UNSTOPPABLE12 wrote:
Hello
MartyTargetTestPrep,
I was wondering whether you could provide your opinion regarding answer choice D, what are the flaws in the sentence is it the use of when? ( some posts claim that in erroneously modifies "brain growth" but I think it could be mice too)
Here's the version created via the use of (D).
Recently documented examples of neurogenesis, the production of new brain cells, include the brain growth in mice when placed in a stimulating environment or the increase in canaries' neurons when they learn new songs.This part all makes sense: Recently documented examples of neurogenesis, the production of new brain cells, include the brain growth in mice
Here's the first spot in which it goes wrong: the brain growth in mice when placed in a stimulating environment
Notice that what that basically says is this: the brain growth
in mice when placed in a stimulating environment
It doesn't say what is placed in a stimulating environment. Something is placed in a stimulating environment, but that can't be brain growth, because the brain growth happens when something else is "placed in a stimulating environment."
Also, the sentence does not say that the mice are placed in a stimulating environment. So, this version leaves out a key thing, what exactly is placed in a stimulating environment.
Furthermore, "when placed in a stimulating environment" has to modify a verb. Something happens "when," such as "when placed in a stimulating environment, mice
experience brain growth," or "the brain growth
seen in mice when
they are placed in a stimulating environment," but no verb is present for "when placed in a stimulating environment" to modify.
The next issue is here: the increases in canaries' neurons
What exactly is an increase in canaries' neurons? The sentence does not say "increases in the number of neurons" or "increases in the sizes of neurons." It does not even say what (E) says, "an an increase in neurons in canaries," which is certainly not ideal but at least makes some sense. It says simply "increases in canaries' neurons,'" as if the neurons themselves somehow experience increases.
Objects can't increase. For example, this does not make sense. "After the rain, we observed increases in the tree's apples." The were increases in the apples themselves? Doesn't make sense.
So, "increases in canaries' neurons" doesn't make sense either.
The use of "they" is not ideal but not terrible. We can tell that the neurons don't learn new songs. So, "they" must refer to "canaries." The fact that "canaries''' is in the possessive form is not a clear flaw, at least in GMAT SC terms, because there are SC questions in which the correct answer includes a pronoun that refers to a noun in the possessive form. That said, the fact that "they" somehow seems to refer to "neurons" does add to the case for finding a choice better than this one.
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