views on this issue

Question

AWA ESSAYS: Analyze Issues 
ESSAY QUESTION: 
“Parents should not shoulder the full burden of their children’s college tuition. If university students are required to pay for at least a portion of their education, they will take their studies more seriously and, ultimately, benefit more from their college experience.”

Discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the position stated above. Support your viewpoint using reasons and examples from your own experience, observations, or reading.

YOUR RESPONSE: 
issue- parents should not shoulder the full burden of their children's college tution.if a student is required to pay half the portion of fees. he will know his responsibilty of taking his studies seriously.

views- i completely agree with the given fact. my reasons to agree are, a university student is in the age group of 18 to 22. this age group is defintely not very young to not delegate the responsiblities to him or her.
when parents free their children from every burden of their life. children are ignorant of everything. they misuse their liberty. they dont value the source of income or money.
for them its an atm machine.swipe the card and money is in your hand.
but when students going to university are asked to pay half of their tution fee,they explores their own ways to earn it also value it that how difficult it is to earn . also this leads them to take studies seriously because they know its their money and difficulties they faced for earning it. sometimes even very optimistic thought leads them to aim for scholarships to wave off their tution fees to maximum limits.
for an instance, a child belonging to a rich and well to do family is never made aware of any problems or bad face of their life. he is given what he demands. for him fathers or any source of money is like an atm machine only. because he is never given that responsibilty .but the day he is asked to leave home and all facilities and earn himself. he realises how difficult is to earn. and he respects his own money by not spending on useless things which he had before.
in conclusion, i agree to the issue stated above and i myself believe in it.

heregoesnothing · Answer

You have some good points in favor of your arguments. However, It doesn't appear that this is a real response. I would suggest looking at some samples (this forum has some great ones) and preparing something that you would write in the real test.

Repost it in this thread and I'd be happy to review.

Keep practicing!

Repost it in this thread and I'd be happy to review.

Keep practicing!

nimisha59 · Answer

AWA ESSAYS: Analyze Issues 
ESSAY QUESTION: 
"Since key personal traits that make a good leader are formed during one’s childhood and youth, formal training can only refine rather than cultivate true leaders.”

Explain what you think this quotation means and discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with it. Develop your position with reasons and/or specific examples drawn from history, current events, or your own experience, observations, or reading.

YOUR RESPONSE: 
many people think that leadership can be gained by attending some leadership programs or some institute that can instill such quality in an individual.though i wont disagree completely with others,i will rather state and agree to the above given issue that personal traits that make a good leader are formed during one's childhood days and youth , formal training can only refine it.to prove my words i can hereby provide some examples.
this issue is controversial but on the closer examination it reveals that personal traits like good communication , leadership, management to some extent is based right from childhood.
nowadays so many mba colleges run and infact many of them run since 19th century, which provides education in management fields, leadership fields , communication fluency. 
from my personal experince in one such key traits that is communication , i can say so. i wasnt given that environment right from my childhood days where i can communicate in a standard way and today inspite of working so much on this key , i have not yet acheived the level i want.
people in america, britain have higher standard because they have been in that scenario right from the moment they stepped in this world. the reading habit inculcated in a child leads one to be more influencive and communicative in one's conversation than a person who never got a chance to do so in childhood days.
i am not saying its not possible. anythng is possible in this world, but it would have been much easier the other way
same goes with leadership. it is something if inculcated in a child from starting then later he just need some polishing and he shines out like a diamond. to prove we can see live examples of Mr. Narayan Murthy ,ceo of infosys. he has been an IIT passed out which is nothing but an engineering college. then he did several other courses none related to leadership or management as some IIM or ISB passed out who is best in management.still he is considered the king of business era who runs his business with all ettiquettes and qualties that is required.
his company is supposed to the most ethical runnning comany in india.
similarly mr vijay mallya who has never attended any formal mba college or learned such key traits by joining any course but today kingfisher his company is running most profitably all over the world

one can gain these qualities but to shine out like a diamond one needs a base from starting.
a child is the best learner . he can learn quite readily whatever he sees, whereever he lives.
and by massaging it more the true traits come out in a postive way.

