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10 May 2015, 18:21
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99. The following appeared in an editorial from a newspaper serving the town of Saluda.
“The Saluda Consolidated High School offers over 200 different courses from which its students can choose. A much smaller private school down the street offers a basic curriculum of only 80 different courses, but it consistently sends a higher proportion of its graduating seniors on to college than Consolidated does. By eliminating at least half of the courses offered there and focusing on a basic curriculum, we could improve student performance at Consolidated and also save many tax dollars.”
Discuss how well reasoned . . . etc.
This argument concludes that The Saluda Consolidated High School should eliminate half of the courses offered to its students in order to improve their performance. This suggestion is based on the premise that a local private school that offers fewer courses sends a higher proportion of graduates to college, thus the same approach must be taken in order to ensure Consolidated High School students’ success. However, this conclusion is flawed because it relies on unsupported assumptions.
First, the argument wrongly assumes that the number of courses available at a high school is indirectly related to the performance of its students. In other words, it fails to consider the fact that the small private school sends a greater proportion of graduates to college not simply because it offers fewer courses, but because it provides other opportunities for students to learn and grow intellectually. This private school may, for instance, offer free counseling on college applications while Consolidated does not. In that case, it is expected that more of the seniors at the private school who had access to extra assistance gain admission to colleges. Another reason for the school’s superior performance could be that because it is smaller, each student benefits from extra personal attention and academic guidance compared to the students in a large public school. For such reasons, the assumption that the private school sends a greater proportion of its seniors to college solely because it offers fewer, more focused courses brings much doubt.
Furthermore, the given argument implies that student performance is measured by whether or not the student attends college. Though this assumption is somewhat plausible, it is not fully substantiated and thus still open to question. For example, one could easily argue that a student’s success is determined by many factors such as his scores on standardized tests that compare the scholastic aptitude of all high schoolers across the nation, or his performance as a college freshman which shows how well his high school had prepared him. Because the argument fails to mention whether the private school students performed better in all of these areas, it would not be safe to state that simply cutting down the variety of available courses would boost student performance at Consolidated.
If the argument had compared the two schools on more than one dimension, or provided data on student performance other than just the number of courses offered at each school, the conclusion may have been more plausible. However, the given conclusion relies on weak assumptions and therefore is ultimately flawed.
“The Saluda Consolidated High School offers over 200 different courses from which its students can choose. A much smaller private school down the street offers a basic curriculum of only 80 different courses, but it consistently sends a higher proportion of its graduating seniors on to college than Consolidated does. By eliminating at least half of the courses offered there and focusing on a basic curriculum, we could improve student performance at Consolidated and also save many tax dollars.”
Discuss how well reasoned . . . etc.
This argument concludes that The Saluda Consolidated High School should eliminate half of the courses offered to its students in order to improve their performance. This suggestion is based on the premise that a local private school that offers fewer courses sends a higher proportion of graduates to college, thus the same approach must be taken in order to ensure Consolidated High School students’ success. However, this conclusion is flawed because it relies on unsupported assumptions.
First, the argument wrongly assumes that the number of courses available at a high school is indirectly related to the performance of its students. In other words, it fails to consider the fact that the small private school sends a greater proportion of graduates to college not simply because it offers fewer courses, but because it provides other opportunities for students to learn and grow intellectually. This private school may, for instance, offer free counseling on college applications while Consolidated does not. In that case, it is expected that more of the seniors at the private school who had access to extra assistance gain admission to colleges. Another reason for the school’s superior performance could be that because it is smaller, each student benefits from extra personal attention and academic guidance compared to the students in a large public school. For such reasons, the assumption that the private school sends a greater proportion of its seniors to college solely because it offers fewer, more focused courses brings much doubt.
Furthermore, the given argument implies that student performance is measured by whether or not the student attends college. Though this assumption is somewhat plausible, it is not fully substantiated and thus still open to question. For example, one could easily argue that a student’s success is determined by many factors such as his scores on standardized tests that compare the scholastic aptitude of all high schoolers across the nation, or his performance as a college freshman which shows how well his high school had prepared him. Because the argument fails to mention whether the private school students performed better in all of these areas, it would not be safe to state that simply cutting down the variety of available courses would boost student performance at Consolidated.
If the argument had compared the two schools on more than one dimension, or provided data on student performance other than just the number of courses offered at each school, the conclusion may have been more plausible. However, the given conclusion relies on weak assumptions and therefore is ultimately flawed.
21 May 2015, 23:14
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Perhaps, it’s too late to rate the essay, when there's only one day to exam. But, the essay is not bad. You've followed the desired structure, given your opinion, and supported it. Still, it would be a good idea to study the patterns more carefully. There are a lot of resources, manuals and on-line services. Hope, you'll succeed!
22 May 2015, 14:48
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chat15
I scored a 5 out of 6 on the test, following the same structure. I'm retaking my test soon and I've been focusing more and Quant and Verbal over IR/Essay. Is a 5 good enough for top schools like Columbia, Wharton, and so on?
