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Yudanashi
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FROM Yudanashi: Finding Peace Amid Chaos
Tokyo is insane. Space is a luxury and so is time to breathe.

After recovering from hiking Mt. Fuji by taking a long nap I walked through the city taking it all in. My senses were overloaded as just about everywhere I went resembled a Times Square display of lights, sounds, smells, and experience.

Around dinner-time I stopped into a fantastic respite from the city to grab a bite to eat in a Tempura bar. Here the chefs had a mastery and dedication to their craft that was astounding. They would take tiger prawns from the tank, kill them, shell them, and then batter and fry them up with a precision that fascinated me. Sitting at the bar I had a front-row seat to the entire spectacle and it was interesting to see the ritualistic approach to their job that they took.

These chefs treated their work like a karate master treats his practice or a flower arranger treats their arrangements. With focused practice that recognizes the fact that too much is just as bad as too little and thus perfection in every action is required. It would not surprise me if tempura had a school or Ryu in Japan with traditions passed down from master to student that formalized the methods behind each action. Its the same mentality that has driven Ichiro to 3,000 hits in the MLB and it is amazing to watch in person.

Some things like this are unique and representative of the spirit of the Japanese people. Some things are universal no matter what language you speak and where you are. After dinner I wanted to test this, so I went to a gay bar.

Gay bars are universal. I’ve now been in one in 8 countries and even in Japan they have the same types of people, the same focus, and the same easy-going nature that lets you introduce yourself to someone, hear their story, and start to make friendships. It also always has that sage old queen ready to dish out life advice whether you ask for it or not. Last night his name was Phil and after chatting for a bit I learned that he had grown up in Australia and now managed a tour company here in Tokyo. He told me what to go see in Tokyo and what to avoid and as universal truths go he led myself and a gaggle of gays down the road to a drag karaoke night which felt like I was back in DC with the Gay Men’s Chorus of Washington.

I have barely stopped moving since landing in Tokyo because it is such a busy city and I have so little time to experience it. But I’m finding that in its own unique way, you can find the time to breathe and escape the city just by stepping through a door. I don’t think this is unique to Japan but something that I can find in my daily life wherever my life take me.


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FROM Yudanashi: Onsen
The worst part about climbing Mt. Fuji doesn’t hit you until a day or two later. I hadn’t planned for this and it cost me half a day of my time in Japan and my day-trip to Kyoto. I had forgotten that after hiking up a 4km mountain for 8 hours and 2 hours back down at pretty quick pace would be a workout. And like all workouts the muscle soreness hits you 1-2 days later. Lets just say I couldn’t get out of bed because my thighs and calves were that tight and sore.

Thankfully another Japanese tradition came to my rescue. After hoisting myself out of bed and getting some ramen to nourish my body I visited the local Onsen. It turned out to be just around the block from my Airbnb and one of the most highly rated in Tokyo. For those who don’t know, an Onsen is a Japanese public bath house that is filled with natural hot springs.

Harking back to an era when most Japanese didn’t have baths in their house, an onsen was a communal facility for cleaning and bonding. At first it was a little weird for my western upbringing but pretty quickly I let the hot springs do their magic and I relaxed, opened up my mind, and embraced the concept. You see, an Onsen is separated male & female and done completely in the nude.

You start your onsen with a pre-rinse and then a shower where you clean up and get the grime of Tokyo off of your skin. You then can alternate between one of many baths including a Jet bath, a sea salt bath, a carbonated bath, a cold bath (freezing cold!) and a lie-down bath. There is also a sauna and steam room.

Now alternating between each of these baths, in the nude, can be a bit strange at first but you quickly realize that the experience is about letting your guards down and relaxing in a safe environment not often afforded in traditional Japanese culture. When you and your family were at constant war with other tribes and clans in feudal Japan there was a need for constant vigilance and alertness. For the samurai class, the onsen was one of the few places that they could relax and thus bond with their companions whom they trusted ont he battlefield.

