Please rate the following AWA
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07 Jul 2016, 13:23
Any feedback would be much appreciated on what the following essay could rate.
The following appeared in a memorandum from the directors of a security and safety consulting service:
“Our research indicates that over the past six years no incidents of employee theft have been reported within 10 of the companies that have been our clients. In analyzing the security practices of these 10 companies, we have further learned that each of them requires its employees to wear photo identification badges while at work. In the future, therefore, we should recommend the use of such identification badges to all of our clients.” Discuss how well reasoned . . . etc.
In the memo to the directors of a security and safety consulting service, the author argued that the firm should recommend the use of photo identification badges to all their clients. The author based this conclusion by basing it on their research which indicated that 10 of the firm’s clients had reported no incidents of employee thefts in the past six years. While the author may have a valid argument, several factors have been left out of the report which could weaken his argument. In the following paragraphs, I shall outline how the author could have strengthened his/her argument by presenting information on the entire pool of their clients, failing to incorporate other security factors that could have masked the reporting statistics and not providing additional information on the firm’s role in the past 6 years and prior to the 6 years.
First, let us examine the author’s specific mention of 10 of the firm’s clients. By doing so, the author has failed to convey to the readers of the memorandum, whether this number is a significant portion of the firm’s client base. For instance, if the firm’s entire client base is just the 10 clients, then the author has an exceptional reason to make the recommendation a part of the firm’s modus operandi with every new client. On the other hand, if the firm has 500 clients, of whom, only 10 have not reported any thefts, then this statistic could be the result of the upstanding nature of the employees at those 10 firms. Therefore, by framing the argument against a larger sample of clients – if appropriate – the author could have provided considerable support for the argument.
In addition, by attributing the lack of thefts to the photo identification badges, the author may have committed a significant mistake by looking for the only sole common factor in the security features that may have been deployed by the clients. If each client had used multiple security solutions with the photo identification badges being only one component of the security program, then the author may have done a disservice to the argument and in turn, to all future clients, by only suggesting the use of photo identification badges. On the other hand, if the clients in question had only used photo identification as the sole security feature, then the author can undoubtedly bolster the argument by including that fact in the memorandum.
Furthermore, the author mentions that no thefts had occurred in the past 6 years. This raises the question as to why the author chose this particular time frame in his research and the ensuing report. If the firm had suggested the use of photo identification badges to combat theft and/or was replaced by another security firm, then these pieces of information this could be a significant advantage to the author’s argument and demonstrate the firm’s success in boosting security. However, by conspicuously leaving out the firm’s role in bolstering the security of the firms, the author may have unwittingly weakened their position.
In conclusion, by failing to provide added information on the firm’s client base, assuming that the lack of reported theft at the client’s was due to the use of a photo identification badge, and not providing details on the firm’s exact role with the clients in the past 6 years and prior, the author has presented an argument that lacks support. However, by employing the various solutions presented in this essay, the author can better the argument considerably.