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26 Oct 2022, 09:55
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Please rate my essay
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The following appeared as part of a memorandum from the vice president of Nostrum, a large pharmaceutical corporation:
“The proposal to increase the health and retirement benefits that our employees receive should not be implemented at this time. An increase in these benefits is not only financially unjustified, since our last year’s profits were lower than those of the preceding year, but also unnecessary, since our chief competitor, Panacea, offers its employees lower health and retirement benefits than we currently offer. We can assume that our employees are reasonably satisfied with the health and retirement benefits that they now have since a recent survey indicated that two-thirds of the respondents viewed them favorably.”
Discuss how well reasoned . . . etc.
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The VP of Nostrum, a pharmaceutical company, argues that the proposal to increase the health and retirement benefits received by the employees should not be implemented at the moment, and bases this suggestion on a number of reasons. Not only is the line of reasoning flawed, but the argument also makes several uncorroborated assumptions that must be addressed.
Firstly, the argument states that the proposed increase is unnecessary because Panacea, the company’s main competitor, offers lower health and retirement benefits. Not only does the argument fail to provide any evidence to confirm these claims about Panacea’s employee benefits, but also fails to share any context on this comparison. What metrics have been used to compare the employee benefits for the companies? Do Nostrum and Panacea have comparable employee size? Even if Panacea’s employees have lower health and retirement benefits, as compared to Nostrum’s employees, is it possible that Panacea provides its employees with higher salaries, therefore compensating for the benefits? Without understanding how the employee benefits of the two companies have been compared, the argument holds little strength to questioning.
Secondly, the argument also assumes that the employees of Nostrum are satisfied with the current employee benefits provided to them. This assumption is solely based on the results of a recent survey. What was the intent of the survey? Were all employees of the firm included in this survey? If the survey was conducted for a small sample, the results may not capture the employees’ true feedback.
As explained in the above line, the argument, as it stands, is flawed and makes a weak case against the proposal’s implementation.
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The following appeared as part of a memorandum from the vice president of Nostrum, a large pharmaceutical corporation:
“The proposal to increase the health and retirement benefits that our employees receive should not be implemented at this time. An increase in these benefits is not only financially unjustified, since our last year’s profits were lower than those of the preceding year, but also unnecessary, since our chief competitor, Panacea, offers its employees lower health and retirement benefits than we currently offer. We can assume that our employees are reasonably satisfied with the health and retirement benefits that they now have since a recent survey indicated that two-thirds of the respondents viewed them favorably.”
Discuss how well reasoned . . . etc.
-------------------------------------------------
The VP of Nostrum, a pharmaceutical company, argues that the proposal to increase the health and retirement benefits received by the employees should not be implemented at the moment, and bases this suggestion on a number of reasons. Not only is the line of reasoning flawed, but the argument also makes several uncorroborated assumptions that must be addressed.
Firstly, the argument states that the proposed increase is unnecessary because Panacea, the company’s main competitor, offers lower health and retirement benefits. Not only does the argument fail to provide any evidence to confirm these claims about Panacea’s employee benefits, but also fails to share any context on this comparison. What metrics have been used to compare the employee benefits for the companies? Do Nostrum and Panacea have comparable employee size? Even if Panacea’s employees have lower health and retirement benefits, as compared to Nostrum’s employees, is it possible that Panacea provides its employees with higher salaries, therefore compensating for the benefits? Without understanding how the employee benefits of the two companies have been compared, the argument holds little strength to questioning.
Secondly, the argument also assumes that the employees of Nostrum are satisfied with the current employee benefits provided to them. This assumption is solely based on the results of a recent survey. What was the intent of the survey? Were all employees of the firm included in this survey? If the survey was conducted for a small sample, the results may not capture the employees’ true feedback.
As explained in the above line, the argument, as it stands, is flawed and makes a weak case against the proposal’s implementation.
27 Oct 2022, 02:44
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AWA Score: 5.5 out of 6
Coherence and connectivity: 5/5
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.
Paragraph structure and formation: 4.5/5
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.
Vocabulary and word expression: 4.5/5
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!
Coherence and connectivity: 5/5
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.
Paragraph structure and formation: 4.5/5
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.
Vocabulary and word expression: 4.5/5
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!
Good Luck
coolgirl123
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