Those same mentalities and attitudes continue today and it was an experience I was glad to have not only for the uniqueness of the tradition, but also because my muscles needed a break. I’m still sore today and am worried about being stuck at 35,000 ft’ for 12 hours this evening where I might have to get up and stretch frequently. However, I know that if I hadn’t have been able to spend 2 hours at the onsen I wouldn’t have been able to enjoy the rest of Japan.


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FROM Yudanashi: Graditude for Time
Time is a weird concept. It can stretch for seemingly forever (like when you are watching the “Time to destination” clock mid-flight) and it can compress and seem like a month goes by in an instant. This week has definitely pushed my sense of time.

7 days ago I was working in London helping to devise the digital strategy for a financial services client. Since then I have been in 6 different countries (2 for layovers) Knowing that I had a flight to Barcelona I was literally counting down and messaged the group “2 hours until I leave work, 2 hours till I leave work 1hr 59 min until I leave work” as a joke about how ready I was to join my friends in Spain.

Once I landed, time took on a Spanish air where the pace of the country slowed down a bit and dinner stretched for hours but seemed like minutes as the company was amazing. Laying out at the beach meant time didn’t matter as long as the sun was up. Then on Monday morning I took off for Japan via Rome and lost an entire day of my life to travel. I left Spain at 11:30 am on Monday and landed in Japan at 11:00am Tuesday. I slept a little bit on the plane but not much. Time passed by so slowly that day.

After landing in Japan I hiked Fuji and the first hour seemed to last for 4 and the last 4 hours flew by as I’d gotten used to the climb. I seized back that lost time by delaying sleep and ended up paying for it later. I spent the next few days in Japan at breakneck pace trying to fit everything in and experiencing the fact that I couldn’t even if I lived in Tokyo full-time.

Then comes Friday – 7 days later and at 4:30pm I took off from Japan only to land first in Minneapolis in the past, at 1:30pm and then onto Montreal landing at 7pm still on Friday. I get to spend the next few days giving one of my best friends a fabulous bachelor party surrounded by his friends and the French boys of Quebec.

As I sat on my flight from Tokyo to Minneapolis I was chatting with the flight attendant as I stretched my legs and she asked about my travels so I told her about the crazy 7 days I’ve had and the 3 more that are left. In that conversation I realized how incredibly blessed I am to be able to 1. have the time and money to do such a crazy trip and 2. have the courage to pull off my vist visit to Asia sandwiched in-between two other trips.

I am truly grateful for the mentality I’ve been able to cultivate over the past two years that made the concept of finding a cheap flight and just going somewhere a reality. I am truly grateful to have jobs that afford me the luxury of a salary and time off that allow me to do so as well. This trip has helped me grow and will continue to do so and I consider myself lucky to be able to do so.

Now to the hotel where I will drop my bags and meet the crew for dinner.


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FROM Yudanashi: Tipping
I can count on my right hand the number of times I’ve left 0 tip. Last night was one of those times.

We had a group of 12 people for a bachelor party in Montreal and went to dinner at a great restaurant with solid food. We had 2 servers who were doing a solid job until the kitchen made a mistake and they didn’t know how to respond.

Sadly how you respond when things go wrong is the biggest indicator of performance, both in being a server and in other roles in life.

The kitchen made a mistake and instead of Prosciutto and Capers pizzas they made BBQ Chicken pizzas. A not out of the blue mistake that could be filled. Our server let us know but the only solution he offered was to add the other toppings on top of a BBQ chicken pizza.

Not only would that taste horrible, it was the only solution he offered at all. We had to request a menu and provide an alternative solution which isn’t crazy but when we were trying to find a solution the waiter told my female friend to ‘Calm Down!’ we almost lost it right there.

However we held it together, ordered an alternative and ate away. But when the bill came they charged us for both the pizza and the alternative entree to fix the item and an extra drink.

Having worked in a restaurant I knew this wasn’t right and got up to speak to the manager who dealt with the situation quickly and professionally however I felt strongly that the ridicule and attitude the server presented didn’t warrent a tip so I didn’t give him one.

This view was reinforced when, upon exiting the restaurant the server came down to pull me away from our group and ask why I hadn’t given a tip. I informed him that he knew exactly why and he proceeded to defend himself.

