Art and music have long been understood to have therapeutic effects fo

Question

Question :

"Art and music have long been understood to have therapeutic effects for individuals who suffer from either physical or mental illnesses. However, most doctors rarely recommend to patients some form of art or music therapy. Instead, doctors focus almost all of their attention on costly drug treatments and invasive procedures that carry serious risks and side-effects. By focusing on these expensive procedures rather than low-cost treatments such as art and music therapy, doctors are doing a disservice to their patients and contributing to the rising cost of health care in the United States."

My Report :

The article concludes that By focusing on these expensive procedures rather than low-cost treatments such as art and music therapy, doctors are doing a disservice to their patients and contributing to the rising cost of health care in the United States. To justify his conclusion the author notes that Doctors rarely recommend art therapy, and focus almost all their attention on costly drug treatments and invasive procedures that carry serious risks and side-effects and that Art and music have long been understood to have therapeutic effects for individuals who suffer from either physical or mental illness. I find this argument logically not convincing enough in several aspects.
 
 First of all doctors doing a disservice to their patients and contributing to the rising cost of health care in the United States is based on questionable assumption that Doctors intentionally use the costly procedures and treatments. It is entirely possible that Doctors use the costly procedures to arrive at the cause of illness and treat the illness. Hence, the author's generalization is unreliable. The author, However, can support his argument by stating that Most of the doctors use costly procedures and treatments intentionally. 
 
 On other hand, The author assumes that any form of illness can be treated by a cost efficient art and music treatment. This assumption is unwarranted. Suppose, there exists an illness like cancer, which cannot be treated with art or music treatment. This can lead to attack on the conclusion. Hence, the argument is not just.
 
 In Conclusion, the argument is flawed and defective and the argument is not a strong argument. Because the Doctors prescribing costly drug treatments and expensive procedures, and art and music have long been understood to have therapeutic effects for individuals who suffer from either physical or mental illnesses. does not actively support the conclusion that doctors are doing a disservice to their patients and contributing to the rising cost of health care in the United States By focusing on these expensive procedures rather than low-cost treatments such as art and music therapy. To strengthen the argument the author must, at the very least, provide the assumptions stated above.

Marysmith · Answer

In the preceding argument, the author contends that, by following expensive procedures for the treatment of their patients, doctors contribute to the ascending cost of health care in the United States. Although the arguer presents some facts as evidence in proof of his claim, the argument, as it stands, is based on questionable assumptions and a faulty line of reasoning, a fact which renders it over-simplistic and unconvincing.

First of all, when the author states that, art and music have therapeutic effects for people who suffer from physical or mental illnesses, he assumes that their conditions can be easily fixed by the power of these forms of entertainment. What he fails to examine however is that the majority of these people tend to experience their illnesses on a such a grave scale, that they often need medical intervention in order to get better. Specifically, we do not know what the exact prognosis of these conditions is and whether these patients are in need of specific drug prescriptions that will assist them in their process of healing.

Moreover, the author of the argument proceeds with other unsubstantiated assumptions by claiming that most doctors rarely recommend to patients some form of art or music therapy. Again, he takes for granted that many people who suffer from physical illnesses can be magically healed from the relaxing sounds of music or even the therapeutic habits of painting or drawing. To be more precise, he fails to consider that physically injured people demand the prescription of certain drugs or, in extreme cases, are in need of invasive medical procedures, in order to be properly fixed and healed.

Finally, the whole argument is based on the generalization that all doctors prefer to provide medicines to physically or mentally injured individuals, without considering that such inductive reasoning proceeds from a premise about a sample to a conclusion about the whole population of doctors around the States.

Overall, the conclusion of the argument is not adequately supported by its premises since it requires the reader to accept too many questionable assumptions. The author of the argument must do a better job in addressing the flaws in his reasoning in order to make the conclusion more appealing.

bb · Answer

AWA Score: 5 - 5.5 out of 6!
I have used a GMATAWA auto-grader to evaluate your essay.

Coherence and connectivity: 3.5/5
This rating corresponds to the flow of idea and expression from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analysed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.

Paragraph structure and formation: 5/5
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs is evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.

Vocabulary and word expression: 5/5
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocaubulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word-usage. Simple is the best form of suave!

Please do not forget to use the Chineseburnt AWA Template! https://gmatclub.com/forum/how-to-get-6 ... 64327.html

stuti1614 · Answer

The afore-mentioned argument, states a claim that doctors, by focusing on expensive procedures rather than low-cost treatments such as art and music therapy, are doing a disservice to their patients and contributing to the rising cost of health care in the United States. This claim is backed up by premise that art and music have therapeutic effects for individuals who suffer either physical or mental illnesses. At first glance, the argument seems convincing, but upon further analysis of the argument and its underlying structure, a number of flaws become evident. These flaws include feeble evidence, weak claims and overreaching assumptions.

