AWA Score: 5 out of 6
Coherence and connectivity: 3.5/5
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.
Paragraph structure and formation: 4.5/5
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.
Vocabulary and word expression: 4/5
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!
Good Luckamilstein
Question:
The following appeared as part of the business plan of an investment and financial consulting firm:
“Studies suggest that an average coffee drinker’s consumption of coffee increases with age, from age 10 through age 60. Even after age 60, coffee consumption remains high. The average cola drinker’s consumption of cola, however, declines with increasing age. Both of these trends have remained stable for the past 40 years. Given that the number of older adults will significantly increase as the population ages over the next 20 years, it follows that the demand for coffee will increase and the demand for cola will decrease during this period. We should, therefore, consider transferring our investments from Cola Loca to Early Bird Coffee.”
Answer:
The firm argues that the best cause of action for their client is to change their investments from Cola Loca to Early Bird Coffee since, as the population ages, the demand for coffee will increase while the demand for cola will decrease. This argument fails to take into account a few points that make the argument flawed such as, the actual rates of increase and decrease in demand, the total demand for each product, as well as the increase of younger people compared to older adults.
First, the firm fails to mention the actual rates involved in its calculation. This makes their results ambiguous since the changes in the rate increase for coffee demand and rate decrease for cola demand may be negligible or very small. This would indicate that the overall change in demand might not be enough to warrant a transfer in the client's investments. This comes hand in hand with the next flaw in the firm's argument.
The next point that the firm fails to account for is the total number of each type of drinker. It may as well be the case that there is a very small number of coffee drinkers when compared to the number of cola drinkers and that the change in rate of consumption might not be enough to actually make the change in investment strategy viable. This means that without these numbers it is risky to make assertions as strong as the firm does.
Lastly, the firm only mentions that the population of older adults will increase in the next 20 years but makes no comparison to the younger population. It is possible that, while the older population may increase, the younger population could increase just as or even more quickly than their older counterparts. This may actually indicate a conflict in the firm's recommendation. If the younger population will increase at a higher rate than the older population, it is reasonable to assume that the consumption of cola will actually increase more than that of coffee even if it decreases as a person ages.
In conclusion, failing to mention total number of consumers for each product, the specific rate at which consumption changes over time, and the actual population changes for each age group projected, fails to give a full picture of what the actual landscape will look like in the next 20 years and for consumers of the products mentioned. Therefore, the argument is flawed.