GMAT DEPRESSION...
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09 Sep 2008, 12:29
At last I have finished studying Powerscore GMAT bible. To be very honest, I read it in so many small episodes that I really feel that I need to thoroughly read it again.
GMAT is slowly killing me... I need psychological help...
Days are passing by very quickly. I am lazy mostly because of confused action plan. I have so many books/information with me that I have no clue at all where should I start studying.
I keep thinking, will I do all of this or will I just do some books. Although I know its about quality of studies but the excess of information is making me crazy.
I am working four hours everyday (kind of a consultant) so I have fair time to prepare. Next question that makes me crazy is, "should I study like 5 hours on a working day and 8 hours on a weekend, or should I study 3 hours every day, or should I study in the morning, should I study in evening....." Different no of combination that I keep deciding and switching in between are almost unlimited. I feel exhausted if I study more, on the other hand I feel guilty if I study less.
I have that "perfectionist" stupid nature when it comes to studies that rarely helps. At the end of day I end up doing very perfect job on a very small portion of the mega task in hand.
There is a constant cycle of doing little and then feeling guilty that is actually disturbing me a lot. I am a victim of "GMAT DEPRESSION".
When I go to market with my family, I take some book with me. When I go to doctor, I take a book with me. I take book me with everywhere. I take it to work. I think i need to quit this.
I am even in a dilemma whether I should go for tracking everyday or not (takes about 1.5 hour for me to drive to the mountain, climb up 2 kilometers, climb down and reach back home).
I keep counting the days left till the test, making different time tables.
I have following with me
Books: OG10&11, Kaplan, kaplan verbal workbook, Arco, Peterson, Manhattan SC,Powerescore CR bible, barrons
Software: GMAT prep, PowerPrep, Kaplan Cd that comes with book
I can imagine how stupid I might sound telling all these problems with my GMAT prep but I can not share this with people around me who are not in GMAT MODE. They will never understand.
Perhaps some of you who have suffered from similar lack of commitment while preparing will understand my misery.
I need someone to give me a shut up call, someone to tell me to get rid of useless books, someone to tell me the science behind the no of hours.
I know that spoon feeding teaches you nothing at the end of the day except the shape of the spoon itself. Still I would be very thankful if someone proposes just an outline of action plan. e.g sequence of books that I should do in next couple of weeks. or the outline of things that i sould complete in Month-1, Month2, Month3
Another problem is that the section that I focus becomes quite well but my performance in other sections (eg the one that i prepared last week) decreases as soon as i lose contact with these.
If I commit suicide (just joking...) it will be because of Data Sufficiency,No. properties and Probability.
I am very sleepy and tired and frustrated at the moment. Please ignore "spelling/grammar/lack of communication" mistakes if any. Consider them "careless errors" instead of "concept errors"...