AWA Score: 5.5 out of 6
Coherence and connectivity: 5/5
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.
Paragraph structure and formation: 4.5/5
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.
Vocabulary and word expression: 4/5
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!
Good LuckRiteshchauhan wrote:
Prompt: “The autonomy of any country is based on the strength of its borders; if the number of illegal immigrants entering a country cannot be checked, both its economy and national identity are endangered. Because illegal immigrants pose such threats, every effort must be made to return them to their country of origin.”
The argument claims that the autonomy of a country is based on the strength of its borders and that if illegal immigrants entering a country cannot be checked, both its economy and national identity are endangered, Hence, every effort must be made to return the illegal immigrants to their county of origin. Stated this way the argument fails to mention several key factors, on basis of which it could be evaluated. The conclusion relies on assumptions, for which there is no clear evidence. Therefore, the argument is rather weak, unconvincing, and has several flaws.
Firstly, the argument readily assumes that incoming immigrants always poses threat to the country’s economy and identity. This statement is a stretch and is not substantiated in any way. For several countries, a large portion of their workforce comprises immigrant workers and hence most of the services available in such counties are governed, monitored, and maintained by such workers. In addition, the culture and identity of several countries are based on the culture and identity that immigrants bought with them. This argument must have been clearer if it explicitly gave examples of how illegal immigrants leads to a fall of country’s economy and identity.
Second, the argument claims that autonomy of a county is based on strength of its borders. This is again a very weak and unsupported claim as the argument does not demonstrate any correlation between the border strength and autonomy of the county, rather, the argument claims that autonomy of a country is entirely based on the strength of its borders and does not even consider other factors. To illustrate, there are a lot of European countries that exert very less strength on their borders and yet are highly autonomous. If the argument had provided evidence that autonomy is governed solely by the border strength, the argument could have been strengthened further.
Finally, the argument concludes that every effort must be made to return illegal immigrants to their county of origin. From this statement again, it is not at all clear how this extreme measure could help the economy and the identity of a county. It does not take into account the fact that a large share of the workforce in most countries comprises of immigrant workers and the economy will be in grave danger if any such step is taken, In addition, it does not take into consideration the cost of such an operation. Without more supporting evidence, one is left with the impression that the claim is more of a wishful thinking rather than a substantive evidence. As a result, this conclusion has no legs to stand on.
In summary, the argument is flawed and therefore is unconvincing. It could be considerably strengthened if the author clearly mentioned all the relevant facts. In order to access the merits of a certain situation, it is essential to have full knowledge of all contributing factors.