I try to look for lessons in everything and in this case I recalled a principle that I was taught on a campaign trail as a piece of advice I’ve articulated to staff on multiple occasions. When (not if) you screw up, come to your manager with the details of what happened and some proactive options to improve it.

The skill of trying  to resolve things that go wrong in a helpful manner is just that, a skill that needs to be learned. I’ve had good teachers over the years but am in no way perfect at this. I have learned that when things go wrong, trying to solve them by myself usually just makes the problem worse though.

And so while I am sorry that server didn’t get a tip from me, I am glad I had a valuable lesson reinforced for me.


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FROM Yudanashi: New Personal Record
“Oh! Looks like your passport expires soon” – these were the first words at the airport in London I remember last Friday.

Shocked that I might not be able to make my crazy travel I skeptically asked “really?” as the ticket agent told me that yeah, 2018 was just around the corner.

I quickly mentioned that I fully hope to run out of stamp pages before then.

That was how my 10-day trip around the world started. I had never had that thought before of getting the passport filled rather than expired but as I said it, it just made sense.

In the past 10 days I’ve added a ton of miles, experiences, stamps, currencies, and life into me. My wallet currently has US Dollars, GB Pounds, Euros, Japanese Yen, and Canadian dollars and besides the surealness of it all I’m fine with that.

This was my first Asia trip, my first trip where my plan was to not have a plan at a couple of destinations, my first 12-hr flight (and my 2nd) and my first bachelor party (and my 2nd).

I started the trip thinking I was absolutely crazy and that I may not survive some of the legs. But today when checking into my final day of travel from Montreal to London I had already become a new person. I saw it when the Customs agent asked me why I’d come to Canada. When I told her I’d come for my best friends bachelor party she said “And you came all the way from London just for that!?”

I took a beat and let her know I’d flown from Tokyo for it and she wanted to hear the whole tale. In describing the completed journey – the past – I realized how much I’d done and how easy it had become.

After this trip I do hope to fill up my passport before it expires. I hope to travel even more and have at least 1 trip in the next 30 days to book if not 5 before the year is out.

One valuable lesson I’ve learned is how flexible and ready to go I now am. In the future if someone asks me to go to XYZ country the next week I know that I can do it. I know I can catch a flight and not worry about any anxiety of travel outside of my travel restrictions on the ground. I really hope to get the chance to share this mindset with others, especially my nieces and nephews.


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FROM Yudanashi: $15 Empathy
“I know you have a thankless job, and these sweets a small one way I wanted to say thank you for all that you do.” – I say these lines just about every time I board a flight longer than a couple of hours as I hand a flight attendant a bag filled with mini-snickers or other chocolates that cost under $15.

I enjoy seeing their faces light up as they are surprised and on almost every flight I have other flight attendants stopping by to thank me while slipping me goodies and-or upgrading my flight experience. Occasionally though, miracles happen. Like last night’s flight from New York JFK to London Heathrow that I had to get rebooked onto because of an earlier delay meaning I was on the last flight out and exhausted from travel.

As I summoned a smile and handed the bag to the flight attendants I was recognized by an attendant from a flight over a year ago for whom I’d also given chocolates and a smile to. He asked politely to take a look at my ticket, looked at his flight manifest and said “Mr. Baker, welcome to Business Class, your seat is now 2C – would you like some champagne?”



I was blown away and so grateful because 2C meant a seat that turned into a bed in which I passed out for a solid 6 hours. I missed dinner, snacks, and breakfast, but that sleep was exactly what my body needed to round-out the past 10 days of travel.

Later I asked him about it and he informed me they had been looking for passengers to volunteer for a later flight because it was an oversold flight. However they were also looking to upgrade a few medallion members to Business Class to free up spots in the back as well. Once we were on the plane the flight attendants have a lot of control and my kindness and human sincerity as I boarded the flight was returned with instant karma.

This is the very rare exception as its happened three times in 2 years of travel across multiple airlines. In many cases flight attendants can lose their jobs for spot-upgrades but I met some of the qualifications in this case so it wasn’t a big deal.

