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At one point, she believed GMAT wasn’t for her. After scoring 595, self-doubt crept in and she questioned her potential. But instead of quitting, she made the right strategic changes. The result? A remarkable comeback to 695. Check out how Saakshi did it.
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Apr 2808:00 AM PDT
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23 Jul 2023, 01:49
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In recent years, Braeburn Corporation has seen lagging sales of its food products. Just a few of the many food products Braeburn sells are soy products. Soy products have been shown to reduce rates of cancer. Because people care about reducing their risk of cancer, Braeburn should increase manufacturing of soy products. This will help Braeburn Corporation improve sales and increase profits.
The argument claims that Braeburn Corporation has seen lagging sales of its food products. Stated this way the argument fails to mention several key factors on the basis of which it could be evaluated, and reveals examples of leap of faith and poor reasoning. The conclusion of the argument relies on assumptions for which there is no clear evidence. Hence, the argument is unconvincing and has several flaws.
First, the argument readily assumes that a few of the many food products Braeburn sells are soy products. This statement is a stretch and not substantiated in any way. For example,Soy products have been shown to reduce rates of cancer. The argument could be much clearer if it explicitly stated that people care about reducing their risk of cancer, Braeburn should increase manufacturing of soy products. This will help Braeburn Corporation improve sales and increase profits.
Second, the argument claims that people care about reducing their risk of cancer, Braeburn should increase manufacturing of soy products. This is again a very weak and unsupported claim as the argument does not demonstrate any correlation between Soy products have been shown to reduce rates of cancer and people care about reducing their risk of cancer. To illustrate Soy products have been shown to reduce rates of cancer . While people care about reducing their risk of cancer, Braeburn should increase manufacturing of soy products. If the argument had provided evidence that Braeburn Corporation improve sales and increase profits, then the argument would have been a lot more convincing.
Finally This will help Braeburn Corporation improve sales and increase profits. will help Braeburn Corporation improve sales and increase profits.
Without convincing answers to these questions, one is left with the impression that the claim is more to a wishful thinking rather than substantive evidence.
In conclusion, the argument is flawed for the above-mentioned reasons and is therefore unconvincing. It could be considerably strengthened if the author clearly mentioned all the relevant facts. In order to access the merits of a certain situation, it is essential to have full knowledge of all contributing factors.
The argument claims that Braeburn Corporation has seen lagging sales of its food products. Stated this way the argument fails to mention several key factors on the basis of which it could be evaluated, and reveals examples of leap of faith and poor reasoning. The conclusion of the argument relies on assumptions for which there is no clear evidence. Hence, the argument is unconvincing and has several flaws.
First, the argument readily assumes that a few of the many food products Braeburn sells are soy products. This statement is a stretch and not substantiated in any way. For example,Soy products have been shown to reduce rates of cancer. The argument could be much clearer if it explicitly stated that people care about reducing their risk of cancer, Braeburn should increase manufacturing of soy products. This will help Braeburn Corporation improve sales and increase profits.
Second, the argument claims that people care about reducing their risk of cancer, Braeburn should increase manufacturing of soy products. This is again a very weak and unsupported claim as the argument does not demonstrate any correlation between Soy products have been shown to reduce rates of cancer and people care about reducing their risk of cancer. To illustrate Soy products have been shown to reduce rates of cancer . While people care about reducing their risk of cancer, Braeburn should increase manufacturing of soy products. If the argument had provided evidence that Braeburn Corporation improve sales and increase profits, then the argument would have been a lot more convincing.
Finally This will help Braeburn Corporation improve sales and increase profits. will help Braeburn Corporation improve sales and increase profits.
Without convincing answers to these questions, one is left with the impression that the claim is more to a wishful thinking rather than substantive evidence.
In conclusion, the argument is flawed for the above-mentioned reasons and is therefore unconvincing. It could be considerably strengthened if the author clearly mentioned all the relevant facts. In order to access the merits of a certain situation, it is essential to have full knowledge of all contributing factors.
23 Jul 2023, 11:08
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AWA Score: 4.5 out of 6
Coherence and Connectivity: 4.5
The essay demonstrates a moderate level of coherence and connectivity. The author presents a logical flow of ideas and attempts to connect them with transitional phrases such as "First," "Second," and "Finally." However, there are instances where the connections between ideas could be clearer and more explicit to improve overall coherence.
Word Structure: 5.0
The essay shows a good command of word structure. The sentences are generally well-structured and easy to follow. There are minimal issues with word choice and sentence construction, contributing to the clarity of the essay.
Paragraph Structure and Formation: 4.5
The essay consists of three main paragraphs, which address different aspects of the argument. The paragraph structure is generally well-formed, with each paragraph focusing on a specific point and supporting it with relevant reasoning. However, the second paragraph appears to repeat some information from the first paragraph, which could be better organized to avoid redundancy.
Language and Grammar: 5.5
The language and grammar usage are mostly strong. The essay effectively conveys the author's ideas, and the sentences are grammatically correct for the most part. There are a few minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasings, but they do not significantly impede understanding.
Vocabulary and Word Expression: 4.0
The vocabulary used in the essay is adequate, but it lacks sophistication and variety. The author relies on some repetitive phrases and does not explore more diverse language options to enhance expression. By incorporating a wider range of vocabulary, the essay could have been more engaging and compelling.
Overall, the essay exhibits an acceptable level of analytical writing but could benefit from improvements in coherence, vocabulary, and paragraph structure. With revisions to strengthen these aspects, the essay could become more convincing and impactful. The essay scores a total of 4.5 out of 6.0.
Coherence and Connectivity: 4.5
The essay demonstrates a moderate level of coherence and connectivity. The author presents a logical flow of ideas and attempts to connect them with transitional phrases such as "First," "Second," and "Finally." However, there are instances where the connections between ideas could be clearer and more explicit to improve overall coherence.
Word Structure: 5.0
The essay shows a good command of word structure. The sentences are generally well-structured and easy to follow. There are minimal issues with word choice and sentence construction, contributing to the clarity of the essay.
Paragraph Structure and Formation: 4.5
The essay consists of three main paragraphs, which address different aspects of the argument. The paragraph structure is generally well-formed, with each paragraph focusing on a specific point and supporting it with relevant reasoning. However, the second paragraph appears to repeat some information from the first paragraph, which could be better organized to avoid redundancy.
Language and Grammar: 5.5
The language and grammar usage are mostly strong. The essay effectively conveys the author's ideas, and the sentences are grammatically correct for the most part. There are a few minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasings, but they do not significantly impede understanding.
Vocabulary and Word Expression: 4.0
The vocabulary used in the essay is adequate, but it lacks sophistication and variety. The author relies on some repetitive phrases and does not explore more diverse language options to enhance expression. By incorporating a wider range of vocabulary, the essay could have been more engaging and compelling.
Overall, the essay exhibits an acceptable level of analytical writing but could benefit from improvements in coherence, vocabulary, and paragraph structure. With revisions to strengthen these aspects, the essay could become more convincing and impactful. The essay scores a total of 4.5 out of 6.0.
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