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Bdevil25
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It's all in your approach.

If you say you want him to talk about some specfic projects, he thinks you think he doesn't know about your accomplishments... which could be taken as an insult by some people.

It's better to say that you're attacking the school at a certain angle and you want your recommendation letters to complement and back-up that angle because the recommendaiton questions are so open-ended that your recommender could end up talking about something totally unrelated to the thing your emphasizing in your essays.

No need to give him copies of your essays. Just give him 1-2 sentence summary of the responses to your essays and let him run with it.