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28 Jan 2022, 15:20
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Hello, Could someone review my AWA, please? Thank you in advance
The following appeared in the opinion column of a financial magazine:
“On average, middle-aged consumers devote 39 percent of their retail expenditure to department store products and
services, while for younger consumers the average is only 25 percent. Since the number of middle-aged people will
increase dramatically within the next decade, department stores can expect retail sales to increase significantly
during that period. Furthermore, to take advantage of the trend, these stores should begin to replace some of those
products intended to attract the younger consumer with products intended to attract the middle-aged consumer.”
Discuss how well reasoned . . . etc.
The argument concludes that in the next decade, the retail store should exchange their products to attract the middle-aged group of people rather than the younger generation. According to the author, on average, middle-aged customers spending more on department store products than the younger clients. Following that fact, the premises in this argument stated that the department store will significantly increase their sales in the next decade due to the increase of the middle-ages population. However, this argument is flawed and prey to assumptions that calls the conclusion of the argument into question.
Firstly, the argument assumes rapidly that the number of middle-aged people will increase meaning that the retail sales will increase accordingly with it. Nevertheless, the author ignores to compare it to the number of the new generation of the younger consumers. There is a possibility that the population of the young customers will increase more dynamically than the middle-aged group of clients. Therefore, the retail shop might be able to sell more for the young clientele during the next decade due to the younger generation representing the majority of the retail shop consumers.
Secondly, the author forgets to consider the possibility of change in the customer’s demand of product. As trends drastically change, one should not assume that the trend will stay the same for the next 10 years. During that period, the middle-aged and the young consumers could have different needs and wants than the generation buying retail products before them. Therefore, we cannot predict the customer’s behaviour as they are diverse people requiring various products.
To conclude, this argument is flawed for the reasons indicated. The retail shops must adapt to the demand of the current clientele with their products instead of changing their strategies too early in advance which can lead the business to loss. The owners need to analyse their client’s needs and offer what they seek for.
The following appeared in the opinion column of a financial magazine:
“On average, middle-aged consumers devote 39 percent of their retail expenditure to department store products and
services, while for younger consumers the average is only 25 percent. Since the number of middle-aged people will
increase dramatically within the next decade, department stores can expect retail sales to increase significantly
during that period. Furthermore, to take advantage of the trend, these stores should begin to replace some of those
products intended to attract the younger consumer with products intended to attract the middle-aged consumer.”
Discuss how well reasoned . . . etc.
The argument concludes that in the next decade, the retail store should exchange their products to attract the middle-aged group of people rather than the younger generation. According to the author, on average, middle-aged customers spending more on department store products than the younger clients. Following that fact, the premises in this argument stated that the department store will significantly increase their sales in the next decade due to the increase of the middle-ages population. However, this argument is flawed and prey to assumptions that calls the conclusion of the argument into question.
Firstly, the argument assumes rapidly that the number of middle-aged people will increase meaning that the retail sales will increase accordingly with it. Nevertheless, the author ignores to compare it to the number of the new generation of the younger consumers. There is a possibility that the population of the young customers will increase more dynamically than the middle-aged group of clients. Therefore, the retail shop might be able to sell more for the young clientele during the next decade due to the younger generation representing the majority of the retail shop consumers.
Secondly, the author forgets to consider the possibility of change in the customer’s demand of product. As trends drastically change, one should not assume that the trend will stay the same for the next 10 years. During that period, the middle-aged and the young consumers could have different needs and wants than the generation buying retail products before them. Therefore, we cannot predict the customer’s behaviour as they are diverse people requiring various products.
To conclude, this argument is flawed for the reasons indicated. The retail shops must adapt to the demand of the current clientele with their products instead of changing their strategies too early in advance which can lead the business to loss. The owners need to analyse their client’s needs and offer what they seek for.
29 Jan 2022, 03:28
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AWA Score: 5.5 - 6 out of 6
I have used a GMAT AWA auto-grader to evaluate your essay.
Coherence and connectivity: 5/5
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.
Paragraph structure and formation: 5/5
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.
Vocabulary and word expression: 4.5/5
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!
I have used a GMAT AWA auto-grader to evaluate your essay.
Coherence and connectivity: 5/5
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.
Paragraph structure and formation: 5/5
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.
Vocabulary and word expression: 4.5/5
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!
Good Luck
majaele
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