One of the key things throughout my 2 years bringing chocolates is that I should never expect anything in return. If I stand there waiting to be treated specially it will never happen. And sometimes it doesn’t happen at all even when I am sincere. What I’ve learned is that regardless of the perks I find myself being a better human being when I empathize with the tough job they have.

Additionally, what this flight in particular taught me is that this is not a single-round game (to use game theory language). It isn’t a one-off deal where the relationship doesn’t matter. The flight attendant who flies JFK-LHR a dozen times a month recognized me for having done the same in the past. Often times with customer service representatives I’ve found myself thinking “Well I’ll never talk with them again, so it doesn’t matter if I vent my frustration to them.” Not only do I lack empathy in those situations, I’ve literally dehumanized people.

How often do you get frustrated with the hotel check-in desk, the server at your restaurant, the internet hook-up guy who showed up late, the food truck vendor, your uber driver, your bartender. What good does that frustration, that de-humanization and lack of empathy do for you? Does it make you feel better or superior as you retell the story of how badly you were “mistreated”? How would those exchanges play out differently if you took 10 seconds to make a human connection with that person and built up a micro-relationship with them so that they were motivated to help you find a solution.

I’ve worked retail customer service and remember taking extra care of the nice customers and finding ways to use our policies to help them – something I didn’t do for those who were rude. Working as a host to a restaurant with 4 hour wait times I sat patrons who were kind and understanding ahead of others when the rules could be stretched to allow it – those who were rude didn’t get my rapt attention. While its true that sometimes the squeaky wheel gets the oil and service staff might cave in to someone who is angry just to get them to go away I don’t think the angry customer – the apathetic customer – will ever get special treatment.

Last night’s flight was a reminder that I can and must do better at showing empathy, that repeated actions have consequences, and that there is almost nothing better than an upgrade valued at $4,000+ that only cost you a smile and $15 worth of sweets.


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FROM Yudanashi: A Novel in a Year!
According to the Nebula Award categories, a novel must be over 40,000 words. In the past year I have written assignments for 22 classes totaling just under 65,000 words. A novel and a half.

Today I turned in the last 3,000 words in an essay all about the power of storytelling in business and how I learned to apply it over my summer internship. With that submission I am now finished with all assignments for my MBA and have just under 2 weeks until I have my first of two graduation ceremonies. Two you ask? Surely one is enough!?!

Nope, its Oxford and they are weird. I graduate with the MBA in September 2016 as a recognition for finishing the course and ending the 12 months of academics I’ve endured. We will have a commencement speaker, parents are flying into town, the whole works.

I also graduate as an Oxford University masters student with my college in March 2017 because the college waits until all 65,000 words have been fully graded by not one but two assessors and then have the results certified after an exam board meets to ensure no foul play has been afoot or to apply a curve if they feel the flippant need to.

What this means in reality though is that I am done. My year in Oxford is essentially over and now all I have to focus on is securing a job, a home, a visa, a country, a life after school. This means applying to yet more and more jobs, prepping for interviews, having interviews if I’m so lucky and then waiting by the phone. Waiting, waiting, waiting.

I don’t know which is worse, the waiting or the writing? Either way it will all be over soon. I just finished the travels and moving my stuff back up to Oxford from London where it will stay for ~4 weeks. Not long before that I’ll have to make a call and find a home for my stuff while I figure out what’s next.

That being said, I am not worried. I have a degree from Oxford, a network I’ve spent a year building up in addition to the one I left back in the states. I have my past experience and new tools and skills to succeed. I could panic and freak out but if I’ve learned one thing over the year of writing 65,000 words its that panicking doesn’t solve the writing. It won’t solve the waiting either. Only getting to work will do that and that’s one thing I know how to do.


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FROM Xyeek: Some Reflections: The First Official 2 Weeks
Ok, remember how I said in my previous post prior to starting the MBA that it was two weeks of crazy? Scratch that - the last two official weeks have been so intense that it's felt like I've been at LBS for 2 months. My fellow classmates can attest to that.

