Please rate my Essay (AWA - Argument)
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11 Oct 2009, 00:10
Argument:
A recent nationwide study of high schools reveals that the percentage of students who graduate on time is higher for private schools than for public schools. For this reason, Bedford Falls parents who want their children to graduate from high school on time should send their children to private schools.
My Answer:
In this argument, the author concludes that parents who want their children to graduate from high school on time, should send their children to private school. The author's line of reasoning is through a nationwide study on high schools that says percentage of students graduating from private school is higher than that of public schools. This argument is seriously flawed due to limited information on number of schools surveyed, place, and the year this article was published.
Firstly, the credibility of the nationwide survey needs to be considered. As there is no information relating to how the survey was conducted and the parameters defining the survey, the only support to the reasoning of author's argument is weakened.
Secondly, to compare the percentage of students graduating, we need to know the 80% median percentage of students graduating from the schools. Because, there could be cases where few schools contribute very less pass percentage making the entire public schools pass percentage less than private schools.
Thirdly, the quality of education and standard could be higher in public schools making it difficult for the students to graduate on time. This means that comparing the public and private schools in survey is pretty convoluted. The author makes several assumptions in matching analysis criteria while concluding. Here, information regarding quality and standards of both public and private schools need to be considered before concluding.
In sum, the author's argument on sending children to private schools is neither persuasive nor convincing. Had it included aforementioned points, the information-starved argument would not only be made strengthened and bolstered but also persuasive and convincing.
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