Hi
Sajjad1994 ..
Requesting for evaluation of my essay, based on the undermentioned AWA prompt :-
QUESTION"People who wear eyeglasses often need stronger prescriptions over time. For example, a woman in her 40's began wearing glasses on the advice of an optometrist and, in just one year, required stronger lenses. Furthermore, eyeglass and contact lens users report more eye-related problems than do those who wear neither. Given that a typical eyeglass wearer buys expensive new glasses every two to three years, people considering corrective lenses should instead invest in an eye-strengthening program, which could save them thousands of dollars over their lifetimes."
Discuss how well-reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion, be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counterexamples might weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion.ESSAYThe argument under reference, possibly an extract of wellness or health magazine, highlights the requirement of emphasis on eye strengthening programs over the the traditional method of eye care ie, wearing of eye glasses or contact lenses. The author bases his argument on weak evidence of a woman in her 40s who felt the need for stronger eyeglasses within a year of starting to wear eyeglasses on the advice of an optometrist. Simultaneously, the author develops his argument with a doubtful assumption that wearing eyeglasses leads to weakening of eye over time. The argument may seem convincing in the initial glance; however, on a deeper analysis, the argument reveals critical flaws affecting the logical soundness of the argument prescribing eye strengthening programs.
Firstly, the argument fails to provide supporting evidence in the form of a survey among the masses. The argument highlights only one example of a woman in her 40s as its supporting evidence, which in turn is grossly inadequate to develop the argument. A detailed survey , duly highlighting the results or benefits accrued to the eye patients due to wearing of eyeglasses or otherwise will be adequate.
Secondly, the author fails to consider the environmental factors affecting the particular region to which the author belongs to. The local weather conditions may affect the eye considerably, and so wearing eyeglasses may not prove effective. This may not hold true to a similar extent for other regions. Hence, an all-round claim over the weaker efficacy of eye glasses, as hinted by the author, may not be appropriate.
Thirdly, the author seeks to replace the expenses incurred on the eye-glasses by expenses on eye strengthening programs. However, without citing adequate proof in terms of benefits, efficacy results etc, the author's argument seems logically unconvincing. The author should support his favor for eye strengthening programs through a comparison survey or experimental results to prove that adoption of eye strengthening programs will prove more beneficial in the long run.
Towards improving the logical soundness of the argument, the author needs to present stronger evidence in the form of scientific proof, commentaries by actual beneficiaries of eye strengthening programs and mass surveys pertaining to worsening conditions attributable to wearing of eyeglasses. .
In essence, the argument suffers from glaring inadequacies pertaining to weak evidence and absence of examples or counterexamples for highlighting the limitations associated with wearing of eyeglasses. Supporting the argument with surveys will improve the logical soundness of the argument considerably. Simultaneously, the author needs to furnish adequate widely available medical proof while developing the argument to lend credence to his views recommending eye strengthening programs over wearing of eyeglasses.