the saying that a fountain ,to rise high ,needs a broader base is very true. if the base is broad one can work on it as much as one want.the childhood learning acts as a broader base providing higher interface to the better learning.

therefore not disagreeing completely with the fact that anything can be done or achieved , i will say it will be achieved in a better and easier way rather

heregoesnothing · Answer

Few things I can think of after reading the response

1. Be  very  clear in what you are trying to say. As I understand, you are trying to agree with the issue. Be clear. State that in short simple statements things you want convey. Imagine being a reader yourself, think about what would you prefer reading on a technical essay. Would you prefer an abstract prose? Or you'd prefer a simple statement that is to the point and conveys exactly what you are want to say? This also true for the points you are trying to make in the passages.

As an example, instead of

You can say something simple like  "I strongly believe that true leadership potential is developed during childhood and youth."

2. I usually don't pay a lot of attention the spellings, punctuations and formatting but there are a lot of them here. Also, I'm assuming you mean "influential" and not "influencive". My only advice is to be simple. If you are unsure of the word, don't use it. If I had to choose between using big words that I was unsure of over simple words that don't show off my vocabulary skills, I'd use the former any day. Practice writing formally, even if it means you write less. You don't want "i" in your essay.

3. Finally, to your arguments. My only concern is that you are mixing them. The point about an MBA in the first passage seems to be out of place, I think the second passage is probably a better place for it. An easy approach for a passage on the issues essays I learned is to 1) state your argument 2) followup with an example that supports your argument. That's it. Provide 2-3 such passages and you're golden.

In any case, this was a great effort. Hopefully my comments are helpful.

Keep practicing!!

nimisha59 · Answer

AWA ESSAYS: Analyze Issues 
ESSAY QUESTION: 
“The mission of a university is to educate its students. Therefore, a professor’s pay and promotions should be based primarily on students’ evaluations of his or her courses.”

Discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the opinion stated above. Support your views with reasons and/or examples from your own experience, observations, or reading.

YOUR RESPONSE: 
professor's pay and promotion should be based primarily on the students' evaluation of his or her courses since the main goal of an university is to educate its students.
many of others might disagree with the issue raised her. to a extent i agree with the the view mentioned here.

a student and a professor must have a direct interface relationship without a third party involvement. 
the university hiers standard level of professors paying them higher pay and providing them promotions but it may be possible that despite being a high level professor he is incapable to create a student- teacher interface . thus making it difficult for students to learn anything.

for instance, in my college, we had an economics professor and on the other hand a business management teacher. the only difference the two had was the level of interface drawn by them with students. we gave more of the credits to our economis professor since we were able to learn more from him compare to the other. the economice professor knew our requirement and thus deliverd the lectures as per our base of knowledge not just to finish up the course for the sake of exams.
because of the same reason the economics teacher had higher preferrence in the college in the eyes of every individual

secondly, to prove my point here, i want to convey that its a student who has to learn and its the professor who has to deliver knowledge, so why not to delegate the power of evaluating a professors reputation by students on some level not entirely. the sateity of gaining anythng lies with the students when they are satisfied with the professor definitely the professor is successful in creating that interface.
if the teacher is keen to make his students learn something new or different, a student cannot stop himself to listen and learn from that teacher.

in conclusion , i would state that a student must be given the opportunity to evaluate the pay and promotion of a profesor to the extent of how much that teacher is satifying a student's need in his course, so that a student can have higher chance of learning because then the professor has to work to satisfy his students not the dean who doesnt require to sit in his class.

heregoesnothing · Answer

There is a definite improvement over the last one. It is clear what you are trying to convey and your examples are relevant.

The main recommendation I have is same as the last one, try writing more formally. Especially since you have very few days left. It would be extremely difficult to write a formal essay on the day of the exam if you haven't practiced writing formally before. By formally I mean, proper capitalization, focusing more on spelling mistakes and punctuations.

Keep practicing!!!

views on this issue

Prep Toolkit

Top 5 GMAT Debrief Videos

615 to 715 in 15 Days (Ria's Strategies)

More than Quant/Verbal Abilities: Speed vs. Accuracy

745 with Only Self-Prep and GMAT Club

From 555 to 765: 210-point Improvement

Perfect 805 Score Debrief by Julia

My Rewards