Personal dilemma

Question

I brought up the possibility of having to move to the east coast for bschool to my gf and fiance to be. she is really opposed to the idea because of her sick mother (just had a stroke earlier this year but she's not the only one in her family who can help) and her job (she really has found a company where she feels good and the people are great. she has an opportunity to grow as well).

she's stating these two reasons why she does not want to transplant herself. i'm applying to schools in california but there is no guarantee where I will end up. as a career switcher, i've been told by many people that the full time program is the only realistic way. she's proposing that i get into a california school (i don't control the outcome of my applications) or go to a PT program.

trying to move from engineering into IB or corp dev seems like a very hard move coming from a PT mba. does anyone have any insight into this?

she's making it very hard on me... i'm not young (34) and i do not want to start from the bottom to work another 10 years to "maybe" get to where i want to be.

please... i'd appreciate some feedback.

Rubashov1 · Answer

I'm sorry about your quandary.

The only thing I can really add is this: I've read on this forum and "that other" forum that it is very tricky for someone who is 30+ years old to make a clean switch into investment banking. Not sure why, and it certainly isn't fair if true, but that's what I've heard.

I work in corp dev (pre-MBA)...I don't think a PT degree would make things too tough as long as you look in industries where your engineering experience could be helpful.

bb · Answer

You have a tough situation.
I think you are on the right track as you examine your options and set proper expectations. 
One challenge I see with you moving to the east coast is that you will create a lot of disruption, esp. if you take a Full Time program:

1. switching jobs for your wife
2. leaving her sick mother who she feels close to or a strong need to be nearby
3. no income for you if FT program - that will be a change
4. possible marriage/etc - change as well
5. moving and relocating, finding new place to live, getting used to the neighborhood, city, climate, etc

I am very far from being a relationship expert, but I think if you move to the east coast, you will lose your GF - it will be too much change for the two of you to adjust and save the relationship.

Since you are committed to her, what if you wait for your application results - see if you even get into the East coast schools to start with. If you are really set on east coast and it is a good school worth moving for, you may have to compromise and defer your enrollment by 1 year or 1 semester and move later on - showing your commitment to your GF. She will always appreciate it and you will feel better too.

As to career changes and FT/PT programs - PT is indeed harder for career changes. most of your classmates will have jobs with their current companies and will be working towards a set career plan, whereas you will be on a new path, looking for a new job. I think PT program is not designed to re-define you, rather to improve and build on your existing experience. You may ask the Career Change question to the admissions at the schools you are thinking about or possibly the PT students at those programs, if there are any events like that.

I think ideal option for you is to get into Stanford FT program (easier said than done).
Second best option is Stanford PT or wait a year and move to the East Coast FT program

vinviper · Answer

real tough one as it involves health of a loved one. go with your heart.

Personal dilemma

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