Events & Promotions
|
|
GMAT Club Daily Prep
Thank you for using the timer - this advanced tool can estimate your performance and suggest more practice questions. We have subscribed you to Daily Prep Questions via email.
Customized
for You
Track
Your Progress
Practice
Pays
Not interested in getting valuable practice questions and articles delivered to your email? No problem, unsubscribe here.
Apr 2512:30 AM EDT
-01:30 AM EDT
At one point, she believed GMAT wasn’t for her. After scoring 595, self-doubt crept in and she questioned her potential. But instead of quitting, she made the right strategic changes. The result? A remarkable comeback to 695. Check out how Saakshi did it.
Apr 2601:30 AM EDT
-02:30 AM EDT
Learn how Keshav, a Chartered Accountant, scored an impressive 705 on GMAT in just 30 days with GMATWhiz's expert guidance. In this video, he shares preparation tips and strategies that worked for him, including the mock, time management, and more.
Apr 2610:00 AM EDT
-11:00 AM EDT
The Target Test Prep course represents a quantum leap forward in GMAT preparation, a radical reinterpretation of the way that students should study. Try before you buy with a 5-day, full-access trial of the course for FREE!
Apr 2711:00 AM EDT
-12:00 PM EDT
Prefer video-based learning? The Target Test Prep OnDemand course is a one-of-a-kind video masterclass featuring 400 hours of lecture-style teaching by Scott Woodbury-Stewart, founder of Target Test Prep and one of the most accomplished GMAT instructors
Apr 2808:00 AM PDT
-11:00 AM PDT
Whether you are just beginning your MBA journey or fine-tuning your path to a 700+ score, GMAT Day is designed to give you a competitive edge.
May 0111:00 AM PDT
-12:00 PM PDT
Free- full-length test + 15 concept videos + 150+ short videos + study plan!
03 Sep 2023, 11:11
Kudos
Bookmarks
Hi All, I took the GMAT Prep Mock 5 today and got the following topic as the question. It will be great if someone can kindly rate my AWA essay out of 6. I have stuck with the Chineseburnt's AWA template and would like to know how I have fared overall. Thanks in advance
Topic:
The following appeared in an article in a health–and–fitness magazine:
“Laboratory studies show that Saluda Natural Spring Water contains several of the minerals necessary for good health and that it is completely free of bacteria. Residents of Saluda, the small town where the water is bottled, are hospitalized less frequently than the national average. Even though Saluda Natural Spring Water may seem expensive, drinking it instead of tap water is a wise investment in good health.”
Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counter examples might weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion.
My Essay:
The argument claims that we should consume Saluda Natural Spring Water in order to be healthy and get hospitalize less frequently. Stated this way the argument fails to mention several key factors on the basis of which it could be evaluated and reveals examples of leap of faith and poor reasoning. The conclusion of the argument depends on assumptions for which there is no clear evidence. Hence, the argument is unconvincing and has several flaws.
First, the argument readily assumes that there were no differences in the diet, immunity and fitness regimen between the residents of Saluda and the national average, except that the former group consumed the Saluda Natural Spring Water. This statement is a stretch and not substantiated in any way. The argument could be a lot clearer if it explicitly mentioned that both the groups' health, diet and fitness regimen were similar to begin with.
Secondly, the argument claims that the minerals of the Spring Water is the only cause because of which the residents are less frequently hospitalized. This is again a very weak and unsupported claim as the argument fails to demonstrate any correlation between the actual health benefits of the minerals and the mineral's efficacy to fight several diseases because of which someone can get hospitalized. To illustrate the efficacy of minerals to fight deadly diseases the author could have provided the results of an experiment in which an individual who is not a resident of Saluda was asked to consume the Spring Water and her health considerably improved as a result of this experiment. If the argument had provided this evidence then the argument would have been a lot more convincing.
Finally we are told that consumption of the Saluda Natural Sprint Water is the only way to get the minerals. What if we can supplement ourselves with the minerals externally? Also, we are not told whether the residents of Saluda eats a diet that is extremely healthy and contains the minerals in the food already. Without convincing answers to these questions, one is left with the impression that the argument is based more on wishful thinking than on substantive evidence.
The argument is flawed for the above mentioned reasons. The argument could be considerably strengthened if the author clearly mentioned all the relevant facts. To assess the merits of a situation, it is essential to have the full knowledge of all the contributing factors.
