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05 Sep 2015, 11:55
Kudos
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Can somebody please review my first AWA? I will review on of your AWA if you want me to 
Prompt:
In order to save a considerable amount of money, Rockingham’s century-old town hall should be torn down and replaced by the larger and more energy-efficient building that some citizens have proposed. The old town hall is too small to comfortably accommodate the number of people who are employed by the town. In addition, it is very costly to heat the old hall in winter and cool it in summer. The new, larger building would be more energy efficient, costing less per square foot to heat and cool than the old hall. Furthermore, it would be possible to rent out some of the space in the new building, thereby generating income for the town of Rockingham.
Answer:
In the passage, the author argues that the century-old Rockingham’s town hall be torn down and a new larger town hall be built in its place and that this will save considerable amount of money for the town. This is based on multiple premises. Firstly, the author argues that heating or cooling per square foot of the new town hall will be considerably cheaper. Secondly, because the new town hall will be much larger, it will be possible to rent out some space in the new town hall to outsiders, thus making more money for the town. However, on deeper analysis, it becomes apparent that there are certain aspects that have not been taken into consideration, leading to a number of questionable assumptions and logical flaws.
One such flaw is that there is no indication of the total cost of heating or cooling the new building. We only know that the cost of cooling or heating per square foot of the new building is less than that of the old town hall. However, as we do not have the comparison between the total sizes of the old town hall and the new building, we cannot assume that the total cost of cooling or heating will also be less. It might be the case, owing to the fact that the new town hall will be considerably bigger in size, the total cost of cooling and heating in fact turns out to be much larger. To strengthen the argument, the author should compare the total size of the old town hall and the new building and the cost of heating or cooling per square foot of both the old town hall and the new building.
Moreover, the author’s argument is incorrectly based on the assumption that money can only be saved by taking into consideration the cost of heating or cooling the town hall. There are multiple other factors which comes in when we find the total cost of running and maintaining a town hall. Some of the other considerations could be having restrooms, vending machines, and running water. As the new town hall would be much larger in size than the old town hall, the costs of these other factors could be much larger for the new town hall. We cannot just base the conclusion that the new town hall will cost less money by comparing only one factor. To overcome this flaw, the argument should mention and take into account the other factors which influence the total cost of running and maintaining a town hall.
The author also wrongly assumes that the town hall would definitely find people who would want to rent parts of the new town hall. This assumption is unfounded because we do not know whether this will be case. It might be the case that town hall does not meet the criteria of local businesses or offices who rent out space. The town hall might not be located where businesses have offices. We are also not sure whether the rent that the town hall could get would be enough to justify building a bigger town hall; it might be that the rents are too low. To render this argument more valid, the author should demonstrate that, by way of presenting data from a survey, that people or businesses are indeed interested in renting out from the new town hall and that the rents they are prepared to pay are at market rates and that the rents would be enough to justify the extra space.
After closer examination of the passage presented, it becomes apparent that there are several logical flaws. The recommendations in the essay show how the argument may be strengthened and made more logically sound.
Prompt:
In order to save a considerable amount of money, Rockingham’s century-old town hall should be torn down and replaced by the larger and more energy-efficient building that some citizens have proposed. The old town hall is too small to comfortably accommodate the number of people who are employed by the town. In addition, it is very costly to heat the old hall in winter and cool it in summer. The new, larger building would be more energy efficient, costing less per square foot to heat and cool than the old hall. Furthermore, it would be possible to rent out some of the space in the new building, thereby generating income for the town of Rockingham.
Answer:
In the passage, the author argues that the century-old Rockingham’s town hall be torn down and a new larger town hall be built in its place and that this will save considerable amount of money for the town. This is based on multiple premises. Firstly, the author argues that heating or cooling per square foot of the new town hall will be considerably cheaper. Secondly, because the new town hall will be much larger, it will be possible to rent out some space in the new town hall to outsiders, thus making more money for the town. However, on deeper analysis, it becomes apparent that there are certain aspects that have not been taken into consideration, leading to a number of questionable assumptions and logical flaws.
One such flaw is that there is no indication of the total cost of heating or cooling the new building. We only know that the cost of cooling or heating per square foot of the new building is less than that of the old town hall. However, as we do not have the comparison between the total sizes of the old town hall and the new building, we cannot assume that the total cost of cooling or heating will also be less. It might be the case, owing to the fact that the new town hall will be considerably bigger in size, the total cost of cooling and heating in fact turns out to be much larger. To strengthen the argument, the author should compare the total size of the old town hall and the new building and the cost of heating or cooling per square foot of both the old town hall and the new building.
Moreover, the author’s argument is incorrectly based on the assumption that money can only be saved by taking into consideration the cost of heating or cooling the town hall. There are multiple other factors which comes in when we find the total cost of running and maintaining a town hall. Some of the other considerations could be having restrooms, vending machines, and running water. As the new town hall would be much larger in size than the old town hall, the costs of these other factors could be much larger for the new town hall. We cannot just base the conclusion that the new town hall will cost less money by comparing only one factor. To overcome this flaw, the argument should mention and take into account the other factors which influence the total cost of running and maintaining a town hall.
The author also wrongly assumes that the town hall would definitely find people who would want to rent parts of the new town hall. This assumption is unfounded because we do not know whether this will be case. It might be the case that town hall does not meet the criteria of local businesses or offices who rent out space. The town hall might not be located where businesses have offices. We are also not sure whether the rent that the town hall could get would be enough to justify building a bigger town hall; it might be that the rents are too low. To render this argument more valid, the author should demonstrate that, by way of presenting data from a survey, that people or businesses are indeed interested in renting out from the new town hall and that the rents they are prepared to pay are at market rates and that the rents would be enough to justify the extra space.
After closer examination of the passage presented, it becomes apparent that there are several logical flaws. The recommendations in the essay show how the argument may be strengthened and made more logically sound.
Moderator:
