - but man I felt like I had been stabbed in the chest when I saw that score. Especially because I was sure it would be the math that was lower.