Firstly, the argument mentions art and music have been understood to have therapeutic effects for individuals who suffer physical or emotional illness. The author has mentioned this and assumed it to be true without thinking of the possibility that for some individuals, the therapy might work and thus everyone started believing it provides results. Had the author mentioned the number and percentage of people for whom the therapy might work, it would have strengthened the argument.

Secondly, the argument has committed a fallacy by directly providing the claim that the therapy works without backing it up with a study done by a research organization with which, the claim can be believed to be true. If the author would have provided study done by research and claimed it to be true, it would have made the argument much stronger.

Thirdly, if at all, we believe the claim to be true, the argument mentions that the doctors rarely go for the art and music therapy and instead focus on the expensive treatments. The author here ignores that the doctors might best know that the art and music therapy might only work for rare cases and that’s the reason they recommend the art and music therapy rarely. The author instead assumes that the art & music therapy might replace the expensive treatments totally and the doctors might only recommend that instead of the expensive treatments they give. Had the author mentioned that the expensive treatments might be entirely replaced as it shows the exact results as shown by the expensive medicines, the author would have been able to make the argument stronger.

Moreover, the argument mentions that the doctor is doing a disservice to patients and contributing to the rising cost of health care in the United States. Here the author has assumed that there are no other reasons which would have contributed to the rising cost of health care in the United States. The author, in order to make the argument stronger, should have mentioned the same.

In conclusion, the argument in its current state, contains a number of defects, most evident of which, have been discussed above. Had the argument managed to address or acknowledge the mentioned concerns, the argument would have been difficult to refute and it would have justified its position. However, one must conclude the argument, as is, has got a lot of gaps and assumptions and deficiencies in the information provided.

Sajjad1994 · Answer

AWA Score: 5.5 out of 6

Coherence and connectivity: 5/5  
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.

Paragraph structure and formation: 3/5   
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.

Vocabulary and word expression: 4/5 
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!

Good Luck

94Swati · Answer

Please rate my essay on this argument:

Your Response:
The argument states that art and music have therapeutic effects for individuals suffering from either physical or mental illnesses and hence, doctors should recommend art/ music therapy to patients instead of the costly drug treatments and invasive procedures. Though the argument seems appealing at first reading, it is not completely logical and concludes on an extreme note. Firstly, the argument does not explain the meaning of therapeutic effects on patients. It is not clear whether art and music help to cure a medical ailment independent of any medicine or surgery. If not, the argument falls flat and does not justify the conclusion of doctors doing a disservice to their patients. Further, even if music and art may help with alleviating pain and may speed up recovery of patients, it may not be the case for all patients or for all diseases. The conclusion states that doctors are doing a disservice to patients by ignoring low-cost treatments of art and music therapy. It suggests that such therapy can be an alternative to the drugs and surgeries recommended by doctors. No evidence is given to support this extreme view. It is well established that certain medical situations such as cancers or even bone injuries etc. can be treated only with special surgeries and drugs. Certain serious mental illnesses also require regular administration of sedatives and drugs. In such cases, art and music therapy plays a small role in treatment. The argument does not take into account emergency cases such as blood loss due to accidents, loss of sight, organ failure, poisoning, pregnancy complications etc. in which a patient's life depends on timely medical care using drugs and invasive surgeries. The therapy may show results only in the long term and cannot help with cases requiring immediate medical attention.The argument assumes that medical doctors are trained to recommend art and music therapy along with normal medical procedures, let alone as a substitute to such procedures. The current medical curriculum may not support such treatment advice and hence, the doctors may not be aware of the benefits of such therapy. Thus, it would be incorrect to suggest that doctors are ignoring such treatments and contributing intentionally to the cost burden of medical healthcare in the United States. Thus, the argument is not completely logical and could be strengthened by additional information as discussed above.

Sajjad1994 · Answer

So this essay is consist of one paragraph? right?

Art and music have long been understood to have therapeutic effects fo

Prep Toolkit

Top 5 GMAT Debrief Videos

615 to 715 in 15 Days (Ria's Strategies)

More than Quant/Verbal Abilities: Speed vs. Accuracy

745 with Only Self-Prep and GMAT Club

From 555 to 765: 210-point Improvement

Perfect 805 Score Debrief by Julia

My Rewards