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Please rate my essay (Princeton rating: 4/6)

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Please rate my essay (Princeton rating: 4/6) [#permalink] New post 16 Apr 2013, 01:18
Essay Topic

"Seven years ago, Zephyr Industries had no problem recruiting qualified candidates from college campuses. This year, however, Zephyr has hired only three qualified interns, fewer than one-quarter of those hired in each of the three preceding years. This suggests that the company's recruitment efforts need to be revamped. Since a growing number of potential recruits learn of career opportunities via social media and online discussion boards, Zephyr should suspend its campus recruitment efforts and instead hire social media consultants."

My Answer:
The author of the argument states that seven years ago Zephyr Industries did not face any problems in recruiting qualified candidates from college campuses. However, this year, only 3 candidates have been hired, which is less than one fourth of those hired in each of the last three years. According to author, recruitment efforts need to be revamped by suspending the campus recruitment efforts and hiring social media consultants. However, the argument as stated, lack reasonable evidence, is based on false assumption. There is no logical correlation between the evidence and the conclusion.

Firstly, the author assumes that Zephyr Industries is facing recruitment problems as it has recruited only three interns this year. This assumption of author has no basis. The author further assumes that only three recruits is on account of lack in recruitment efforts. There may be many other factors. There might be a case that due to excessive hiring in the previous years, Zephyr Industries does not have many vacancies. The company is recruiting people as per its requirement. The author has not considered all the factors.

Secondly, author has drawn illogical conclusion of suspending college campus recruitment efforts and hiring a social media consultant. The author does not consider the fact that the quality of recruits available at college campus is far better than those available via social media. Brilliant candidates are often selected by the companies directly at the college through campus placements. Those candidates who are not selected at the campus, search out for job opportunities through social media and online discussion boards. Thus, the author has not considered all the factors in concluding that the campus placements shall be suspended.

In Conclusion, the argument of the author, lacks proper evidence and is based on un-viable assumptions. To strengthen the argument the author should have provided as to what factors are lacking in college recruitment process. The author should have also provided in what ways the recruitment of candidates is better through social media rather than college campus. Thus, in absence of the proper evidence, the argument is unsustainable.


Please provide your valuable comments. I am aiming a score of more than 5.
Please rate my essay (Princeton rating: 4/6)   [#permalink] 16 Apr 2013, 01:18
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Please rate my essay (Princeton rating: 4/6)

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