The falling revenues that the company is experiencing
[#permalink]
12 Feb 2016, 09:38
Experts please help me improve my AWA response.
Argument:
“The falling revenues that the company is experiencing coincide with delays in manufacturing. These delays,
in turn, are due in large part to poor planning in purchasing metals. Consider further that the manager of the
department that handles purchasing of raw materials has an excellent background in general business,
psychology, and sociology, but knows little about the properties of metals. The company should, therefore, move
the purchasing manager to the sales department and bring in a scientist from the research division to
be manager of the purchasing department.”
My response:
The argument that current purchasing manager be moved to the sales department and a scientist from the research division to be manager of the purchasing department omits some important concerns that must be addressed to substantiate the argument.The statement that precedes the description of how poor planning in purchasing metals caused delays and this delay coincidence with falling revenue that the company is facing. Further the manager of the raw materials department has an excellent background in general business, psychology and sociology, but knows little about metals and his lack in knowledge of metal has led to poor planning in purchasing metals. This alone does not constitute a logical argument in favor of the falling revenues that the company is experiencing and it certainly does not provide support or proof of the main argument.
Most conspicuously, the argument doesn’t address the cause of the falling revenues, are there any other factors that led to poor planning in purchasing metals and does the scientist has any prior experience in metal purchasing domain.Firstly, falling revenues that the company is facing cannot be attributed to delay in manufacturing just because delay in manufacturing coincides with falling revenues. Revenues of the company can fall because of multiple reasons, for example rising cost of raw material, increase labor cost, decline in product sales, etc. Secondly, poor planning in purchasing is poorly linked to delays in manufacturing. Poor planning in metal purchase can be caused by lack of funds for purchase or sudden rise in metal costs and delays is manufacturing can be cause by lack of labor force or frequent failure of manufacturing machines. Knowledge if business is equally important in making purchasing decisions and Knowledge manger having an excellent background in general business, psychology, and sociology cannot be ignored.Finally, scientist who has just expertise in metal properties cannot be purchasing manager, because he must have knowledge of business and prior experience in purchasing department.
Because the argument leaves out several key issues, it is not sound or persuasive. If it included the items discussed above instead of solely explaining causes delay in manufacturing, the argument would have been more thorough and convincing.
Thanks & regards,
Sunil01