On FOMO (fear of missing out)...
While all MBA alumni and current students tell you to try and avoid FOMO, I'm discovering that trying to do
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FROM Yudanashi: Mom comes first
Sometimes Mom comes into town, you meet her at the airport to surprise her. Shenanigans ensue. You grab dinner and chat. You don’t write a long blog post that day. Whoops!


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FROM Yudanashi:
“Would you like to take this hop-on hop-off tour of Washington DC?”

“No I’m from New York!”

“So you’re visiting DC then, take this tour!”

“Didn’t you hear me? I’m from New York. We despise these tourist traps and know better!”

That exchange happened between a friend of mine in DC and a tour-bus sales guy. You know the ones who sell you over-priced tickets to sit on a double-decker bus and have a guide tell you mostly true things about the city while you can take it all in and get off at various local attractions. One of those attractions always being Madame Tussaud’s wax museum btw.

I enjoyed my friend’s conversation at the time and have tried to embody that same New Yorker attitude throughout my travels. In Italy I made it a rule to keep looking for food if I could hear someone selling a “selfie stick”. It has been a great rule because I’ve never felt concerned about pick-pockets, I’ve always found amazing tasting and well-priced food, and I’ve had an enjoyable day.

The closest I’ve gotten to something similar are the student-led walking tours. These I respect a lot as its typically history or art students giving a walking tour for free to a group of people. In Barcelona I found one half-way through and at the end made certain I tipped the guy because that is how he gets paid. Those walking tours have always been well done and give me a very different flair than the tourist traps.

Well today I learned that I travel very differently from my parents. Perhaps its age, perhaps funding, perhaps, attitude. But we got on one of those busses. And to be honest it wasn’t that terrible. It was over-priced. And it was generic. But for people who have limited mobility and are jet-lagged. It wasn’t completely terrible.

I’m still going to go on adventures and meet locals and avoid tourists like the plague, but I will try to do it with less judgement in he future. These things have a place, its just not for me. Like viking river cruises, maybe I’ll appreciate them when I’m old.

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FROM Yudanashi: Tourism
“Would you like to take this hop-on hop-off tour of Washington DC?”

“No I’m from New York!”

“So you’re visiting DC then, take this tour!”

“Didn’t you hear me? I’m from New York. We despise these tourist traps and know better!”

That exchange happened between a friend of mine in DC and a tour-bus sales guy. You know the ones who sell you over-priced tickets to sit on a double-decker bus and have a guide tell you mostly true things about the city while you can take it all in and get off at various local attractions. One of those attractions always being Madame Tussaud’s wax museum btw.

I enjoyed my friend’s conversation at the time and have tried to embody that same New Yorker attitude throughout my travels. In Italy I made it a rule to keep looking for food if I could hear someone selling a “selfie stick”. It has been a great rule because I’ve never felt concerned about pick-pockets, I’ve always found amazing tasting and well-priced food, and I’ve had an enjoyable day.

The closest I’ve gotten to something similar are the student-led walking tours. These I respect a lot as its typically history or art students giving a walking tour for free to a group of people. In Barcelona I found one half-way through and at the end made certain I tipped the guy because that is how he gets paid. Those walking tours have always been well done and give me a very different flair than the tourist traps.

Well today I learned that I travel very differently from my parents. Perhaps its age, perhaps funding, perhaps, attitude. But we got on one of those busses. And to be honest it wasn’t that terrible. It was over-priced. And it was generic. But for people who have limited mobility and are jet-lagged. It wasn’t completely terrible.

I’m still going to go on adventures and meet locals and avoid tourists like the plague, but I will try to do it with less judgement in he future. These things have a place, its just not for me. Like viking river cruises, maybe I’ll appreciate them when I’m old.


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FROM Yudanashi: Weddings
It was a wedding to aspire to. Set against a European backdrop that was “home” and surrounded by family, friends, and loved ones the bride and groom were beautiful. The ceremony included groomsmen in full morning coats – tails and top-hats – and bridesmaids from multiple countries as their courtship spanned great distances.

This wedding was my first full taste of what Oxford SBS looked like as it was one of my best friends, her father calls us brother and sister, who was marrying a graduate of Oxford SBS class of 2012. I attended their wedding and was blown away by the experience. For context, the wedding was literally featured in Brides magazine a few months later.

