Thanks in advance for evaluating my essay!
The following appeared in an article in a health–and–fitness magazine:
“Laboratory studies show that Saluda Natural Spring Water contains several of the minerals necessary for good health and that it is completely free of bacteria. Residents of Saluda, the small town where the water is bottled, are hospitalized less frequently than the national average. Even though Saluda Natural Spring Water may seem expensive, drinking it instead of tap water is a wise investment in good health.”
My answer: The argument claims that drinking Saluda Natural Spring Water is a wise investment in good health. However, the argument fails to take into account several key factors and relies on assumptions for which there is no clear evidence. Therefore, the argument is unconvincing and breaks down easily.
First, the argument readily assumes that the residents of Saluda are drinking Saluda Natural Spring Water, and not alternatives like tap water or bottled water from other brands. This assumption is a stretch because despite residents living in the town of Saluda, there is no evidence proving that Saluda residents indeed drink Saluda Natural Spring Water. Unless the residents were drinking exclusively Saluda Natural Spring Water, we would not be able to isolate the effect of drinking Saluda Natural Spring Water on residents' health. The argument would have been much stronger if it proved this through, for example, a survey asking Saluda residents what types of water they drink.
Secondly, the argument fails to consider other factors that influence the residents of Saluda's health. The lower hospitalization rate for residents of Saluda, in comparison to the national average, is not necessarily caused by drinking Saluda Natural Spring Water. The residents of Saluda could have healthier habits, such as having a nutritious, balanced diet and exercising regularly, than the rest of the nation. If these habits are indeed true, then the company that produces Saluda Natural Spring Water is essentially taking credit for these residents' good health and stating that it is the quality of our water, not any other lifestyle factors, that gives drinkers of it good health.
Finally, the evidence provided by the producers of Saluda Natural Spring Water is inadequate. The sample size - residents of Saluda - is too small and may be unrepresentative of all drinkers of Saluda Natural Spring Water. The results from one town are not enough to make a generalization about the entire nation. It's possible that if the drinkers of Saluda Natural Spring Water across the country were analyzed, there could be a negligible effect of drinking Saluda Natural Spring Water on health. Moreover, there would need to be clear comparisons of health between large, representative samples of Saluda Natural Spring Water drinkers vs. non-Saluda Natural Spring Water drinkers. This would establish more convincingly whether Saluda Natural Spring Water has the effects it claims to have.
In summary, the conclusion of this argument is questionable because of its unrepresentative sample and the faulty assumptions aforementioned. If the argument had drawn on the examples as suggested and plugged the holes in its reasoning, then it would have been much more convincing.