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Please rate my Essay. Many thanks in advance.

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Intern
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Joined: 01 Mar 2015
Posts: 1
Please rate my Essay. Many thanks in advance.  [#permalink]

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New post 01 Mar 2015, 06:31
Question: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
It is important for students to understand ideas and concepts than it is for them to learn facts.
My essay:
Learning has an incredibly important role in individuals' lives. One group thinks that learning ideas and concepts are important for students, while other groups believe that acquiring facts are more essential. From my point of view, learning facts is important and valuable for people who want to learn fundamentally because they can research efficiently and promote their power of thinking.
To begin with, students who want to be an outstanding researcher need to learn facts. Acquiring facts is substantial part of learning and all of the researchers should know the facts. In fact, a lack of knowledge about facts can leads students to analyze the problems wrongly. Successful academic individuals always want to answer their problem by linking them to the facts. In addition, learning facts provides a sense of satisfactory for students because they can understand their studies deeply. This sense can helps student to enjoy quality time and never consider that learning is boring while studying.
Second, understanding facts can leads students to increase their power of thinking. In fact, they learn how they should think about problems. They can also infer the problems easily because they know the fundamentals of science. In addition, Students who know facts can will be better able to distinguish between wrong and correct ideas. They can judge by thinking about problem and try to link them to the facts. This ability can helps student to publish their investigation in valid journals. For instance, they can think about the results of tests and try to discuss and link them to the facts.
All in all, the students should pay more attention to learn facts than learning ideas and concepts. By acquiring facts in schools, students can analyze the problems precisely and research efficiently. In addition, they will be better able to think about the problems because they learn fundamentals of science.
Intern
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Re: Please rate my Essay. Many thanks in advance.  [#permalink]

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New post 13 Aug 2015, 08:14
Hi there, I hope it is not too late to review your essay.

In my opinion:

1) The essay is well structured and fluent.
2) Both the grammar and the vocabulary are strong.
3) Right now, the explanation and examples are general. You should go a step further and add some personal experiences, it will help the rater to understand your point of view better. In addition to that, you will have a longer essay, as well.

Good luck with your studies!!

A.
GMAT Club Bot
Re: Please rate my Essay. Many thanks in advance.   [#permalink] 13 Aug 2015, 08:14
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Please rate my Essay. Many thanks in advance.

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