Please rate my essay
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18 Dec 2018, 08:24
Dear participants,
I'd be grateful if you could give me feedback on my essay:
Task: (Independent Essay):
Some young adults want independence from their parents as soon as possible.
Other young adults prefer to live with their families for a longer time. Which
of these situations do you think is better? Use specific reasons and examples
to support your opinion. Be sure to use your own words. Do not use
memorized examples.
Essay.
Currently some young adults start living on their own at an early age, while the others are eager to remain with their families for a longer period. In the following essay, I will briefly outline both positions and state my opinion.
At some point of life, young adults choose to move away from their parents and rent an apartment or start living in a shared flat with their friends. In this light, the decision to start living on one’s own comes naturally as part of personal growth and maturation process. Meanwhile, it is important to consider that some young adults tend to overestimate their ability to support themselves both financially and socially and hence they may come across unforeseen challenges. Yet every challenge may also come in the shape of a“blessing in disguise” and teach crucial lessons, so eventually, the young adult becomes self-sufficient and mature.
Some young people also prefer to stay longer with their parents. Most likely, the intent to stay with the family is driven by financial considerations as it makes little sense to allocate supplemental sums to rent an additional apartment. Apart from this, the desire to stay with the parents might be closely linked to the “comfort zone” as long as the young adult is not preoccupied with the issues related to household and can benefit from all the conveniences. At certain stages of life such decision might seem quite reasonable. Supposing a young person devotes all the attention to completing a final thesis or a person is undergoing a life crisis. Under these circumstances, it is quite comprehensible that a person may need the support of the family, since he or she is temporarily unable to care for household and pay the bills.
Taking all factors into consideration, I would like to make the case for living separately from parents.
I believe living on one’s own significantly fosters personal growth and development. A person learns to take responsibility, starts working and receiving real-world experience, and hence grows personally and professionally.