generis wrote:
Project SC Butler: Day 46 Sentence Correction (SC1)
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Unlike the successors of many Roman towns, which are generally discovered a short distance from the towns’ burial sites,
the town of Ebchester in the province of Lower Britain was built directly on top of the fort of Vindomora, thus not leaving much to be seen of the fort.
A) the town of Ebchester in the province of Lower Britain was built directly on top of the fort of Vindomora, thus not leaving much to be seen of
B) the fort of Vincomora in the province of Lower Britain can hardly be seen, as directly under the town of Ebchester is built
C) that which can be seen of the fort of Vindomora is scarce, as the town of Ebchester was built directly on top of
D) the province of Lower Britain has little remains seen of the fort of Vindomora in the town of Ebchester, built directly above
E) the fort of Vindomora in the province of Lower Britain has remained unfound, because the town of Ebchester was built directly on top of
• While it is tempting to compare things of the same kind (towns to towns) we must make sure that
not only the noun, but also the verb is properly compared.
• In this case, since the town [
of Ebchester] has been “’discovered,” and since we are looking for a comparison of contrast (
unlike),
it makes sense to compare [
the discovered town of Ebchester] to something that has remained unfound—the fort of Vindomora in answers (B) and (E).
• B is grammatically awkward;
is built the fort is inverted, and the entire final dependent clause is a stylistic and rhetorical mess. Unlike the successors of many Roman towns, which are generally discovered a short distance from the towns’ burial sites,
the fort of Vincomora in the province of Lower Britain can hardly be seen, as directly under the town of Ebchester is built the fort.
• The answer is E
COMMENTSThis question is instructive. I had a comparatively hard time with it until I shifted gears.
(1) METHOD: Find the meaning. Grammatical error analysis will not help much.
Trying to find grammatical errors in isolation will not work in this question.
All of the answers are arguably correct in a grammatical sense.
as
Mahmoudfawzy83 (welcome!) noted
I think it is more about the meaning rather than grammatical mistakes.
(2) METHOD: Compare similar answer to similar answer.
Such comparison often will make the better sentence clear,
and from that clarity we can examine the "better" parts.
(3) STRATEGY: In the same way that I urge people to stay laser-focused on the conclusion in CR,
this question demonstrates that we need to stay laser-focused on the logic of UNLIKE, and that
we need to look for logical clues (discussed below) that can help us choose an answer with contrast.
• Clarification about the phrase "comparison of contrast."
The phrase "a comparison of contrast" just means that we are looking for "contrast."
-- A rather heated debate exists about defining contrast as different from compare.
Many North American students (don't know about Europe) see essay questions in which the
prompt is "compare and contrast" the _____ .
-- the phrasing in this answer is used because the author is in the "contrast is a subset of compare" camp (as am I)
We can compare the similarities.
We can compare the differences. (Hence,
unlike.)
This page explains the issue,some posters point out that both Oxford and Collins dictionaries include "contrast" in the definition of "compare."
• StatsAt the moment, the stats on this question are:
67% chose A
4% chose B
0 chose C
4% chose D
25% chose E
• Approach?• Find cue words in the non-underlined part.I focused on two items,
unlike and
the fort• Unlike? Level 1 - the town of Ebchester is different from many other towns.
Other towns ["discovered"] were built near cemetaries.
Ebchester was built on top of a fort.
Okay, that's a difference, but we have two problems.
One, Ebchester is LIKE the other towns because it, too, has been discovered.
Two, why does this question include some buried fort? Is it visible or not?
Level 2 - Find the split: Is the fort visible, or not?
• Split: A, B, C, and D (fort is barely visible) vs. E (fort is not discovered)-- I think that the OE incorrectly suggests that (E)
and (B) show about the same level of contrast, that both correctly depict the fort as different from the discovered town of Ebchester. (See my analysis below.)
I see a different split, not 2-3 (EB-ACD), but rather 1-4 (E-ABCD)
A, B, C, and D all contain information that the fort is hard to see.
E says that the fort has not been discovered.
But I am troubled. I am not convinced that we should be comparing anything to the fort.
• Pick the best of A, B, C, and DOptions C and D are rhetorical disasters.
D)
has little remains seen of the fort of Vindomora-- not grammatical: "little remains" suggests that the remains themselves are small.
-- not grammatical: "seen" is the wrong adjective. "Visible" is what "seen" is supposed to convey,
but seen implies a witness. "Can be seen" would fix that issue.
-- not stylistically defensible
a town "has" (verb) "little remains seen" (object) is almost incomprehensible.
Compare to A and B. Both are better.
A) states: thus not leaving much
to be seen of the fort. That phrasing is correct.
B) the fort . . . can hardly be seen. That phrasing is correct.
At the least, A and B are better than D.
C is awful, too. . .. that which can be seen [of the fort] is
scarce . . .
-- wrong adjective. Scarce implies "not enough" [to meet some expectation or demand]
-- not always, but usually GMAC prefers the pronoun "what" to the phrase "that which"
-- C is not as good as A or B
Eliminate C and D.
• A, B, and E-- This part is hard. Stylistically, A and E are better than B.
-- But I still have my logical problem: which answer shows contrast best or stays most consistent with UNLIKE?
• LogicI shift gears. Back to basics. Check the first word of each of the remaining answers.
-- A) uses "the town." Options B and E use "the fort."
-- the town of Ebchester is different from other towns in the way that it was built,
but it has been discovered.
-- The prompt says, "Unlike X, which are generally
discovered-- That word is decisive. Ebchester is different AND similar to other towns.
IF the fort is not discovered, then UNLIKE is better satisfied because the fort is just different.
Eliminate A.
• B or E?-- B and E both begin with "fort."
-- But (B) mentions that the fort "can hardly be seen."
-- (E) says that the fort is unfound.
Unfound is the opposite of discovered. That contrast is stronger than the contrast words in (B).
Answer E it is
If you do agree with the author of the OE that B and E must be chosen from style, diction, and rhetorical angles,
the OE author is correct.
Rewrite of B:
. . . . sites, the fort of Vincomora in the province of Lower Britain can hardly be seen
because the town of Ebchester is built directly on top of the fort. [as in C and E]
I am very impressed by the people who posted.
There is no correct answer, although I think that some of the analysis
in each post is important. All of the posters demonstrate
exactly what I had to fight: getting caught up in noun comparison
is a distraction.
Today is the first day of SC Butler that I have not awarded kudos.
But I am happy: four very smart people just showed us
ways of approaching this kind of question that did NOT work.
Knowing what does not work is just as important as knowing what does.
Many thanks to Mudit27021988 ,
Darshi04 ,
Prateekj05 , and
Mudit27021988Holiday season has arrived where I live. Happy Holidays!
Incredible explanation through detailed and logical commentary. The question itself was so good that it warranted a healthy discussion.
Thank you for the inspiration, support and effort for such a detailed explanation!
close
22 Dec 2018, 10:25
63%
(01:45)
wrong 