Topic:
The following appeared in an article in a health–and–fitness magazine:
“Laboratory studies show that Saluda Natural Spring Water contains several of the minerals necessary for good health and that it is completely free of bacteria. Residents of Saluda, the small town where the water is bottled, are hospitalized less frequently than the national average. Even though Saluda Natural Spring Water may seem expensive, drinking it instead of tap water is a wise investment in good health.”
Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counter examples might weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion.
My Essay:
The argument claims that we should consume Saluda Natural Spring Water in order to be healthy and get hospitalize less frequently. Stated this way the argument fails to mention several key factors on the basis of which it could be evaluated and reveals examples of leap of faith and poor reasoning. The conclusion of the argument depends on assumptions for which there is no clear evidence. Hence, the argument is unconvincing and has several flaws.
First, the argument readily assumes that there were no differences in the diet, immunity and fitness regimen between the residents of Saluda and the national average, except that the former group consumed the Saluda Natural Spring Water. This statement is a stretch and not substantiated in any way. The argument could be a lot clearer if it explicitly mentioned that both the groups' health, diet and fitness regimen were similar to begin with.
Secondly, the argument claims that the minerals of the Spring Water is the only cause because of which the residents are less frequently hospitalized. This is again a very weak and unsupported claim as the argument fails to demonstrate any correlation between the actual health benefits of the minerals and the mineral's efficacy to fight several diseases because of which someone can get hospitalized. To illustrate the efficacy of minerals to fight deadly diseases the author could have provided the results of an experiment in which an individual who is not a resident of Saluda was asked to consume the Spring Water and her health considerably improved as a result of this experiment. If the argument had provided this evidence then the argument would have been a lot more convincing.
Finally we are told that consumption of the Saluda Natural Sprint Water is the only way to get the minerals. What if we can supplement ourselves with the minerals externally? Also, we are not told whether the residents of Saluda eats a diet that is extremely healthy and contains the minerals in the food already. Without convincing answers to these questions, one is left with the impression that the argument is based more on wishful thinking than on substantive evidence.
The argument is flawed for the above mentioned reasons. The argument could be considerably strengthened if the author clearly mentioned all the relevant facts. To assess the merits of a situation, it is essential to have the full knowledge of all the contributing factors.
05 Sep 2023, 11:57
Kudos
Bookmarks
AWA Score: 5 out of 6
Coherence and Connectivity: 4.5/6
The essay maintains reasonable coherence and connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. However, there are some abrupt transitions and sentence structures that could be improved for smoother flow.
Word Structure: 5/6
The word structure in the essay is generally sound, with a variety of sentence structures used effectively. Some sentences could be further refined for clarity and conciseness.
Paragraph Structure and Formation: 4.5/6
The essay has a decent paragraph structure, but some paragraphs are longer than necessary and could be broken down into smaller, more focused ones. This would improve the organization and readability of the essay.
Language and Grammar: 5/6
The language and grammar are generally strong, with few noticeable errors. However, there are a few instances where sentence structure could be improved for greater clarity.
Vocabulary and Word Expression: 4.5/6
The essay employs a decent vocabulary, but there is room for improvement in terms of word choice and expression. Some phrases and sentences could be more eloquently phrased to enhance the overall quality of writing.
Overall, this essay demonstrates a reasonably strong understanding of the argument's flaws and weaknesses. It effectively identifies questionable assumptions and provides suggestions for strengthening the argument. However, there is room for improvement in terms of coherence, paragraph structure, and vocabulary usage to enhance the overall quality of the analysis.
Coherence and Connectivity: 4.5/6
The essay maintains reasonable coherence and connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. However, there are some abrupt transitions and sentence structures that could be improved for smoother flow.
Word Structure: 5/6
The word structure in the essay is generally sound, with a variety of sentence structures used effectively. Some sentences could be further refined for clarity and conciseness.
Paragraph Structure and Formation: 4.5/6
The essay has a decent paragraph structure, but some paragraphs are longer than necessary and could be broken down into smaller, more focused ones. This would improve the organization and readability of the essay.
Language and Grammar: 5/6
The language and grammar are generally strong, with few noticeable errors. However, there are a few instances where sentence structure could be improved for greater clarity.
Vocabulary and Word Expression: 4.5/6
The essay employs a decent vocabulary, but there is room for improvement in terms of word choice and expression. Some phrases and sentences could be more eloquently phrased to enhance the overall quality of writing.
Overall, this essay demonstrates a reasonably strong understanding of the argument's flaws and weaknesses. It effectively identifies questionable assumptions and provides suggestions for strengthening the argument. However, there is room for improvement in terms of coherence, paragraph structure, and vocabulary usage to enhance the overall quality of the analysis.
SuryaGanguly
Moderator:
