Hi Guys,
I am new to this club and I have just started my preparations for GMAT.
I wrote my first AWA after learning about the strategies etc.
Please rate my essay if possible, help will be much appreciated.
QUESTION
“Over time, the costs of processing go down because as organizations learn how to do things better, they become more efficient. In color film processing, for example, the cost of a 3-by-5-inch print fell from 50 cents for five-day service in 1970 to 20 cents for one-day service in 1984. The same principle applies to the processing of food. And since Olympic Foods will soon celebrate its 25th birthday, we can expect that our long experience will enable us to minimize costs and thus maximize profits.”
ESSAY
The author said that with time the efficiency of an organization increases as they gain more experience and learn how to do things properly. Author also gives an example to prove his point and he expects that the Olympic foods will also minimize cost and increase their profits as their 25th birthday is nearing.
First, the author cites an example of a film processing industry whose 3/5 inch printing cost fell in 14 years. Here author fails to explain how similar thing can happen to a food processing industry , both kind of industries are different on their own . It might have been possible that the falling of price for film industry was a result of stiff competition or low prices of raw material required or cheap labor etc. , this might not be the case with food processing industry. If author had given some solid relation between both kinds of companies or would have given a reason for price drop then only he would have sounded more convincing.
Second, the author said that with time the prices go down, this might not actually be true if we consider the value of rupee or dollar that would go down or up in 15-20 years, the products might get costlier or cheaper on their own if the value of currency fluctuates and it is well known that in a span of 20 years value of currency does change. And after 20 years of starting a company, the company generally lays its hands in different sectors across market, so this might also be the case for price drop in one product and the increase in the profits of the company. Here, if the example given by the author was supported with the facts about currency value, products of company etc. then the author would have sounded more convincing.
Therefore, if the author provided the details about the film industry and Olympic foods then only the statement would have been well reasoned, without any such detail and other details mentioned in earlier paragraphs it is a bit idiotic to get convinced with the author’s point of view.