AWA Score: 5.5 out of 6
Coherence and connectivity: 5/5
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.
Paragraph structure and formation: 3.5/5
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.
Vocabulary and word expression: 5/5
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!
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https://gmatclub.com/forum/awa-forum-ru ... 64141.htmlGood Luckewanleeyz wrote:
ON THE face of it, American higher education is still in rude health. In worldwide rankings more than half of the top 100 universities, and eight of the top ten, are American. The scientific output of American institutions is unparalleled. They produce most of the world’s Nobel laureates and scientific papers. Moreover college graduates, on average, still earn far more and receive better benefits than those who do not have a degree. Nonetheless, there is growing anxiety in America about higher education. A degree has always been considered the key to a good job. But rising fees and increasing student debt, combined with shrinking financial and educational returns, are undermining at least the perception that university is a good investment.
Discuss how well-reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counterexamples
The argument claims that soaring tuition fees , along with the inevitable student debt , are diluting the importance of tertiary education in America . Furthermore, the statement implies that these shortcomings outweigh the necessary benefits such a hefty investment will bring , and that people are increasingly averse to investing in a degree due to the growing consensus that returns have been reducing over the course of time. Stated in this way the argument fails to mention several key factors , on the basis of which it could be evaluated. The conclusion relies on assumptions, for which there is no clear evidence. Therefore, the argument is rather weak, unconvincing, and has several flaws.
Firstly, the argument readily assumes that the state of American higher education is still largely compromised. This statement is a stretch and is not substantiated in any way. For instance , in the US alone there have been numerous high achievers who demonstrate strong academic prowess , and whom have been admitted into various top institutions including Harvard , Stanford and Princeton. Moreover, these students also exude a good flair for academics and an enthusiastic attitude to learn during their term as a university student. Additionally, the diverse curriculum offered exclusively by US schools promises a holistic education , producing graduates with ample soft and hard skills that allow them to make significant impact wherever they go . Clearly, all these prove that the American higher education system is well developed and doesn’t compromise quality for the sake of profit , besides having a good track record of producing well-rounded graduates, a point further corroborated by employment statistics in the UK. The argument could have been much clearer if it explicitly stated what factors have contributed to the supposed deteriorating higher education landscape in the UK .
Secondly, the argument claims that returns on tertiary education have been decreasing, at least in the US. It thus suggest that current graduates do not earn as much as their predecessors , and that it is unlikely they will be able to profit as much too. This is again a very weak and unsupported claim as the argument does not demonstrate any correlation between past and current graduates’ incomes. In fact, the argument does not present a clear picture as to how graduates’ incomes have been reducing. To illustrate , graduates from top institutions in the US are able to assume lucrative careers post-graduation. This continues to be the case even today. For instance , Harvard MBA students usually get hired in renowned firms in 6 months post-graduation. Hence , If the argument had provided evidence that US graduate incomes from top universities have been reducing until today , the argument would have been a lot more convincing.
Finally, the argument posits that , despite US universities being featured in league tables as top institutions , graduates are still ill-prepared for the workforce and will likely not earn as much to profit on their investments. This raises several questions , among which include as to how these institutions have been listed as top universities if their graduates have abysmal employment prospects. It also implies that such league tables primarily gauge a university’s quality base on its research output , and all other factors are secondary. The former question however demands intense scrutiny since it should not be possible for a university to come up top if its graduates are nigh unemployable . Without convincing answers to this question, one cannot determine if graduates from US universities are truly ill-prepared for the workforce.
In summary, the argument is flawed and therefore unconvincing. It could be considerably strengthened if the author clearly mentioned all the relevant facts. In order to assess the merits of a certain situation, it is essential to have full knowledge of all contributing factors.