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awa evaluation

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Intern
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Joined: 16 Aug 2017
Posts: 3

Kudos [?]: 0 [0], given: 16

awa evaluation [#permalink]

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New post 01 Dec 2017, 08:19
The following appeared in an article in a health and fitness magazine:

"Scientific research has shown that Clear-One Bottled Water has many minerals needed for good health and that it is totally free of bacteria. Residents of the town where the water is bottled get sick less frequently than the national average. Even though Clear-One is higher-priced than the other bottled waters, it is a good long-term investment in your health."




The argument concludes that Clear-One bottled water is a good long term investment in one's health. The rationale provided is - 1) it is free of bacteria and has many minerals needed for good health 2) residents of the town where the water is bottled get sick less frequently than the national average. However, stated this way the argument fails to consider several key factors on the basis of which it can be evaluated. It relies on assumptions for which there is no clear evdience. Hence, the argument is rather flawed and unconvincing.

First, the argument assumes that the residents of the town, where the Clear-One bottled water is bottled, consume the same bottled water. This statement is a stretch and cannot be substantiated. For instance, it is possible that the residents in that town don't consume Clear-One bottled water. The reason they fall sick less frequently could be the normal tap water they consume, other eating habits, regular exercise ec. Had the argument explicitly stated that the residents of the town where Clear-One water is bottled consume the same water and consuming this water is the reaon they fall sick less frequently, the argument would be much clearer.

Second, the argument states that the Clear-One bottled water contains minerals needed for good health and that it is totally free of bacteria. However, as the argument provides no data for the amount of minerals and bacteria in the other sources of water, one cannot conclude that Clear-One bottled water is a good long term investment. It is possible that tap water has many more minerals than Clear-One bottled water and is better for one's health as compared to Clear-One bottled water. In such a scenario, Clear-One bottled water will not be a good long term investment as it has fewer minerals than tap water and it is more expensive than tap water. Had the argument included details of the mineral and bacteria content of other water sources, it would be more convincing.

Finally, the argument concludes that even though Clear-One bottled water is expensive, it is a good long term investment. However, to arrive at this conclusion, answers to several key questions must be provided. Is Clear-One bottled water better in quality when compared to other resources? Do residents of the town, where Clear-One bottled water is bottled, get sick less frequently than the national average because they consume Clear-One bottled water? Without answers to these questions, the argument is more of a wishful claim than substantive.

In conclusion, the argument is weak and unconvincing. It can be strengthened if it includes details of the mineral and bacteria content of other water sources and demonstrates that Clear-One bottled water is better than the other water sources. Without further details and answers to the questions stated above, this argument is open to debate.

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awa evaluation [#permalink]

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New post 01 Dec 2017, 11:42
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gag6kaur wrote:
The following appeared in an article in a health and fitness magazine:

"Scientific research has shown that Clear-One Bottled Water has many minerals needed for good health and that it is totally free of bacteria. Residents of the town where the water is bottled get sick less frequently than the national average. Even though Clear-One is higher-priced than the other bottled waters, it is a good long-term investment in your health."




The argument concludes that Clear-One bottled water is a good long term investment in one's health. The rationale provided is - 1) it is free of bacteria and has many minerals needed for good health 2) residents of the town where the water is bottled get sick less frequently than the national average. However, stated this way the argument fails to consider several key factors on the basis of which it can be evaluated. It relies on assumptions for which there is no clear evdience. Hence, the argument is rather flawed and unconvincing.

First, the argument assumes that the residents of the town, where the Clear-One bottled water is bottled, consume the same bottled water. This statement is a stretch and cannot be substantiated. For instance, it is possible that the residents in that town don't consume Clear-One bottled water. The reason they fall sick less frequently could be the normal tap water they consume, other eating habits, regular exercise ec. Had the argument explicitly stated that the residents of the town where Clear-One water is bottled consume the same water and consuming this water is the reaon they fall sick less frequently, the argument would be much clearer.

Second, the argument states that the Clear-One bottled water contains minerals needed for good health and that it is totally free of bacteria. However, as the argument provides no data for the amount of minerals and bacteria in the other sources of water, one cannot conclude that Clear-One bottled water is a good long term investment. It is possible that tap water has many more minerals than Clear-One bottled water and is better for one's health as compared to Clear-One bottled water. In such a scenario, Clear-One bottled water will not be a good long term investment as it has fewer minerals than tap water and it is more expensive than tap water. Had the argument included details of the mineral and bacteria content of other water sources, it would be more convincing.

Finally, the argument concludes that even though Clear-One bottled water is expensive, it is a good long term investment. However, to arrive at this conclusion, answers to several key questions must be provided. Is Clear-One bottled water better in quality when compared to other resources? Do residents of the town, where Clear-One bottled water is bottled, get sick less frequently than the national average because they consume Clear-One bottled water? Without answers to these questions, the argument is more of a wishful claim than substantive.

In conclusion, the argument is weak and unconvincing. It can be strengthened if it includes details of the mineral and bacteria content of other water sources and demonstrates that Clear-One bottled water is better than the other water sources. Without further details and answers to the questions stated above, this argument is open to debate.


Hi gag6kaur ,

I am no expert in making any analysis about your essay but please do go to the below link which consists of 109 sample essays to give you an AWA score of 6.0!!

I guess the above topics sample essay would also be available , if not you shall find a atleast few of them with respect to the similar topics. You can compare both of the essays and be your own judge!!

https://gmatclub.com/forum/awa-compilations-109-analysis-of-argument-essays-86274.html
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If you appreciate the post then please click +1Kudos :)

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Manager
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Re: awa evaluation [#permalink]

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New post 01 Dec 2017, 21:06
Thanks for the link. Really helpful.

Kudos [?]: 13 [0], given: 13

Re: awa evaluation   [#permalink] 01 Dec 2017, 21:06
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