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# Please review my essay and provide feedback : AWA

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Intern
Joined: 15 Feb 2017
Posts: 3

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07 Mar 2018, 14:11
The following appeared in the opinion section of a national newsmagazine:
“To reverse the deterioration of the postal service, the government should raise the price of postage stamps. This solution will no doubt prove effective, since the price increase will generate larger revenues and will also reduce the volume of mail, thereby eliminating the strain on the existing system and contributing to improved morale.”

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The argument describes a proposed solution to the deterioration of the postal service and the reason why this solution is a good one. The solution proposed suggests that the raise in the price of postage stamps will increase the revenues and will reduce the total volume of mail, eliminating the strain on the existing system and contributing to improved morale. As it is the argument is superficial and presents different flaws that can be easily addressed.

First, the proposal focuses only on stamp price; this is a limited view and could not affect at all the revenues. In fact, could be that the most used postal service is not the postcard stamp but another kind of service, so the raise on stamps' price will have a little or no effect at all because if the number people that use stamps remains constant the revenues will be negligible compared to the total revenues coming from other services. A better solution could be the raise of price of the most used postal service that the company has.

Second, the argument focuses only on the raise of a service to reverse the deterioration of the postal service, but to do that there is also another way. Generally, to reverse a deterioration of a company the profit should grow in order to cover internal problems; to do so there are two ways: reduce costs or increase revenues. The argument describes only the "increase revenues solution" but reducing costs is another possibility that will not affect the costumers but will increase profits. An example could be the reduction of stamps costs, or a reduction in costs in another division, such as marketing or IT, that will impact the general profits of the company positively.

As seen, different approaches could be perceived but to address the problem in the best way, the company should analyze the company as a whole and provide some statistics about the costs and revenues in all the divisions, in order to have the base on which rely in the actions needed to reverse the deterioration.

In conclusion, the argument is superficial and presents different flaws that could be solved with a more detailed and broaden analysis of the company.
Senior Manager
Joined: 29 Jun 2017
Posts: 399

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22 Mar 2018, 08:34
To reverse the deterioration of the postal service, the government should raise the price of postage stamps. This solution will no doubt prove effective, since the price increase will generate larger revenues and will also reduce the volume of mail, thereby eliminating the strain on the existing system and contributing to improved morale.”

i will spend 7 or 8 minutes to find the conclusion and brainstorm two assumption

conclusion: the rise in price will prove service.

assumption 1. revenue will rise. maybe revenue is not rise because volume reduction can not compensate for price rise
assumption 2. reduction in volume will eliminate the strain. it is possible that strain is caused by bad management.
Re: Please review my essay and provide feedback : AWA &nbs [#permalink] 22 Mar 2018, 08:34
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