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07 Feb 2023, 09:51
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Score my writing with suggestions.
Competition for high grades seriously limits the quality of learning at all levels of education.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
While competition seems to enhance one’s overall aptitude, the overly qualified to grades might be uncertain to produce quality learning capacity. Contends at different levels of education should be fair and progressive: the prejudiced focus on grades rather than on intellectuals might not provide a transparent path to further individual development. I strongly disagree with the statement about the competition being surrounded on getting marks, in fact, not on prospering the learning quality.
Higher grades though seem nice on certificate and mark sheet only acquiring of higher marks doesn’t guarantee learning ability—higher marks on documents and poor co-ordination capacity. For stance, students can score higher marks by covering the syllabus focused on the exam based or important in the context of the exam while leaving other topics behind. Covering the syllabus and scoring higher marks doesn’t clearly justify that the student has the overall knowledge about the subject matter to its nadir. For instance, if a student of agriculture, if only reads about the fruits, vegetables and grains, but have not interacted with any of them will not able to know the real problems of field and the quality of is/her leaning about the circumstances of the field will be unknown. It might also be true that the student might scores good grades by memorizing the answers and probable questions. The above example illustrates that students scores higher marks do not guarantee in the capacity to leaning and get acquainted with quality knowledge.
In addition to, students or competitors might also score good grades in an immoral way—cheating on the exams. All students might not be motivated via same moral conduct, some participants might misconduct and defy the morality of the competition to shift the results towards his/her benefits. The cheating and dependent on cheat or other misconduct will definitely decline the students discipline, power to learn new things which further encourage to remain on the same path—scores are easily scored.
Furthermore, the concept of students on earlier age has been inured to score higher marks no matter the path to get it. As the students with higher marks get praised on and low scorer are ignored, : to the statement competitors are also get majorly concerned on obtain higher marks, however, this sense of understanding will pave the path of humdrum. In stark contrast to the career skills development, leaning of innovative knowledge, developing the ability to analyze and other renovation of the capacity, the environment has mainly concerned on getting marks. For stance, a student who does not know how to operate excel-sheet and MS- word but has scored full marks on the subject of computer programs is futile. From above illustrations it was transparent that copying the books getting higher marks or memorizing the books only will not help in leaning new knowledge.
In fact, some might argue that scoring higher grades helps in involving the interested area of education, for instance, to get admit in higher ranked university, you should have higher CGPA and scores really matters at that point. Also, all higher scorers are, if any, not always, are unaware of the subject matter that they have studied.
At last, competition definitely helps to be better but on the race to get higher rank one should not shift from their moral ground: the misconducted ranks and scores without actual learning will not set the sweet fruits. The creativity and skill development are the cardinal important in this competitive world instead of accumulating marks however, occasionally having higher marks have benefits and not always acts as malign.
Competition for high grades seriously limits the quality of learning at all levels of education.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
While competition seems to enhance one’s overall aptitude, the overly qualified to grades might be uncertain to produce quality learning capacity. Contends at different levels of education should be fair and progressive: the prejudiced focus on grades rather than on intellectuals might not provide a transparent path to further individual development. I strongly disagree with the statement about the competition being surrounded on getting marks, in fact, not on prospering the learning quality.
Higher grades though seem nice on certificate and mark sheet only acquiring of higher marks doesn’t guarantee learning ability—higher marks on documents and poor co-ordination capacity. For stance, students can score higher marks by covering the syllabus focused on the exam based or important in the context of the exam while leaving other topics behind. Covering the syllabus and scoring higher marks doesn’t clearly justify that the student has the overall knowledge about the subject matter to its nadir. For instance, if a student of agriculture, if only reads about the fruits, vegetables and grains, but have not interacted with any of them will not able to know the real problems of field and the quality of is/her leaning about the circumstances of the field will be unknown. It might also be true that the student might scores good grades by memorizing the answers and probable questions. The above example illustrates that students scores higher marks do not guarantee in the capacity to leaning and get acquainted with quality knowledge.
In addition to, students or competitors might also score good grades in an immoral way—cheating on the exams. All students might not be motivated via same moral conduct, some participants might misconduct and defy the morality of the competition to shift the results towards his/her benefits. The cheating and dependent on cheat or other misconduct will definitely decline the students discipline, power to learn new things which further encourage to remain on the same path—scores are easily scored.
Furthermore, the concept of students on earlier age has been inured to score higher marks no matter the path to get it. As the students with higher marks get praised on and low scorer are ignored, : to the statement competitors are also get majorly concerned on obtain higher marks, however, this sense of understanding will pave the path of humdrum. In stark contrast to the career skills development, leaning of innovative knowledge, developing the ability to analyze and other renovation of the capacity, the environment has mainly concerned on getting marks. For stance, a student who does not know how to operate excel-sheet and MS- word but has scored full marks on the subject of computer programs is futile. From above illustrations it was transparent that copying the books getting higher marks or memorizing the books only will not help in leaning new knowledge.
In fact, some might argue that scoring higher grades helps in involving the interested area of education, for instance, to get admit in higher ranked university, you should have higher CGPA and scores really matters at that point. Also, all higher scorers are, if any, not always, are unaware of the subject matter that they have studied.
At last, competition definitely helps to be better but on the race to get higher rank one should not shift from their moral ground: the misconducted ranks and scores without actual learning will not set the sweet fruits. The creativity and skill development are the cardinal important in this competitive world instead of accumulating marks however, occasionally having higher marks have benefits and not always acts as malign.
07 Feb 2023, 10:25
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Is this a GMAT Essay?
Good Luck
AWA Score: 4 out of 6
Coherence and connectivity: 3/5
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.
Paragraph structure and formation: 2/5
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.
Vocabulary and word expression: 4.5/5
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!
Coherence and connectivity: 3/5
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.
Paragraph structure and formation: 2/5
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.
Vocabulary and word expression: 4.5/5
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!
Good Luck
NamaRajBhusal
08 Feb 2023, 08:29
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Thank you for your precious suggestions. I will try my best to incorporate all the feedback.