But what blew me away were the people. The SBS classmates who had come from all over the globe to see their friend get married and to party and celebrate with him. I met a dozen students that October evening and chatted with them about the program and their experience. It was at that wedding that I bumped Oxford from low on my list of schools to the top.

The inclusiveness and camaraderie that the class exuded was on full display and I was smitten by it. More so than from any other MBA program.

A wedding helped me make up my mind in favor of Oxford and as we head into graduation week I got the chance to participate in a wedding for two of my best friends in the program who got married yesterday inside the great cathedral of Christ Church College.

I’ve had the pleasure of attending services with them there for most of the year. Saving each other seats when one or all of us are running late and brunching afterwards as we discuss the sermon. The church helped bind our friendship together more than the committees we sat on or the classes we had together. It allowed us to spend time and space away from school without leaving it and that helped us grow closer.

Their wedding was again outstanding. Groomsman in morning coats and bridesmaids from multiple countries. Guests from 6 continents and more than a dozen languages spoken just int he wedding party alone. The ceremony was held in the cathedral and the reception in the gorgeous town hall just next door. With guest dancing until after 4 am I’d say it was an amazing way to start the end of my time at Oxford and a great matching bookend to the wedding that brought me here in the first place.

What struck me most about the wedding personally was how that same camaraderie existed between strangers united in the common purpose of supporting their union at both weddings. I have never been one to plan out my big day and think about color schemes and outfits, and the like. I may have protested outside the Supreme Court for my right to get married but the wedding itself hasn’t held a major interest to me.

But after last night, I know that beyond the venue, beyond the cake, beyond the outfits I will only care about bringing that same spirit of unity into my wedding. Everything else is negotiable but I want to have that feeling with me and I hope many of the guests from last night will be able to join me on that day.


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FROM Xyeek: Fresher Flu - London Needs Better Tissues
There's been a nasty cold going around campus and I've recently caught it. :( Now 3 out of 5 of us in my study group are at various stages of sick. In fact one of our members was so ill previously, he ended up missing on our stream trip to Amsterdam.

If you sat in any of my classes, you'll find me coughing and blowing my nose, with a growing pile of tissues in front of me. In the last 3 days
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FROM Xyeek: And so Term 1 Begins
Term 1 has begun. If you're confused, wondering what my post on the last 2 official weeks was, that was pre-term. What that means is that the school is now more crowded with not just MBAs and MiFs, but also the MiMs, MFAs and EMBAs.

It also means that more of the "real" classes are starting. While my schedule doesn't look as full as it was say 2 weeks ago, it's deceptive. There's now more time
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FROM From Bench to Board (Fuqua): Is the Master of Business Administration Right for Me? (Guest Post)
Whether you’re an entrepreneur, aspiring business leader, or you just think that you may want to learn more about business, the thought of getting your Masters in Business Administration may cross your mind. But while an MBA can be extremely beneficial for achieving career and life goals for many people, for others, it is a waste of time and money. So, how do you know whether or not getting your MBA would be worth the time and expense?
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FROM From Bench to Board (Fuqua): Is the Master's in Business Administration Right for Me? (Guest Post)
Whether you’re an entrepreneur, aspiring business leader, or you just think that you may want to learn more about business, the thought of getting your Masters in Business Administration may cross your mind. But while an MBA can be extremely beneficial for achieving career and life goals for many people, for others, it is a waste of time and money. So, how do you know whether or not getting your MBA would be worth the time and expense?
Continue reading »
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FROM From Bench to Board (Fuqua): Love the Industry you're in and Be an Expert
There is without a doubt a stereotype for recent MBA grads – folks who are ambitious, smart, hard-working, but oftentimes lack experience or domain knowledge. Looking around and at myself, I think this is somewhat true, but there are steps to take to quickly be treated as a peer among veterans in the industry of your post-MBA career.

Here’s what you gotta do.

This is the 5th and final post in my series, Career Development 101, tailored specifically for professionals with MBAs, doing their MBA, or thinking of doing an MBA.
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